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Reviews
The Cleveland Show (2009)
Awful
I think Stewie's statement in the opening of the pilot sums up this show pretty well, "What the Devil? Why is he getting his own show?". When I heard there was going to be a spin off of Family Guy, I was happy- you know- we could learn more about one of the funnier characters such as Quagmire or maybe Brian or even Stewie. But they completely and utterly failed that by picking the least funny character on the show- Cleveland. I watched the premier episode. It was atrocious. Quite possibly one of the worst animated shows I have ever seen. Every time I see the trailer for a new episode, I cringe. It's just horrible. Sadly, FOX renewed it for season 2, and it will probably last at least 4 seasons.
The Proposal (2009)
Typical. Hollywood. Crap
this movie had a lot of things going for it.. a great cast, and not-too-bad acting, but all- in-all The Proposal sucumbs to the typical Hollywood bullcrap that's in all movies today.. they ALMOST didn't do it, but alas, at the end, they did. too bad, because this movie could have been good..
The good: Sandra Bullock is still in amazing shape and still looks great, and you get to see her partially naked. The bad: see: the rest if the movie
p.s. they even almost-but-didn't kill Betty White, which would have prepared us for the reality which will happen soon.. I mean, what is she.. 98?
Town Creek (2009)
Ugh
I'm one of about 300 people who have seen this movie... and it kind of sucks.. Joel Schumacer is the 2nd worst director ever (behind Michael bay) and the movie goes from confusing to stupid to flat out silly. Dominic Purcell delivers his typical "strong bald man with optional facial hair" performance he gives in everything he's in.. the other cast members did nothing to stand out.
it's also slow, boring, and I was the only one in the theater. it was still much better than "Drag Me To Hell". and I did enjoy the ending.
But all in all, a typical Lionsgate release. They did nothing to promote this film, changed titles multiple times (at theaters it was listed as "Blood Creek"), and it went straight to the cheap theater on a very limited release, and it will probably be a box office bomb.
Fast & Furious (2009)
Much better than expected
Okay, I went into this thinking, "It's gonna suck" because by definition, I hate car racing movies. But then again, i thought, "Hey, this movie made 80 million in the box office, it can't be that bad.." I was surprised at how good it was. It was much better then expected. A little hard to follow at times, and the directing isn't that good (like a Michael Bay film, it's very choppy.. the director never stays on one scene). The acting was pretty good, and like usual, Vin Deisel is badass. The plot is kind of realistic, which is a plus. If someone else had of directed the movie, then it would definitely be much better. Don't watch the movie if you epilepsy, because you'll be having seizures.. It's also very loud at times, but car racing movies SHOULD be loud. Good use of Dolby Digital surround sound...
Overall, 7.8 out of 10.. (rounded up to 8)
Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street (2007)
Confusing, but pretty good.
I think it takes a while to sink in, Because when i first watched this, i was left confused, the entire movie, at least for me, was hard to follow. The acting was good, and the singing was nice, but for the entire movie to make sense.. i had to spend some quality time with the IMDb FAQ section.. which helped a lot. After that, The movie actually made sense. The movie also has really good casting (including Sacha Barah Cohen in a non-comedic role!). Johnny Depp once again does well in a Tim Burton film. The directing was good, because Burton is awesome, and he knows what he's doing. I might actually have to download the soundtrack for this movie. I think i'll re-watch this later, on a bigger screen, with better lighting. That's what i get for watching things on my Ipod..
Armageddon (1998)
Awesome, Thrilling, FUN!
Fun, exciting, movie with an amazing cast. Take Michael Bay's sometimes sloppy directing, J. J. Abrahms screenplay writing skills, Bruce Willis's awesomeness, and throw them all together, and you get Armageddon. I would have rated this a 10 out of 10, but Ben Affleck is in it, and his character (Like every other movie he's in) ruins parts of the movies, yet his character NEVER dies. And Bruce Willis always dies. What's with that? I need a movie where Bruce Willis kills Ben Affleck character. It can be sponsored by Afflack and it can be called "Afflack presents: Affleck getting killed by Bruce Willis". The title kind of gives the whole plot away, but it tells you what you're getting. Despite the sometimes choppy directing (STAY ON ONE SCENE FOR CHRISTS SAKE! 2.3 seconds IS NOT ENOUGH TIME FOR ME TO TELL WHATS HAPPENING!") and Affleck's performance, this movie rocked. What makes it more awesome is they are actually filming at NASA, the first (and only) film to do so. They are using authentic NASA spacesuits valued at over 2 million a suit. In the film, they work with over 19 billion dollars worth of equipment, including a spaceship, an oil rig, and an underwater simulator. It's simple, the movie is flat out awesome.
Captain Mike Across America (2007)
To Little, too Late
I came across this movie when I heard that it was available for free on iTunes. So I downloaded it. I watched about 1/3 of it, but never finished it. I finally got through and finished it yesterday, and here's what I think. It sucked. It falls under the categories of "pointless" and "liberal propaganda" It would be one thing if Moore presented the facts on both sides, and let you choose, but he's so obviously biased towards the left that the movie fails to be a documentary, more of a sweaty fat man's rant. Oh, and wasn't it just amazing how at every college he went to, he was wearing a shirt and/or hat of that college? Gee, way to play to the crowd. There were some funny moments, like when he created funny campaign ads that were in silly ways anti-Kerry. And whenever the counter-protesters showed up, the crowds reaction and Moore's were good. But that's just about all that was good about this movie. It was edited well, and had a pretty good soundtrack (You get to hear Eddie Veder, Tom Morrello, among others). What really disturbed me is one man in the movie gave Moore his dead uncle's Bronze Star.
If anyone has seen "Team America World Police", I love that description of Moore. It's pretty much just like it.
Craig Ferguson: A Wee Bit o' Revolution (2009)
Insanely Funny
If you like the Late Late show with Craig Ferguson, you'll love this special.
It's basically a 2-hour long Craig Ferguson monolouge, but with cursing.
Ferguson makes fun of many different things, such as drugs, alcohol, rehab, Scotland, Sean Connery, his genitalia, movie casting, his mother, and octopuses. All while telling his story about going to Rehab, coming to America, living the American dream, getting casted on the Drew Cary show, and making you laugh while you he does it.
I laughed so hard I cried. I haven't laughed this hard at a comedy special since last time I saw a Jerry Seinfeld skit.
Ferguson is insanely funny, and you'll enjoy him just as much as I did.
George of the Jungle 2 (2003)
Look on the Brightside... They're not making a GOTJ3!
Let me start out by saying this movie has 1 funny point at the very beginning with the exchange between the narrator and George: Narrator:Huh? Wait a minute! Who the heck are you? George: Me new George. Studio too cheap to pay Brendan Fraser. Narrator: How did you get the part? George: New George just lucky, I guess.
Sadly, that's the only funny part in the entire movie.
It was still entertaining...But then again, i'm easily entertained...
I wouldn't say this is the worst movie i've ever seen (that title goes to the terribly un-funny Disaster Movie...), This movie falls #7 on my bottom 15 list...
If your a small child who is easily entertained, you'll enjoy this movie. If you're a movie-watcher who wants a good, funny movie, You'll end up shooting yourself halfway through this one..
Disaster Movie (2008)
The Worst Movie Ever made in the history of Movies
Going in, I new this film would be awful. So I did a little experiment. I counted how many times I laughed during the film.
Here are the results: Laughed: 3 times Smile or smirk at something: 20 times Attempted Jokes in the movie: 300+
Of those 3 laughs, 1 of them was accidental, because i thought they were about to parody "The Happening" But it turned out otherwise.
That's only 1 percent of the time this movie was funny to me.
The Plot was stupid. The Characters were stupid. The parodies were stupid. The entire film was just plain retarded.
This movie makes me wish that IMDb let you ranked movies from 0 to 10 instead of just 1 to 10, because this movie would end up with around a 0.2 overall rating.... and that would only be because Jason Friedberg & Aaron Seltzer logged on and gave it a 10.
Some comedies are rather Hit & Miss-ish. Some comedies Have complex jokes that the viewer would have to know a lot about to understand, making the joke only funny to the person who wrote it. This movie is not a Hit and miss. It's a Miss and Miss and miss some more. There are no complex Jokes that require intelligent thought.
My guess is if you show this to a baby, the baby will start crying, throw things at the TV and yell until you make the painful movie go away.
In Conclusion: Disaster Movie is: a complete and total... disaster.
i give it a Negative 1 out of 10. according to the votes here, 1,273 people voted this movie a 10. That means there's at least 1273 people who randomly rate movies 10 out of 10 without ever seeing them.
I want the 90 minutes of my life back i wasted on this film...