OutsideHollywoodLand Reviews

Mildred Pierce (2011)

Pale Remake of a Stellar Classic

[28 September 2011]

Todd Haynes's uber-Mommie Dearest drama, starring Kate Winslet, reminds one of a faded postcard, found in an old box of precious keepsakes – wistfully pretty to look at – for a moment anyway. The 5+ hour remake of the 1945 Warner Bros film classic, drags in all the wrong places, partly due to the cable giant's "bigger is better" miniseries mania and the miscasting of the central characters of Mildred Pierce, Veda (the elder), and Monty Beragon. In their determination to render up a carbon copy of the book, written by James M. Cain in 1941, Mildred Pierce 2011 is transformed into a tired and over-wrought tale that signifies a lot of ho-hum. Directed and co-adapted for the mini-screen by Todd Haynes, his Mildred Pierce adds all the modern clichés of incestual longings and guy-on-girl action, which does little to save this remake from tanking. If anything, suggesting that Mildred has sexual longings for Veda undercuts the tension and appears like a cheap anchovy thrown into an already over-rich stew.

Ms. Winslet struggles to deliver her usual tour-de-force performance in this psychological doppelganger study of Mildred, the mother who obsessively clings to her bitch of a daughter, Veda, while climbing her ladder of success as a restaurateur. Kate Winslet's Mildred is too polite and refined to hold our interest in this tepid soap opera. The five-part series spends the first three on Mildred and Veda's complex relationship, which is three times too long in OHLand's opinion. Morgan Turner - spellbinding as the young Veda – is a tough act to follow. It's too bad that Evan Rachel Wood had to be the one to step into the adult Veda's shoes, because she often looks silly, like a little girl caught wearing mommy's makeup. A wiser choice for this pivotal role would have been the smooth, kitty-cat Daveigh Chase, from HBO's "Big Love" mini-series. Guy Pearce, as Monty, the faded Pasadena playboy, comes off as a smarmy schoolboy with a bad haircut. Mark Strong, of "Robin Hood" fame, seems the most logical choice to bite into this juicy character. In using "name" stars like Wood and Pearce, HBO settled for the bottom-line instead of making bolder casting choices to strengthened their lengthy treatment and Ms. Winslet's dramatic efforts. Brian F. O'Byrne does what he can with the lackluster character of Bert, Mildred's tiresome husband. Melissa Leo as the straight-talking Lucy, Mildred's friend and confidant and James LeGros, as Wally, the Pierce's friendly neighborhood conman, deftly bring new life to these memorable supporting characters.

Kudos goes to award-winning costume designer Ann Roth and the entire Mildred Pierce 2011 wardrobe department, who succeeds in recreating the faded classic feel of the period with timeless colors, simple cuts, and rich pattern work.

Perhaps we're just too used to the tough-as-nails Crawford version, with its dramatic music, noir-ish moodiness, and sensational murder – all in 111 minutes! Naw…what captivates us is the snarling dialogue between Crawford as Mildred and Ann Blyth's Veda and that ferocious slap-out on the staircase. Trying to remake something that's already a great masterpiece is really a waste of time, because as we all know, a masterpiece is a timeless creation.

Duh, HBO!

Outsourced (2010–2011)

A Celebration of Diversity - for NBC?

[28 September 2011]

While I'm against outsourcing by Big Business, I must confess that I loved this show. NBC snagged me at screen-side while with this charming cast of Ben Rappaport, Rizwan Manji, Sacha Dhawan, Rebecca Hazlewood, Parvesh Cheena, Anisha Nagarajan, Diedrich Bader and Pippa Black (our Aussie poor girl Nicole Kidman), who portray the different facets of the Indian working-class and their non-Indian counterparts.

"Outsourced" highlights the misconceptions that staff and management hold when East and West meet at Mid-America Novelties in India. And while it's not all PC (thank you!), it's good to see a genuine multi-cultural cast, rather than the token Asian or African-American tacked onto the cast credits. I'm usually not a big fan of the station, but Gupta's chatty talk, Manmeet's wonder at American dating customs, Todd's confusion about local customs, and Charlie, his bluff-and-bluster friend, prove that opposites do attract. I applaud NBC for taking this small but vital step towards this meaningful celebration of cultural diversity.

It's a shame that NBC chose to cancel this little diamond in the rough, in favor of the usual Primetime Pablum.

Food, Inc. (2008)

Big Business Serves Up Unpleasant Truths

[28 September 2011]

Winner of three awards, Food, INC, follows in the footsteps of Fast Food Nation and Super Size Me, exposing the underbelly of the beast that is the Big Food Business. Director Robert Kenner draws several key distinctions about how food is massed produced in America.

Big Food Business's assembly-line approach to farming has changed not only the way farming is conducted but also controls the diet of America as a result. Producer of Farmaggedon and American Meat, Joel Salatin sums up the dilemma facing today's farmer, who has traded control of their own farming business just to stay afloat.

"A culture that just uses a pig as a pile of protoplasmic inanimate structure, to be manipulated by whatever creative design the human can foist on that critter, will probably view individuals within its community, and other cultures in the community of nations, with the same type of disdain and disrespect and controlling type mentalities." As a result, large food companies like Purdue, Cargill, and Monsanto keep American farmers on a short lease, depriving them of even the most basic of entrepreneurial rights enjoyed by all American business-owners – that of freedom on how to run their own business.

This shifting from quality to quantity has Americans suffering from more type 2 Diabetes, cancer, hypertension, obesity, and sudden death from an ever increasing array of scientific assaults on farm animals and crops.

Author Michael Pollan sadly notes that: "There are no seasons in the American supermarket. Now there are tomatoes all year round, grown halfway around the world, picked when it was green, and ripened with ethylene gas. Although it looks like a tomato, it's kind of a notional tomato. I mean, it's the idea of a tomato." The one bright light in this tale of culinary woe is rise of the small independent organic farmer and the organic food movement's progression from small health-food stores mainstreaming into the larger food store chains. Food Inc. follows a popular organic yogurt and its successful migration onto Wal-Mart store shelves.

A "must see" for everyone on the planet who cares about what they eat!

Did You Hear About the Morgans? (2009)

Half-Baked Disaster

[28 September 2011]

This month's movie fortune cookie says, "Transition from directing a television series to feature film proves challenging."

Sadly, Marc Lawerence, director of the "Family Ties" sitcom hit, hasn't read his fortune yet. I'm pretty sure that Mr. Lawerence sat too long at his laptop, writing the half-baked disaster that is now known for all time as "Did You Hear About the Morgans?"

A sorry retread of 1997's "For Richer or Poorer", where a successful yet estranged New York couple must take it on the lam to protect life and limb while sniping at each other every step of the way in Any Hicksville, USA. Only here scriptwriter and director Lawerence decides to make the high maintenance couple dive for safety into the FBI's Witness Protection Program.

The story follows Paul and Meryl Morgan, a workaholic duo who find solace in their Blackberry phones and frantic lifestyle while ignoring their growing emotional separation. Meryl is simmering just this side of hatred because of Paul's half-hearted attempt at cheating, while harboring her own secret encounter. Hugh Grant has played a lovable hapless boy-man for so long that it now even looks to the audience like he's on auto pilot. Sarah Jessica Parker proves the point that she really needs to get back on a hit television show – quick, fast, and in a hurry.

But I can't heap the main pile of manure onto these two screen veterans. The words and direction come from Marc Lawerence, who's guilty of directing Hugh Grant in two other movies, "Two Weeks Notice" and "Music and Lyrics". The rock-bottom low occurred when Parker woodenly babbled Shakespeare's Love Sonnet 116 to a starry night and confused-looking Grant.

Did I say half-baked? Where did this director think Ms. Parker could take such high-brow dialog? Perhaps Mr. Lawerence had an ax to grind with the actress, who was so perfect in the little gem that was "State and Main", now reduced to Miscast Hell in this zero reel of a movie.

Director Marc Lawerence also proves the tired truth that when in doubt, just make fun of rural Americans in order to sell a script. He intersperses his tired dialog with even more boring one-liners about hunting, Sarah Palin, the southern diet, and the IQ of small-town folk. (Gee, didn't we see this in "For Richer or Poorer", too?) Of course, common sense Wyoming natives teach the Morgans a lesson in love and loyalty, not to mention training Meryl in the ways of wielding a rifle.

Sam Elliot and Mary Steenburgen fruitlessly struggle to play their cut-out characters without appearing too embarrassed. Yet, the only glimmer of humor comes during the too-short scenes between Elizabeth Moss and Jesse Liebman, as the frazzled yet devoted assistants to the Morgans. Seeing more of this sparkling duo could've raised the movie's over-all audience appeal.

Read the damn fortune, Marc!

Spread (2009)

I Smell Flopsweat!

[28 September 2011]

Sometimes Hollywood stars need to know their place on the walk of fame. A few stars - like Tom Hanks and Bruce Willis, seem to make the transition from the small screen to the large blockbusters in one effortless bounce. It's almost as if their personas are too big to be contained in a TV sitcom, and need the silver screen to blossom and grow. Others - like Ashton Kutcher - should be happily entertaining us on the small screen, where we can appreciate his quirky - yet limited - talents.

"Spread" proves that Ashton's skills just get lost once he wandered away from a TV sound stage. This movie is driven neither by tightly constructed plot or nor believable character development. And so sadly, we're reminded again that marginal B-list stars like Ashton Kutcher have to make a living, too.

Starring Ashton Kutcher and Anne Heche, this movie vainly attempts to tell the story of a small-time west coast hustler, who imagines himself more successful than he actually is, in the harsh reality light bulb that is LA. Kutcher plays Nikki, who introduces himself with this voice over narration during a three + minute long take. (What male uses the female spelling for his first name?) "My whole life it was obvious I was going to end up in this city. I don't want to be arrogant here, but I'm an incredibly attractive man. I can't help it, I don't try to be, I just am. When I was a kid my mother's best friend used to tell me that I was gonna be a little heart breaker. Turns out she was right. Her husband came home from work one day and found us f*#kin' on the Stairmaster. Los Angeles, California - that's where all the beautiful little heart breakers go to live the dream. 30,000 of them arrive here every single month. 30,000 prom kings and queens, and Little Miss Cute Tits every one of them with stars in their eyes and a dream in their heart. When I first came out here, I had a dream - a dream of an easy life. I was gonna get rich from lyin' around having my picture taken. I was gonna live in the hills and drive a noisy yellow sports car and f*ck 6' girls who weighed 89 lbs. Guess what? Most of it came true." Is it surprising that it's all downhill from here? Kutcher is unconvincing as the LA hustler of wealthy women, since he obviously doesn't have anything to show for it. He picks up a woman, plays lounge lizard for a while, and then gets kicked out or – get this - he leaves! What successful hustler is going to walk out on makeup sex - at night - with only a third grade knapsack to show for it? Nikki spends 70% of his time playing couch potato at Samantha's (Anne Heche) upscale LA home and another 10% of the time playing Kama Sutra around her palatial digs while she whines about how badly he's treating her. And I do mean whines. . .shudder. The other 20% is spent in circular arguments with his dauntless friend, Harry, played by Sebastian Stan. Harry, in turn, lectures Nikki nonstop, with feminist phrases like "objectifying women" – no, seriously! – as Nikki vainly chases Heather, (Margarita Levieva) a small-time hustler who ultimately beats him at his own tired game.

This film gets Mr. Kutcher one nod for a sad little moment in a hotel room, where he hopelessly attempts to connect with someone, via a voice message.

But this reviewer is snatching back our one nod because of a sick final scene, involving a frog and a live mouse – and we wonder just who in Hades paid off PETA?

Boardwalk Empire (2010–2014)

HBO's Gangster Stinker

[28 September 2011]

The bally-hoo surrounding Boardwalk Empire can't hide that this HBO stinker - well - stinks. HBO, the cable giant that is usually so good at historically-driven mini series, falls flat with this over-blown and over-done gangster mish-mash - all thanks to its director - Martin Scorsese.

His gangster treatment lacks the fire-in-the-belly that's needed for sustained action and character development, despite the ginned-up dialog and melodramatic violence. Boardwalk Empire is a feature film that is scaled down for the small screen, and Mr. Scorsese's big screen reputation just doesn't translate well in the smaller medium.

Don't get me wrong - I love Steve Buscemi and Michael Pitt - but if I miss an episode I don't care. And that's the real problem - Buscemi's role is the only well-developed of the cast - all the others smack of cardboard characters – including Kelly Macdonald, Michael Shannon, Shea Whigham, Stephen Graham, and Michael Kenneth Williams. They woodenly deliver their lines and send meaningful glances that go nowhere and it's frustrating to see Michael Pitt of Indie fame boxed into Scorsese's narrow viewfinder. The exceptions are Gretchen Mol as Jimmy's mother, Gillian and Jack Huston as Jimmy's sharp-shooting pal Richard, who both manage to command attention when on screen.

Brassed Off (1996)

A Peter Postlehwaite Favorite

[28 September 2011]

For any American worker who may be feeling a bit under-appreciated – relax! No one does working-class anger and analysis like our British cousins from across the sea.

Brassed Off takes place in Grimley, a small mining village in Worchestershire, England, threatened by the possibility of their mine closing. Tara Fitzgerald plays Gloria Mullen, a surveyor for the Grimley Mining Company, whose job is to create a study that she thinks will keep Grimley open and save jobs.

"My figures show Grimley has a future. It's a profitable pit," she tells Andy, her friend, fellow band member, and old flame. Ewan MacGregor, as Andy Barrow, is one hard realist who schools her in the ways of management's shady plans over coffee one night.

"You're report means as much to them as we do. . . bugger all. . . And those good eggs at the head office think they've done all they can. Oh dear. . . they've been very fair, very reasonable. Done their best, done their sums and - oh dear - they just don't add up! They'll have to close another pit – a shame – and they probably made their decision why you were still in college."

Gloria can't understand why Andy will vote to keep the mine open then, if the majority of miners will be voting for "redundancy" - to close the mine and take a buy-out.

"No hope – just principles", he replies.

Amid the backdrop of this drama, Gloria and Andy's budding relationship suffers a few bumps and bruises along the way. A few of the more vocal Grimley Colliery Brass Band members accuse Andy of being a scab and Gloria a management sellout until almost the bitter end. The film intersperses strike scenes and family crisis's with rousing band numbers, as they practice for a musical competition.

The late – and great – Peter Postlethwaite, portrays Danny, the orchestra's leader – in good times and bad. The musical numbers represent the spirit of the town as the villagers grapple with their pressure and problems. He encourages the band members to keep going, no matter what, even if it means the further deterioration of his own poor health. Danny believes that the band can win fist prize, which symbolizes their collective spirit - undaunted and unbowed.

During her viability study report to management, Gloria discovers that Andy's predictions are all-too accurate, right down to the timing of their decision to close Grimley. Gloria discovers that she too has principles and resigns her cushy position, which ultimately enables the band to travel to the band finals at Albert Hall.

The band plays on, all the way to Albert Hall, even though many of the members are cynical and demoralized, knowing that their lives will be forever changed as a result of management's callous actions. And although Grimley closes, Danny and Gloria are able to rally the Grimley Brass Banders to play their hearts out in London at the National Band Competition, winning first place.

Danny: ". . .over the last ten years, this bloody government has systematically destroyed an entire industry. OUR industry. And not just our industry - our communities, our homes, our lives. All in the name of "progress". And for a few lousy bob. I'll tell you something else you might not know, as well. A fortnight ago, this band's pit were closed - another thousand men lost their jobs. And that's not all they lost. Most of them lost the will to win a while ago. A few of them even lost the will to fight. But when it comes to losing the will to live, to breathe, the point is - if this lot were seals or whales, you'd all be up in bloody arms. But their not, are they, no, no they're not. They're just ordinary common-or-garden honest, decent human beings. And not one of them with an ounce of bloody hope left. Oh aye, they can knock out a bloody good tune. But what the f*#k does that matter? And now I'm going to take my boys out onto the town. Thank you."

See what I mean?

Lady Scarface (1941)

Early Judith Anderson Gem

[28 September 2011]

Sometimes pre-war movie propaganda can take a strange turn, when they surface decades later. Lady Scarface, starring veteran actress Judith Anderson, as Slade, (long before she was tapped as a real "Dame"), gives us a tough female gangster boss, who rules with an iron fist over her small posse of cheap crimesters.

This movie, directed by Frank Woodruff, spins a tale of murder and mayhem, bringing Dennis O'Keefe (Lt. Bill Mason) and Frances Neal (Ann), together as the cutie-pie couple who bring down Slade and her crew with surprising wit and affection.

This film was clearly made to send the message that women should "toughen up", and be strong - especially in the face of approaching war. Writers Arnaud d'Usseau and Richard Collins, focus on juxtaposing newspaper reporter Ann and crime queen Slade. Ann is much braver and more honest than our hero cop, Bill, and she literally saves the day. Slade, for all of her ruthless nature, spends most of her time trapped – like a wild animal - in a tiny claustrophobic hotel room, pacing about and tersely snapping orders to her male minions. Like many women of the period who stayed home, Slade comes off weaker than her plucky female counterpart, Ann, who freely moves about the city to gather clues and get her woman (so to speak). A strange pairing, indeed!

Lady Scarface is a rare prize found among the TCM film archives, so enjoy it the next time it comes to late-night TV.

Don Juan (1926)

A Sizzling Silent Classic!

[28 September 2011]

Released in 1927, this silent classic stars the iconic John Barrymore as the legendary lover and Mary Astor as the lithe and lovely Adriana. Set against the power struggles and intrigue of the House of Borgia's, Don Juan romps about, setting all female hearts aflutter. With his faithful servant, Pedrillo, keeping a tight daily schedule, Don Juan manages to fit in a handful of willing lovers throughout the day.

The film opens on the Don as a young boy, who witnesses his mother's infidelity and his father's wrath. This episode in Don Juan's early life causes him to view women with little trust, and he seems hell bent in proving to himself that all women are easily won with the right pick-up line.

Of course, the virtuous Adriana finally cracks the Don's crusty exterior and he becomes a believer in true love - but not without a stirring fight scene, poisonings, and 191 kisses! A fine supporting cast of Warner Oland, Estelle Taylor, Montagu Love, Myrna Loy, and Willard Louis, together with the experienced direction of Alan Crosland (The Jazz Singer) makes Don Juan a great viewing treat for all cinefile fans.

Known as the "Great Profile", John Barrymore's famous face gets displayed to its greatest advantage in one of his most popular film roles. The Barrymore name is part of a family dynasty reaching back four generations, to include stage and film stars such as Lionel, Ethel, and current film star Drew Barrymore.

(John's last words on his deathbed) "Die? I should say not, dear fellow. No Barrymore would allow such a conventional thing to happen to him." Mary Astor's Oscar-winning career spanned almost fifty years of silent and talking films. Perhaps best known today for her work as Brigid O'Shaughnessy in John Huston's The Maltese Falcon with Humphrey Bogart and her Academy Award role in The Great Lie, her Adriana opposite Don Juan was the coveted screen pairing of the decade.

Mary was never a romantic when it came to her career, however. Of it, she said, "There are five stages in the life of an actor: Who's Mary Astor? Get me Mary Astor. Get me a Mary Astor Type. Get me a young Mary Astor. Who's Mary Astor?" Luckily, we have Don Juan to fully appreciate her, yet again, via late night screenings.

Hamlet (2009 TV Movie)

Hamlet Fans - Take Notice!

[28 September 2011]

For American audiences who love Shakespeare (an oxymoron at best!) and Harry Potter, the casting of David Tennant as Hamlet is an intriguing one. Tennant, who is wildly popular in the UK in the Doctor Who series, is also known to fans across the Isles as Barty Crouch Jr. from Harry Potter fantasy franchise.

Pairing David Tennant with Patrick Stewart, who is a double foil as both the slain ghost king father and Hamlet's uncle Claudius is masterful casting in this version from the Royal Shakespearean Company. As a result, Stewart was nominated for an Emmy as Best Supporting Actor.

Besides this quirky casting choice, director Gregory Doran propels this oft-told tale through the tone and inflection that each character brings to the all too familiar silted language of the Bard. One could easily close their eyes and simply bask in the joy of the rise and fall of phrases and words spun into this delightful audio experience.

Yet another pleasure is watching Sir Patrick Stewart literally play against himself - mano y mano - as Hamlet's mournful ethereal specter and the greedy, selfish brother. Pennie Downie, Mariah Gale, and Oliver Ford Davies provide an excellent counter-point to the brash and bold Tennant/Steward duo.

This is a fine minimalist production that should be added to any Hamlet FANatic's collection.

Inception (2010)

Challenging Our Cinematic Sensibilities

[28 September 2011]

Inception proves the point that a Hollywood film can move beyond mere entertainment and challenge the viewer to wonder "what the f*#^ is this all about?" One can't argue that the cinematic medium makes passive audiences of us all. Countless movies – comedies, dramas, westerns – you name it, we viewers plop into our seats, chomp popcorn while the action unfolds and carries us to the rolling credits, snapping us out of our trance. Christopher Nolan's tour-de-force isn't your usual heist film. Sure, some of the elements are there – an international group of thieves, the Job, and a ticking clock deadline. After that, it's a whole different type of film altogether. Described as a "sci-fi heist thriller", Inception demands a lot more than blink-blink, chomp-chomp. The drive-by summary is: The Job - Cracking into a grieving energy mogul's (Robert Fischer, played by Cillian Murphy) unconscious mind to plant an idea.

The Thieves - Led by guilt-ridden Dom Cobb (DiCaprio), the Team swells to include point man Arthur (Joseph Gordon-Levitt), architect Ariadne (Ellen Page), chemist Yusuf (Dileep Rao), forger Eames (Tom Hardy), and mega-rich client Saito (Ken Watanabe). They must share a drug-induced dream down three levels, something that hasn't been done. Each member of the team – except Saito and the sleeping Fischer – carries a totem, a special item that reminds them they're in a dreaming state.

The Ticking Clock Deadline – Extraction, the act of removing ideas from someone's mind, is the standard practice among the world of corporate espionage that Cobb inhabits. This two-level process requires the Architect to build a complex world of mazes that the team can move about in freely, as the team descends deeper into the levels of shared dreaming. The Chemist provides the powerful sedatives as the Point Man keeps track of the "kicks" meant to move closer to the waking state. A Forger can replicate into someone else, for the purpose of misleading the potential victim. Inception – the job that Mr. Saito is paying for – requires the team to enter a third level, which is considered a risky and unstable realm to control.

Are you still with me? What moves Inception beyond the Sci-Fi heist genre is the underlying dramatic obstacle that threatens to engulf Cobb into a permanent fourth level of sustained madness, along with his late wife, Mal (Marion Cotillard) – and puts the entire team into harm's way. One aspect of this "dream-within-a-dream" environment is that injury can occur, which awakens the participants, but death is the "risky factor" in a third level. Cobb – on the run after being blamed for Mal's death - agrees to the job after Saito promises to clear his name, so he can return home to his waiting children as a free man.

The puzzle for Cobb is that he uses his free time to enter a fourth level of dream state because it seems more real than his life without Mal. When is he awake? Is it when he's dreaming? Cobb's subconscious longings and obsessive day-dreaming allows Mal to freely wander into the job, as a seductive wild card that endangers the entire assignment at every level. Ariadne's task is compounded as Cobb looks to her for guidance to sort through the complex network of sorrow and desperation, while seeking to bring the job to a successful conclusion.

This reviewer loves this film so much, simply because Inception dares the audience to fully consider this multi-dimensional experience. The only drawbacks are the casting of Marion Cotillard as Mal and Leonardo DiCaprio's occasional over-acting. Ms. Cotillard's constant refrain of "you promised…" begins to detract from her otherwise adequate performance after the third time. It wouldn't grate on our nerves if she had varied her delivery just a bit. As for DiCaprio – after almost 22 years of experience he still has a problem with key scenes that demand intense emotion. Hanging out of a window, melodramatically screaming "Oh my God, no!" leaves one wondering why this otherwise gifted actor can't move beyond such overblown histrionics.

It took nine years of film experience and research for Christopher Nolan (The Dark Knight, Memento, The Prestige) to bring his ideas about lucid dreaming to life as Inception. The film takes place across England, France, Tokyo, Tangiers, Los Angeles, and Canada, as the Team races to the heart-hammering finish. Nolan's film boasts a flawless musical score, countless special effects and elaborate sets, not to mention a script that demands the viewer see the film at least twice to truly relish this unique cinematic creation. While such ho-hum movies like The Social Network may scoop up awards this year, rest assured that Inception will be viewed, imitated, and written about for decades to come.

Cousin Bette (1998)

Genteel Carnage Among the Upper Crust

[28 September 2011]

Most costume dramas about a poor relation follow a similar trail: The poor one, filled with high expectations and good intentions, gets the money and true love by suffering through a series of pitfalls, only to be winking at the audience by the ending credits. Our Cousin Bette gets there, but she chooses another road, perhaps more hazardous, but infinitely more entertaining for us.

This fascinating tale is about a relative who is treated poorly by everyone in her aristocratic family, while they themselves live in debt, denial, and high fashion. Jessica Lange plays the title character with a cynical smirk, as though she's daring every one to call her out, yet she knows – only too well - that people are so consumed by their own personal dramas that they ignore the fine details.

Described as "the bad seed who refused to blossom", Bette is the sister of Adeline, who languidly takes her time dying, while instructing her spinster sibling as to what flowers to lay on her casket. One look at the two – Adeline in her death-bed finery and Bette, in a basic drab dress, devoid of any adornment – and it's all too evident where the balance of power resides.

Bette: (to Jenny) "How could you know? You don't know who I was sacrificed to – to Adeline. They slapped me and caressed her. I went dressed like a wretch and she like a fine lady. Adeline, the garden, peel the vegetables, Bette. She never lifted a finger except to tie her ribbons."

Describing herself as a "country peasant", Bette lives in the slums of Paris, working as a costume seamstress to the reigning burlesque star of the day, Jenny Cadine (played by Elizabeth Shue), who vainly shows off her derrière before every final curtain is rung down. Jenny puts off the ticking clock of time by enjoying the attentions of her many rich – and generous - admirers, yet one fateful day encounters her worst nightmare.

Jenny: "I'm 24…I may as well be dead."

Bette: "You were 24 years old yesterday and it didn't seem to bother you then."

Jenny: "Today, while I was walking in the park, I came across a hideous old woman, face swollen and scratched; she stank of stale wine and sweat. In her filthy tresses she had placed a beauty patch, one red camellia I knew at once who she was - she was known as Carabine, the most famous courtesan in Paris. Everyone envied her dazzling shoulders, her milky skin. She had a neck so smooth it might have been turned on a lathe. Her trademark was a red beauty patch, a red camellia."

'Carabine? Is that you?', I asked.

'No, there is no Carabine, she has left me.'

Originally a novel by French author, Honore de Balzac, this modern version boasts an international cast of talent. Bob Hoskins (Cesar Crevel), Hugh Laurie (Baron Hector Hulot), Aden Young (Wenceslas), Kelly Macdonald (Hortense Hulot), and Geraldine Chaplin (Adeline Hulot) all twist and turn in time to Bette's song of vengeance. Set in Paris, during the pre-revolutionary period of 1846, screenwriters Seifert and Tarr turn Balzac's morality tale into a microcosm of the class resentments barely simmering just beneath the pearls and petticoats of Bette's shadow world. Yet she's nothing if not flexible, as she revises her best-laid plans in the face of cross and double-cross by family and high society associates alike.

Bette: "I'll see them – all of them – in the dust! We're both daughters of the soil, and blood of the voge, and do you trust me, as a sister?"

Jenny: "Yes…"

Bette: "And will you help me, as you would a sister?"

Jenny: "Yes…"

Bette: "Then you will be the ax and I'll be the hand that wields it."

Surrounded by people with their own notions of power, Bette plays nonstop Powernoply until she wins all, while the French Revolution rages. She's able to play upon the passions of her tormentors and deftly manages to wreck her subtle brand of ruthless revenge upon one and all, causing adultery, a duel, physical illness, embezzlement, financial ruin, imprisonment in the Bastille, and a crime of passion - all of which sees her contentedly sewing in the grand house, dressed in her own silken finery, cooing to a child who's the product of this genteel carnage.

Black Swan (2010)

Rediscovering Natalie Portman

[28 September 2011]

The world of ballet is usually low on the shelf when Hollywood producers are looking for a script to bring to life. Perhaps it's all those frilly tutus and tights or maybe it's the anorexic females and effeminate males prancing about on their toes. How can one craft a drama about a world that lends itself more to an effete form of entertainment that only a 250,000 k intellectual can love? The only two ballet-themed movies that are worth remembering are "The Red Shoes", with Moria Shearer, made in 1948 and "The Turning Point", in 1977, featuring Shirley MacLaine and Anne Bancroft. Both stories dealt with the difficulty women have trying to balance their dancing career with a satisfying private life. See? Today's modern sensibilities make it impossible to drum up an ounce of interest in a woman having a career crisis on pointe shoes.

Well, screen writers Andres Heinz, Mark Heyman, and John J. McLaughlin have discovered how to mine the ballet drama for all it's worth, bringing the ballet world out of mothballs and into the mainstream audience's attention. After all, if sex sells and thrillers pack the house, then why not blend the two into an award-winning film? Billed as a "psychosexual thriller", Black Swan, starring Natalie Portman in the title role, is a claustrophobic study of a young woman's descent into paranoia and madness. Nina Sayers, a professional ballerina, struggles through a life that is narrowly defined by the demands of her craft with endless hours of practice, daily rehearsals, scant meals, egoistical instructors, and dreaming of the coveted lead role as prima ballerina in Swan Lake.

Nina's world stifles her at every turn as she pours all of her tamed emotions into her dancing. The driving passion for Nina is perfecting her already pitch-perfect moves. While the other dancers maintain outside interests and friendships, Nina prefers to isolate herself with her self-induced rigid schedule. Even during her few hours of rest, she chooses stuffed animals - relics from her childhood – to sooth her nerves, as she falls asleep to her ballerina music box, that of course, dances to the refrain from Swan Lake.

Nina lives with her over-protective mother Erica (Barbara Hershey), a former ballerina who chose family over her career, and never let's an opportunity – or a discussion – go by without bringing it up.

Erica: Has he tried anything with you? He has a reputation. I have a right to be concerned, Nina. You've been staying late so many nights rehearsing. I hope he isn't taking advantage.

Nina: He's not.

Erica: Good. I just don't want you to make the same mistake I did.

Nina: Thanks.

Erica: Not like that. I just mean as far as my career was concerned.

Nina: What career? Erica: The one I gave up to have you.

Nina: You were 28 and only in—(stops) Erica: Only what? Nina: Nothing.

Erica: What! Nina: Nothing.

Mother and daughter both obsess over the upcoming Swan Lake audition, commandeered by Thomas (Vincent Cassel), the head instructor. Thomas clearly enjoys playing everyone in his dance troupe against one another, tapping half of the auditioning class on their shoulders and then announcing to the remaining dejected applicants (including Nina), that they are in fact the ones who made the casting cut. When Nina gets the lead role, Thomas begins feeding her a steady diet of his sexually-charged ridicule, goading her into shedding her inhibitions for a superior performance – and into his bed.

Thomas: I got a little homework assignment for you. Go home and touch yourself. Live a little.

As her mother frets, Nina grimly tries to ignore Lily (Mila Kunis), an ambition dancer who's nipping at her heels for the chance to step into Nina's tired shoes.

Thomas: What's going on? Nina: (crying) Lily! You made her my alternate? Thomas: Well there's always an alternate. Lily is the best choice.

Nina: No, but she wants my role.

Thomas: Every dancer in the world wants your role.

Nina: No, this is different. She's after me. She's trying to replace me! Thomas: Nobody's after you.

Nina: (crying harder) No, please believe me! The twin elements of violence and sexuality in "Black Swan" aren't gratuitous by any means, but organically grow as Nina is forced to confront her fears and desires as an adult woman. Natalie Portman skillfully balances between a demanding array of emotional shifts all the way until her final curtain call. Ms. Portman's outstanding performance proves she deserved to dance away with our boy Oscar. Bravo!

Pandora's Box (1929)

A Cautionary Tale?

[28 September 2011]

One person's classic film experience is another's cautionary tale, and even more so when it comes to George W. Pabst's silent film masterpiece and morality conundrum, Pandora's Box. For over eight decades, film reviewers have written reams about the sordid tale of sad wanton Lulu, living her life of hedonism, which spirals towards its inevitable tragic end. What is remarkable about this 1929 German classic is that it not only stars American film bad girl Louise Brooks, but that its anti-Semitic innuendos have been ignored by audiences and film critics alike.

Fired from Paramount over a salary feud, Louise Brooks, of bobbed-hair fame, turned up her nose at the studio giant and went off to Germany and cinematic immortality. There's artistry in every movement of Ms. Brook's Lulu and she appears in almost every scene of this 133 minute restored film. It's difficult to portray a successful prostitute, murderer, and bisexual playgirl--- and make the audience love you in the process – especially in the 1930s! It was customary during the 1920s to cast the flapper as a fallen woman, partly as a warning to women who were already straining at the bit to define their own empowerment amid the changing times. By the ending credits, our flapper would either give up her wild ways, the man she loved, or die. One reason Pandora's Box still holds up today is because she brings a modern effortless style to her Lulu, when such authenticity was absent from most silent films. It's a testimony to this finely-tuned skill, that Louise Brooks is still able to command our attention almost a century later.

Another factor is the brilliant cinematography of Gunther Krampf, who bathes Lulu in warm seductive whites during the first half of the story. As Lulu's world begins to unravel, he envelopes her in increasingly somber hues of gray and finally, black.

The plot is your standard fallen-girl-with-a-heart-of-gold, who uses everyone and then gets abused as her fortunes turn sour until the bitter end. It's painful to watch Lulu as she vainly flits from one selfish person to another in her aimless search for self-destruction. We find ourselves hoping, right along with Lulu, that people will inherently be as good as they pretend - or delude - themselves into thinking that they really are. Her decision not to charge her pick-up - the man who delivers her death - is the final tragic irony, and as the candle flickers weakly, we wonder if she, too, understood it.

Pandora's Box comes from an ancient Greek tale of the goddess Pandora, whose curiosity opened a box of evil upon the world. German dramatist, Frank Wedekind, wrote two short plays, Earth Spirit and Pandora's Box, that were known as the "Lulu plays", and were usually produced as one set piece. Lulu's world boils down to the narrow confines of her lifestyle choices, which are dependent on men's generosity and their predictable consequences. Wedekind saw Lulu as a free spirit falling victim to the selfish nature of Man, something that pleased the German Expressionists but failed to impress the censors on both sides of the Atlantic.

Pandora's Box begins in Lulu's apartment, where two elements emerge: The first is the camera's eye, moving over Lulu's living room, quickly sweeping past a menorah sitting on a table. Such a bold reference marks Lulu as Jewish, and that knowledge is paired with the appearance of Schigolch (Carl Goetz), Lulu's former pimp – who she treats as a surrogate father, "Papa Brommer". Schigolch is the evil that returns to wreck havoc on Lulu, and his facial features suggests that he is semitic. Pabst spares no small effort to make Schigolch appear amoral, greedy, and dirty; someone who is content to wallow in his own filth and brazenly takes money from Lulu's purse as she watches – but does nothing. During the pre-war period, such anti-semitic precepts were beginning to find their way into the common forms of enculturation – the universities, mass media, and the creative arts – and would become fully realized by the mid 1930s. In these few moments then, Lulu becomes realized as a female version of the Golem – a moronic monster from a 1920 movie of the same name – who creates havoc with her frenzied sexuality upon the helpless male (Christian) population. Such subtle distortion might suggest that Pabst's interpretative tale of woe goes far beyond playwright Frank Wedekind's reflective Lulu stories.

If one can attribute an auteur approach from Austrian director George Pabst – what exactly was he trying to say? Was he a racist, warning the German world of the evils of the Jewish people? Or was he a spectator on the world's stage, telling us that things – and people - were not what they might seem? Knowing that Pabst himself came back to Germany to make films for the Third Reich only serves to confirm that Pandora's Box was his own "message" film with a few strings attached.

When Lulu dies at the hands of a serial killer, tired and only too willing to perish, the question arises whether Pabst was also – on an unconscious level - attempting to warn Jewish audiences about the dangers of passivity. No other semitic references are made in Pandora's Box, and it's puzzling how many viewers have failed – on a conscious level – to pick up on these subtle puzzle-pieces that make up this notable film. Maybe this also is a testimony to the talents of Ms. Brooks and the skills of G. W. Pabst. Yet film critics have ignored these aspects, too, perhaps because to address them means negating a film that is considered a cinematic milestone, much like D.W. Griffith's Birth of a Nation. To truly open G. W. Pabst's Pandora's Box means we might just discover another classy piece of propaganda from a closeted anti-semitic artiste.

Note: Visit OutsideHollywoodland.com to view complete review.

Caramel (2007)

A Sweet Treat

[8/10 · 3 February 2010]

The prologue to Nadine Labaki's Caramel finely-crafted film underlines the point that it takes a lot to shape a woman's character. Taking place around a table, several women are playfully cooking and eating a batch of warm, amber-colored caramel. Some of the sugared paste is also being stored into jars to use for hair removal in their shop.

Caramel's tale of friendship and love, set in the Middle East, can easily strike a universal chord in every woman. Nadine Labaki's directorial debut takes that warmth to weave a tale of sisterhood involving six Lebanese women who laugh, cry, and celebrate life in a beauty parlor called Si Belle.

Situated in on a busy Beirut street, Si Belle stands out, not for it's lack of a glamorous façade, but because the letter B in the storefront's sign is literally hanging on by a neon thread. This pretty much describes where our six heroines are at the beginning of their story.

Layale literally flies off to meet her lover, a married man, in the middle of client's coiffures, leaving them astounded and her co-workers frazzled. Youssef, a traffic cop, watches her flight with a wishing heart. Nisrine is engaged and fretting that her fiancée will discover on their wedding night that someone else got there first. Rima, the shampoo girl, wistfully sighs and shares stolen glances with a beautiful customer. Jamale, a frequent customer and good friend, stubbornly refuses to acknowledge her retreating youth, by continuing to audition for acting roles meant for fresher faces. And Rose looks after her sister Lili, retreating further into her tiny tailor shop as life passes her by.

The ensemble cast delivers a fine set of performances, as Labaki gently coaxes her cast to the finish line, through a series of long shots and polite close-ups. Laure Gardette's editing is a bit choppy, yet is forgotten while Khaled Mouzannar's playful musical score is playing. Amid the touch-ups and back-combing, laughter and sighs, Caramel reminds us that life's ups and downs are easier to bear with a sister close at hand.

The Janky Promoters (2009)

Bad to the Bone

[2/10 · 3 February 2010]

I like Ice Cube - hell, everyone likes Ice Cube. Crossing over from the rap / hip hop music genre, this likable hardcore rapper surprised everyone by stepping into a promising film career that begun in the 1990s with Boyz n the Hood. A bankable actor, writer, director, and producer, who's specialized in snappy hip movies and predictable family fare, Ice Cube continues to make us wonder just what he'll do next.

This is one film that probably read much better in the early stages of creation. The Janky Promoters is so bad that one feels sorry for the cast – themselves all pretty much MIScast, who had to suffer through Marcus Raboy's tame direction and Cube's weak screenplay. Janky might have done better with the star behind the camera and some solid actors sprinkled among the novice cast.

And someone should tell executive producers Bob and Harvey Weinstein to stop profiling when casting movies with an urban setting and an African-American story. The Janky Promoters is replete with one stereotype after another, from the big-booty slut to the one-dimensional rapper Bow Wow parody. Enough already! Thankfully, many of Ice Cube's better moments can be rented, especially my favorite, the Friday trilogy. And it's nice to know that we can still look forward to other Cube experiences, hopefully chosen more wisely.

Drottningen och jag (2008)

A Revealing Documentary

[9/10 · 3 February 2010]

Released in the United States in June of this year, Iranian filmmaker, Nahid Persson Sarvestani, turns her lens on Queen Farah, the widow of the last Shah of Iran. This documentary poses the question – well, sorry, I couldn't understand what the premise was, because according to the film maker herself, the film "had a life of its own".

Sarvestani, a former communist sympathizer, escaped from Iran around the time the Ayatollah Khomeini took over leadership and established a theocracy after 2,500 years of monarchical rule in 1979. The story of her disillusionment in the new regime is reflected against her subject's genteel denial of the events that lead to her husband's eventual ouster.

Nahid and Queen Farah share thoughts and feelings about their separate paths that intertwine them for the duration of this engrossing documentary. Pain and sorrow reveal the skepticism of Nahid's memory of the Shah's oppressive rule and the graceful deflection of that harsh reality for Farah. Each woman – both sisters of Iran – symbolize the old and new that is modern Iran today. At one point during the filming, Nahid follows Farah through a dinner party, honoring the former Queen Farah as the undisputed Queen of Iran, among a group of fierce pro-Shah Loyalists.

"What am I doing here?", Nahid says to the camera – or maybe more to herself.

Through it all, what ends up uniting them is not ideology, but a simple mound of earth from their beloved Iranian homeland.

By the People: The Election of Barack Obama (2009)

A Waste of Hollywood Talent

[2/10 · 2 February 2010]

By the People: the Election of Barack Obama, released in 2009 shortly before the presidential election, falls somewhere in between political propaganda and an amateur film diary. Directed by Amy Rice and Alicia Sams, produced by actor Edward Norton, this HBO documentary presents a one-dimensional view of the 2008 presidential election between Barack Obama and John McCain.

Given that 98% of Hollywood is liberal, it was inevitable that a movie about Barack Obama would be made…but couldn't By the People at least be entertaining or enlightening? Apparently, Rice, Sams, and Norton, et al, didn't think so. With unlimited funds and talent at their disposal, People boils down to a tunnel view of the campaign, and its supporting cast of star-struck campaign workers, mainstream media, and huge crowds of enthusiasts.

At the forefront is Obama, who appears to play to the camera like a star-struck kid, enjoying every moment of the branding that is Mr. O. The "behind-the-scenes" glimpses are just as carefully staged as Candidate Obama's many appearances, staff conferences, and his off-hand comments such as, "I love elections, they're so much fun!". No – really! The film lacks any narrative style – and any narration, for that matter - and the audience is left to plow through almost two hours of wall-to-wall film footage of this sticky-sweet homage to the perfect Liberal candidate. Without showing the reality that goes into every political campaign or exploring Obama's crafted image, By the People comes off as a back-handed tribute to Leni Riefenstahl's Triumph of the Will's cinematic design.

A year later and OHLand can't help but wonder if Rice, Sams, and Norton, now well-tempered by time and stark reality, would package their product a bit differently.

Ah, being liberals, probably not.

Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood (2002)

A Warm Mint-Julep of a Flick

[7/10 · 2 February 2010]

Movies that feature "women-only" themes are few indeed and at any given time we can count their existence on one finger. Hollywood loves reminding us that "it's a man's world, baby" and I would hazard a guess that 95% of current box office offerings are male-centered (That is, male = hero, victim, anti-hero; with a female = smart talking' and lookin' and barely visible unless required to provide booty, tears, or encouragement to - you guessed it, the male!).

So when a movie with a female-centered cast and theme (trivialized by the term "chick flick") is served to us, I watch with a wary eye and a hopeful heart. Why? Because most chick flicks are written, directed, and produced by men...maybe that's why there are so few of them! To the credit of The Divine Secrets of The Ya-Ya Sisterhood, it didn't disappoint my heart or my head.

The Ya-Ya Sisterhood takes the universal theme of mother-daughter conflict and serves it up as refreshingly as a mint julep on a scorching day. Taking place in Louisiana, this movie leads us through a merry romp of friendship and fierce loyalties, stopping along the way to tug at our heart strings and drag out the tissues (don't all good chick flicks?).

The plot centers around a young director (Sandra Bullock) who is estranged from her Old School Southern Belle mother (Ellen Burstyn) and nervous about her upcoming nuptials. Through the "divine" intervention of the Ya-Ya's - a three woman tag-team of family friends - (played by Maggie Smith, Shirley Knight, and Fionnula Flanagan) the daughter is able to heal old familial wounds and welcome her new role as daughter, wife (and future mother).

Yet, layered within this beautiful film is three levels of female experience, told through the life of Maiden-Mother-Salty Sage women Burstyn and Ashley Judd. (I'd like to see Judd get a nod at the next award show for this multi-faceted role.) Add to that a funny and tender juxtaposition of the men in their lives (James Garner and Angus MacFadyen) and everyone is sure to get their Ya-Ya's out! Unforgettable in every way!

Gosford Park (2001)

A Disappointing Effort

[3/10 · 2 February 2010]

Altman meets Agatha Christie, with some pretty confusing results. Agatha Christie's mysteries were a finely honed balance between character development and plot detail—knowing just enough to care about discovering who the killer was and why he/she killed.

Unfortunately, Altman cares about neither aspect of story development here. There was a time when the mention of an Altman film gave me shivers of anticipation and excitement. Altman had crafted the ensemble cast concept into a visual delight - M*A*S*H and Nashville spring instantly to mind.

But, like the saying goes, all good things must come to an end and Gosford Park is definitely the end of Altman's creative spark. Altman proved that an ensemble cast of 15 people could be a rare confection indeed. Under his skillful control he was always aware of how a good plot and subtle character nuances could bring out the best in his characters—and hence the story.

Yet, like the greedy child in a candy store, Altman attempts to "go extreme" and serve up a mishmash ensemble cast that topples over at 30! Among the jumble of corridor scenes, kitchen scenes, and bedroom confessions are a few bright spots—Maggie Smith as a tired aristocrat with attitude, the too-inquisitive maid, and the bumbling, self-assured detective who hasn't a clue---for a change!

Another extreme was the pacing of the plot. Was it necessary to keep the pace at fast forward? A smaller cast and slower pace would have done much to save this lovely-looking film from pretentious posing.

The Ladies Man (2000)

A Player for All Seasons

[9/10 · 2 February 2010]

"What is love? What is this longing in our hearts for togetherness? Is it not the sweetest flower? Does not this flower of love have the fragrant aroma of fine, fine diamonds? Does not the wind love the dirt? Is not love not unlike the unlikely not it is unlikened to? Are you with someone tonight? Do not question your love. Take your lover by the hand. Release the power within yourself. Your heard me, release the power. Tame the wild cosmos with a whisper. Conquer heaven with one intimate caress. That's right don't be shy. Whip out everything you got and do it in the butt. By Leon Phelps" When Tim Meadows created his quintessential SNL playboy, Leon Phelps, I cringed. Hearing his smarmy lisp and salacious comments made my remote tremble with outrage. I employed the click feature more than once, dear readers.

So When the film version of "The Ladies Man" came on cable, I mumbled a few comments of my own and clicked yet again. But there comes the day, gray and forlorn, when "nothing is on" any of the 100+ channels...sigh. Yes – I was faced with every cable subscribers torment – watch it or turn my TV off! There he was, Leon Phelps, smirking and ...making me laugh! What had happened? Had I succumbed to Hollywood's 'dumb-down' sit-com humor? Was I that desperate to avoid abdicating my sacred throne? The truth of the matter is I like "The Ladies Man" more than I should. A story about a vulgar playboy sipping cognac while leering at every female form goes against my feminist sensibilities.

What began as a crude SNL skit blossomed before my eyes into a tale about Leon and his playboy philosophy, going through life "helping people" solve their sexual conflicts. "I am the Mother Teresa of Boning", he solemnly informs Julie (Karyn Parsons), his friend and long-suffering producer of his radio show, "The Ladies Man". And he's not kidding. Leaving a string of broken hearts and angry spirits, Leon manages to bed and breakfast just about all of Chicago. That he does so with such genuine good-will is his calling-card through life.

Our self-proclaimed, "Expert in the Ways of Love", manages to get himself into a lot of trouble with husbands and boyfriends. One such maligned spouse, Lance (Will Ferrell), forms a "Victims of the Smiling Ass, USA" club, vowing to catch our lovable Don Juan. "Oh yes, we will have our revenge", he croons to his cohorts, in a show-stopping dance number.

Plus it's such a total delight to see Billy Dee Williams as Lester, the tavern owner and smooth narrator of Leon's odyssey to find his "sweet thing" and a pile of cash. (Where has he been hiding?) But would I choose this movie as my Valentine's Day choice? Leon's search for the easy life changes him in so many profound ways - that I had to give the nod to our "Ladies Man". That he can, at the movie's close, find true happiness with one woman, while still offering his outlandish advice, is the stuff of dreams!

Legally Blonde (2001)

A Legally Cute Film

[8/10 · 2 February 2010]

I was ready - ready to hate this movie for its dumb blonde jokes, senseless humor and bad acting.

Instead, I found myself joining the ranks of Reese Witherspoon fans, marveling at the way she could take such weathered humor and make it something fresh. It was as though she were saying to us, "Look, at this bit of nonsense, and let's have some fun, and make a couple of important statements at the same time."

And fun we had. Actress and audience alike can appreciate that Legally Blond isn't going to win any awards, but Ms. Witherspoon and company work effortlessly to keep this film from becoming a haven for moronic one-liners and stupid sight gags.

Legally Blonde tells the story of Elle Woods, a Silicon Valley Girl and Sorority Queen who's twin goals in life consist of getting her man while looking FC (fashionably correct). Early in the movie, we get a glimpse of just how smart our blonde sister is, when a smug saleswoman attempts to sell her a shoddy knockoff at full price.

This is not a movie about a girl has guy, girl loses guy, and then girl wins him back at the final curtain. Instead, Blonde becomes a journey of a young woman who grows into a three-dimensional diva by exploring an unlikely career option in a foreign setting.

Our West Coast fashion maven heads east to win back her man by proving she can be smart enough to get a law degree (well, long enough to get him to say "I do"). West meets east with unpredictable results. In the course of about 90 minutes, our heroine manages to realize her ex-boyfriend is a joke, earn an internship, win a court case, and become valedictorian of her graduating class. Along the way, she also inspires one working-class friend to become more assertive, demonstrates her compassionate nature by accepting a former rival as a sister in spirit, and exposes a male professor as a pathetic letch.

And while the circumstances that Ms. Woods finds herself are a bit of a stretch, the enthusiasm and energy flow effortlessly towards a happy ending (with Luke Wilson) and its predictable sequel (Red, White, and Blonde).

Monster's Ball (2001)

An Monstrous Melodrama

[6/10 · 2 February 2010]

Attraction, usually called "chemistry", is what makes a relationship snap, crackle, and pop. In Monster's Ball, this chemistry seems hopelessly out of proportion---Halle Berry plays Leticia Muskgrove, a woman who is scalded by life's torments. After her son is killed and her husband is executed, she simply pulls all the stops out of the meaning of Drama Queen. Playing her opposite in this odd duet is Billy Bob Thorton, as Hank Grotowski, who's beginning to make a habit (typecasting, anyone?) of choosing roles that require minimal effort - er, sorry---"subtle" tones.

Billy Bob plays a sorry sort of mope, who's emotional range is stuck somewhere between less and non-existent. This man's response to his son's self-inflicted demise becomes stuffed into a saran-wrapped vacuum of denial and weary acceptance.

The fulcrum (emphasis on "crum!) is Billy Bob's father---Peter Boyle gives a sneering portrayal of a man who's emotional range teeters between his matter-of-fact contempt for African-Americans and his contempt for his son, because he chooses to live life in a comfort zone of numbing boredom.

By the time these two polar opposites trade sweat I was more interested in Halles' butt tattoo than this story of two tired people unable to care and unwilling to emotionally commit.

But the end of this frustrating flick is the emotional payoff for the viewer; and I'm glad I endured the hour + to finally "get the point". We're left with a scene that speaks volumes about what lies ahead for these two emotionally caged sweethearts.

Sitting on the steps, enjoying the nighttime symphony of stars, and sharing ice cream (I know, could the writer have been a little more, uh—subtle?) it's clear that Halle and Billy have been playing stereotypes---the angry black woman with an attitude and the constipated white man with a polite grimace.

And their self-contained happy ending is really a challenge for us, because the starry sky holds a universe of choices—and it's up to us how we want to go through life

Orlando (1992)

How Can 400 Years Be So Boring?

[4/10 · 2 February 2010]

What would happen if we could live a series of past lives, strung together like pearls, with full cognition of them all? Orlando, written and directed by Sally Potter, explores this theme, but then also weaves another few strands along the way. The title character, played by Tilda Swinton, plays Orlando like a skittish school girl, who remains confused and emotionally isolated from herself, those dearest to her, and the world at large.

While visually fascinating, Orlando bounds helter-skelter through 400 years of history and politics to make some fuzzy social commentary on gender, sexism, and love. The score is perhaps the most interesting element in a film that fails to connect with this viewer. It travels well through Orlando's four centuries, complimenting Swinton's movements with vibrations that haunt our senses. Like most art house period pieces, the sets are sumptuous creations, if a bit overblown with fabric and muted color.

I kept asking myself was Swinton's restrained performance purposely done---or just purposeless? Well, with art house cinema, we'll be debating that for many centuries ourselves!

Sid and Nancy (1986)

An Indie Surprise

[8/10 · 2 February 2010]

Sid and Nancy is a movie about the tortured relationship between Sid Vicious and his whiny girlfriend, Nancy. Please, somebody turn down the volume on this one, simply because her voice is just too irritating on this critic's last nerve! (Did she really talk like that, or was Ms. Webb in serious need of a voice coach? We may never know.) Most of Sid and Nancy revolves around the two titled post-teen's attempt to maintain some semblance of a real relationship in the midst of a lot of drugs and self-induced violence. What stopped me from turning off this sad statement of a generation was the performance of Gary Oldman. His sneering imitation of Sid's contempt for almost everyone around him masked a touching vulnerability when it came to Nancy and – yep, even their pet kitty.

And I've got to give the truly unforgettable award to Sid and Nancy, based on one single cinematic moment in the film--- you know what that moment is, don't you? Yeppers - Sid belting out a searing rendition of Old Blue Eye's favorite, "My Way". Set against a backdrop of stairs (that call to mind every high school assembly), Oldman scratches and claws at this song with such a ferocious intensity I'd give him the gold statue right now.

Because that's what a cinematic moment really is, the sum total of the character, presented to the audience in a kernel of truth. Gary Oldman – an actor whose gold statuette is long overdue — captures the twin torments of a twisted teen that really just wants to be loved and doesn't know how to get past his own angry angst.