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7/10
Entertainment - Yes, Tolkien - No
21 December 2014
Warning: Spoilers
I think by the third time around it should have been clear to just about everyone that the Hobbit movies bear very little resemblance to the books. Hardly any character was left unchanged, and the concept of the world of Middle-earth itself and what makes it tick... though it did follow the main turning points of the plot.

As Martin Freeman said in his interview to the Empire Magazine, it was either psychological thriller or a slapstick comedy - and for me it was definitely slapstick comedy.

The prologue, which showed burning of the Esgaroth and the slaying of Smaug by Bard the Bowman was not slapstick - but then again, it was just the prologue. It did not set the tone for the movie, which had endless Legolas fighting laws of physics tricks, clichéd dialog and love triangles with an impossible love twist, unnecessary detours, and comic relief both as intended by Peter Jackson and where it was not, but grew naturally out of ridiculousness of it all. However, because I have taught myself to forget about canon when watching the films, I enjoyed it a lot my first time around. I laughed a lot, I applauded when Azog jumped out from under the ice...

If you liked Desolation of Smaug, I think you will like Battle of the Five Armies too - it has the same pure entertainment quality to it, like a video game or an amusement park ride, but unlike Desolation of Smaug, I never felt the movie drag and wasn't tempted to look at my watch.

What it does lack is the coherent plot development, and especially the closure of multiple plot lines. So we are left hanging as to the fate of Erebor, the fate of the Arkenstone, etc. In a way, it feels like LotR spin off/fanfiction in terms of not being able to stand on its own. More LotR movies than the book Hobbit on which it is primarily based. I highlight that, because tout as they might the "Appendices", there is hardly anything borrowed from there. It is basically the Hobbit book and the screenwriters' imagination.
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6/10
Entertaining
21 December 2014
It doesn't pretend to be historical fiction, so I don't understand people dissing it for not being true to history. Vampires are not exactly historical, are they, now? It does not pretend to follow the literary source - Bram Stoker's famous novel - either. It is a free-form fantasy about how Dracula the vampire could have started. Though the main reason to watch that story is to watch Luke Evans. If you are not a fan, feel free to skip the movie, although it is only 90 minutes and the pace is brisk. It's not really logical within itself either, but it does have interesting fighting scenes, somewhat clichéd family scenes, and it has Luke Evans looking very hot and Charles Dance playing the coolest vampire in decades - cool because it is intelligent, not because it sparkles. I enjoyed it, because I knew what to expect. If someone came into it looking for a serious look at the history of Vlad III, then they better leave after the first few minutes.
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Frozen (I) (2013)
10/10
A Fun Fairy Tale for All Ages
12 January 2014
I took my Mom to see Frozen over the holidays, and we both loved it. It is visually beautiful in the tradition of Tangled (but better - ice looks stunning in digital!), with great songs - and many non-trivial choices that kept this fairy tale interesting and new and fresh. There were some characters that young kids would appreciate (Olaf the Snowman) and some jokes that hit home with the grown-up girls... All my friends who have seen it - we are all in our 30s - loved it and laughed at it... It's an ultimate feel-good chick flick in a cartoon form, which manages not to insult the viewers' intelligence to boot. Unless you hate (digital) animation or still think that girls have cooties - this movie is probably worth seeing.
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4/10
Heavy on clichés and CGI, somewhat entertaining
12 January 2014
A hardcore Tolkien fan (as in read all of the HoME!) for some twenty years, I have an uneasy relationships with Peter Jackson's films based on Tolkien's works. While I did not like the Lord of the Rings movies for straying from the books while still pretending to be faithful to them, I loved the first Hobbit film for being a fun adventure movie that did not even pretend to follow its literary source. It was not perfect, but it grabbed and held attention enough for me to overlook its flaws.

The Desolation of Smaug felt... like a high schooler's standard pattern essay transferred to the big screen. I had two problems with it. The first one is that action sequences were too long and repetitive, to the point of being boring (and I generally like pure action movies!). I would cut each major action sequence in half... The second one is how predictable it is. Here is an exposition tying this moment to what's coming next, there is a direct quote from the LotR movies, here is some other way to tie it to LotR... I don't like being force-fed information in such an obvious fashion, though some people apparently found all the tie-ins to LotR endearing...

An interesting thing was, right after I walked out of the theater, I though it was a pretty good and entertaining movie, then I started to mostly focus on the flaws. A week later I saw it again for the "final" opinion - and again, sitting in the theater during the movie I thought that perhaps I was unfair to the movie and it is actually pretty good... but then the next day I could not remember any positives, only the flaws.

To me it felt... insubstantial. A cinematic pulp fiction of sorts...

I think if I were a 10-12 year old boy who has not read Tolkien but watched LotR movies, I would have absolutely loved it. But I am none of those things, which is why I give it 4/10. Maybe would have given it 6/10 when just walking out of the movie...

This will be the first Middle-earth movie that I will not be buying in a theatrical version on DVD since I highly doubt I will want to see it again until the extended edition comes out. It is so boring that I don't even want to discuss it online, like I did with the LotR movies... it took me a month to decide to write this review after all...
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for Russians - funny
5 February 2002
I can't say I laughed (but, well, I rarely laugh at movies) but I liked it. I liked the way Russians were portrayed in the movie (being a Russian :)) I have not seen other PA movies, so I can't compare, but this movie was interesting to me from the point "how do they portray us" :)
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