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NeilCardiff
Reviews
Transporter 2 (2005)
the most ridiculous unbelievable nonsense I've ever seen
this film is tripe, the plot is contrives the action is just idiotic.
I loved the first movie. But this is crackers. I cant say i've ever seen an action movie that ever expected you to be a moron. Until now. you have to be a total idiot to take anything seriously. without spoilers. this film just sucks' there's about 300 completely impossible things in this movie. i mean stupidly impossible not just effects.
all i can do to get to 10 lines is say.
this movie is real crap, i mean cruddy , useless , daft, pointless, silly, dopey,
more lines needed, this film sucks ass its bad real bad
if yr on drugs. it might be a watch. if your at all normal.
is that 10 lines yet
don't bother.
1 out of 10
Dexter: Dexter (2006)
If you want to hear the lead character drone on from one cliché to the next, watch this.
Spoilers.
How can a show that is so desperately trying to be different be so full of cliché and formula? The lead character is supposed to be charming, but he just spouts so much drivel that you get really bored very quickly.
I agree with others. It comes across like the desperate attempts of an unintelligent adolescent to be deep and meaningful.
That brings me to the flashbacks, straight out of Serial Killers for Dummies. and the conversations about killing animals and wanting to kill people Dexter the kid has with his father, HOW RIDICULOUS
It's not just the Monologue that is contrived, so are the sets. In ep1, check out the completely white room with all the blood splatters and red ribbons. There for a visual effect, nothing more. Anyway it failed, it just looks tacky.
All in all a quite amateur attempt to creep people out mixed with a very mediocre cop show.
Not a truly awful attempt but could have done better, Much better.
4/10 for effort.
Grindhouse (2007)
2 poor and boring 'B' movies for the price of one. What a waste of money.
There's a spoof trailer for a cheesy horror in the middle, It's called "Don't" If only they told me this before I bought my ticket.
The first movie is a totally by the numbers, cliché and frankly rather dull "Zombie" B movie. We've all seen better a dozen times. OK there was loads of gore, but "Braindead" was better and that was made be a beginner for next to nothing.
The second outing into crappy 'B' movie land is 75 minuted of talking followed by another total cliché of a car chase. To be honest, I couldn't tell you why anyone with any reputation to defend would go near this dull formula borefest.
Let alone admit to writing it.
Wait until it comes out on video or DVD. at least some format where you can fast forward. trust me at 3 hours, you'll wish the hell you could if you go to the cinema, Trust me the car chase isn't worth the wait.
Looking for Comedy in the Muslim World (2005)
Wouldn't make a 5 yr old laugh.
We'll I must admit, I'm quite confused. If this is an attempt to explore the Muslims sense of humour then I think maybe it would have been a good idea to actually have some FUNNY content, especially in the stand up routines. On the other hand if this is a parody on the differences in humour then it failed completely because all I saw was someone who totally failed to understand his subject and was quite offencive at times.
Well. I'll put it like this, For a comedy, it wasn't funny. For an exploration of Muslim humour, it wasn't even a tiny bit insightful. For a bridge building exercise, it was embracing. And for a movie, it was a complete waste of my time.
Munich (2005)
State funded International terrorism. The Movie
What a great study of life in an international terrorist cell. Especially when you have all the funds that your government can throw at you.
Israel is worse than other states that actively encourages and sponsors Terrorism, they actually ordered the creation of the terrorist cell and their Prime Minister, Golda Meir, interviewed the terrorists personally.
No mention of the innocent Danish waiter that was murdered. Resulting in half the terrorists being arrested. Spielberg the hypocrite
This film says it all, if you want to find out about the people we should be scared of then watch.
I cannot fault the casting, actors or script. I just hope that the world looks at Israel and places them along side the other terrorist States we are all supposed to be watching so closely.
Alien (1979)
A simple triangle of brilliance, Quite simply perfect
Dan O'Bannon and Ronald Shusett's script is an irresistible Sci-fi epic that trounces any suspense film before and since. Their use of classic themes and new twists is truly inspiring.
Ridley Scott's impeccable casting and directing has to be seen to be believed. The timing and the startling horror are crafted into a masterpiece that will have you on the edge of your seat for every single minute.
H.R. Giger is simply the most original and startling artist that ever put paint to canvas, and the inspiration that springs from his work, just had too be used in a science fiction movie. Look him up on the net and you won't believe what you see.
True inspiration comes from the fact that the team who designed the ship were never allowed to come into contact with the Alien design team and this counterpoint makes the combination truly brilliant. add to that effects that stand the test of time and a treat for the eyes and pulse rate unfold right there on the screen.
I doubt whether there will ever be a sci-fi movie to beat this. I have seen over a hundred in the genre, none come close, It is quite simply UNIQUE.
I have seen movies in other styles that are as good as this, but none to beat it.
10 out of 10 out of 10.
Silkwood (1983)
America once again poisons its poor.
Shades of the Erin Brockovich case,
Once again we are told a story of how the legislature in America allows a company to "enslave" through ignorance and desperation a poor community into working under conditions that seriously damage their health.
This is by no means the afore mentioned classic, but it does show how the greedy will do anything to make money off the lives of the poor.
The cast is quite simply faultless and the story a simple tale of the futility of standing up to a corporate body. Especially when your life means nothing. I cannot say this film is in anyway great, but it is a story that has to be told. The acting is a testament to the simply lives these people lead the script is only lacking (I assume) due to forthcoming litigation.
Please watch this and don't let them do it to you.
An internet search for "Karen Silkwood bio" will tell you everything you need to know.
The Statement (2003)
I have to rebut the statements by dallanor-1
I am appalled that this man "dallanor-1" can say the Catholics are right in supporting this man as his acts were not "crimes". How many lawyers do the "Church" need to tell it that war crimes are wrong? This is the same mentality that allows Catholics to protect kiddie fiddlers. Two paedo's absolving each other is sick and anyone who stands back and lets these things happen is no better than the war criminals and paedo's the protect. Any member of an organisation that protects these people is tantamount to complicity in these crimes committed under their protection.
Also how dare you compare me with Brossard he is an animal, and any decent person is nothing like this "man".
As for the film, it isn't bad. Caine is quite good, if a little wooden. But I don't think I will want to watch it again.
Doctor Who (2005)
The Doctor is back, so are my childhood memories
As a child I used to love the Dr Who series and apparently I used to hide behind the sofa whenever the Daleks appeared. I think it must have been the voice. But over time the whole idea lost so much of its charm that it became a real pain to watch.
Well all that has changed, Every nostalgic moment I ever had about the doctor has come flooding back with this highly enjoyable reanimation of a childhood favourite, even though I am now well into my thirties.
Christopher Eccleston is great in the lead and Billy Piper makes the archetypal sidekick. This new incarnation is full of the humour and tongue in cheek appeal that I hoped it would be. I just hope it keeps going as it started.
I have to give this a ten even if it's just because it's filmed in my home town of Cardiff, If not for the fact that is gives me a glimmer of what I liked in this series from when I was a very small child.
Thanks to everyone involved and keep it coming.