Change Your Image
MrMuggz
Ratings
Most Recently Rated
Lists
An error has ocurred. Please try againReviews
Bullet Train (2022)
Tries way too hard. Terrible & all over the place.
The dialog was horribly written. It seemed to try to emulate a Tarantino or Guy Ritchie film - sharp witty banter and 5 different but all converging stories going on at the same time and eventually all wrapped up perfectly. Unfortunately, it failed miserably. Instead it was all over the place. Sometimes with films you have to take a "leap of faith" and suspend disbelief. You have to accept that the least likely possibilities keep happening, not just once, but over and over and over again. At that point, it becomes more of a fantasy than anything based in reality. Little things like, for the entire film people are murdered and lying dead all over the train. Doors are blown off the train. Firearms are fired repeatedly. Bystanders are murdered. Not once does a train employee appear except for a ticket taker and a food cart woman. Not at any time does another passenger on the train notice or report any of these things. The train keeps going. It never stops. It's like an autonomous entity speeding from station to station.
Speaking of trains, one of the film's main characters has a fascination with Thomas the Train. The first time it was explained I thought it was mildly amusing as best. The movie was long, drawn out, and boring, otherwise I would go back and count how many times Thomas the Train was mentioned...and then explained. I got it the first time and it wasn't funny then...let alone at least 8 other times in the film. She's a Diesel. You're a Thomas. I get it. DUMB!
Side note, I've never seen so many flashbacks in a single film explaining almost every reference. I kid you not. It got to a point at the end of the film where THE WATER BOTTLE had a flashback scene explaining it's backstory - bought from a vending machine, it didn't fall out of the row when the button was pressed, picked up by accident when purchasing a soda. It was tedious.
The film turns into an action comedy and farce. As the film begins to conclude all of the threads come back together in nonsensical ways leading to a final ending that was unsatisfying to say the least. The worst part is that this total waste 2 hours and 7 minutes long. 1 hour and 50 minutes still would've been more time than this garbage film deserved but I could've got 17 minutes of my life back.