puhzam Reviews

Are We There Yet? (2005)

This guy used to be in NWA

[1/10 · 12 October 2006]

Look what happened to him. Man, this guy wrote F--- that Police and Straight Outta Compton. I stopped the movie at the train station when the kids get off the train.

But let me tell you how it will end anyway. He'll go through a life changing experience with the kids and they'll learn to love each other. The kids will realize he's a good guy after all. He'll get together with the mom, probably after punching out the dead-beat dad and they'll get married. But first he's gotta give her the "I'm not your friend2 speech. Should have left this tripe to Sandler. Am I right? Yeah, I thought so...

Alien vs. Predator (2004)

The Very Last Scene (SPOILER obviously)

[22 January 2006]

When the alien bursts out of the dead Predator's chest right at the end of the movie, we can see it has the same cheek features of a Predator. Its cheeks open up just like the Predator. Wonder what that was all about.

In the original "Alien" they theorize that the Aliens adapt to the host's living conditions. By being cocooned in the Predator, the Alien might have picked up his facial features. That is the only plausible reason I can think of. Besides the "genetically mutated alien" conspiracy theory, why does the Alien look like a Predator? Does anyone have the facts on this??

Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith (2005)

Here's a shocker: It sucked

[5/10 · 22 May 2005]

*Probably some spoilers* I just came back from the theater after hearing many positive reviews and frankly I found it to be the same as the other two. Clone Wars is better than this one. The only nice thing I can say about the last SW is that we find out how Anakin becomes Darth Vader and what happens to the twins. Grievous was also pretty original.

And what's up with Padme? Is it me or did she turn from Queen into some bare-foot in the kitchen and pregnant crying trailer trash bitch? Wasn't she supposed to have a strong personality? why didn't she get involved with the story? Worst of all, she dies of disappointment, what's up with that?!

RoTS kept the same pace of the other two and didn't do anything to be better. I thought it would be the one I would would buy on DVD but I'll skip it too. And I am amazed to hear that some said it was as good as the original trilogy. Blasphemy!

Alien (1979)

When you`re in the mood for paranoia

[10/10 · 23 September 2003]

This movie has everything I want: 2 hours of stifling paranoia. Turn all the lights off, spark one and freak out. Maybe The Thing (the original one) comes close. The intensity grows and grows and when the killing starts, you feel as if you`re part of the crew. Alien is truly original.

The Meaning of Life (1983)

The Best or Worst Python Film

[4 September 2003]

You will either think its the best work they`ve ever done, or the worst. There is no in between. I find it to be the best purely on the edginess of the material. Almost every sketch has the potential to offend and shock. It can be extremely depressing too, but you`re laughing anyway. I truly believe that the Pythons have lost their minds here. They look crazy (watch Cleese`s eyes as the doctor and in the organ donor sketch). It`s not lighthearted fun, its quite serious humor and that is perhaps why most people dont like it or dont get it. If thats how you like your comedy, this movie is for you.

A Note on the DVD: I dont think the transfer from video to DVD worked too well. Anything that moves on the screen is pixilated (I dont know what the exact term for it is). There are weird lines that show up on anything that moves.

Denis Leary: Lock 'N Load (1997 TV Special)

What Happened?

[1/10 · 10 August 2003]

Truly awful. This is a far departure from "No Cure For Cancer". The number one rule for comedians should be: NEVER talk about your kids or pets. Its just not funny. I could care less about how cute his kids are. I want serious comedy. Where's the edge? Where's the drugs, sex and rock n' roll?

Let me put it this way, he used to bitch about cigarettes, now he complains about coffee.

The Song Remains the Same (1976)

The Good, the Bad and the Ugly

[8/10 · 27 July 2003]

It must be mentioned, for the people who are about to see this movie for the first time, that this concert was filmed at the end of Led Zeppelin's "Houses of the Holy" tour. The band was tired, sloppy and wanted to go home... and it shows. This might not be right for someone looking for a polished concert movie like, say, U2's "Rattle & Hum" or Pink Floyd's "Delicate Sound of Thunder".

If you are curious as to what a band looks/sounds like after its been touring and partying for ages, this is it. Jimmy page is sloppy, makes mistakes and goes off key once or twice. The same goes for the rest of the band, except for John Paul Jones who's ever the professional musician. This tired intensity that Zep gives off is unparalleled. They are ugly in the best sense.

Too bad for the 'fantasy' interludes that pepper the movie. Although many disagree, I cringe when I see them (Plant dropping to his knees and plunging his sword in the sand, Jones riding his horse back home). During "No Quarter" for example, I suggest you close your eyes and listen to the music. Don't let the visuals ruin the tunes.

The band wanted to film another concert for this film (after they'd rested a bit) but when it was canceled, they 'settled' for this one. Bless them for allowing a concert with so many mistakes to go out. It is truly interesting to see a great band go on autopilot and still rock. That is the true essence of Led Zeppelin: Unpolished and raw, just like their albums. This concert flaunts it.

Phone Booth (2002)

What's going to happen next?

[13 July 2003]

I'm not sure what the movie students will say to this: I liked the movie because it kept me guessing as to what would happen next, BUT, never for a second was I scared for any of the characters. I never feared that the sniper would actually shoot anyone. All I cared about was: What's going to happen next? For that reason alone I liked the movie.

Not a bad movie from a director who symbolizes all that is wrong with Hollywood.

The Last Starfighter (1984)

What a great little movie

[8 July 2003]

I just finished watching this movie on the television. Every time that flick comes on, I feel the need to drop everything and watch it. I know that there's loads wrong with it, but for some reason, I really enjoy it. Even as a 10 year old I was aware of the cheesy 'believe in yourself' message, the overly stupid trailer people and the tacky bad guy but I put it all aside thanks to the movie moving so quickly and the great space battles. Sure, it's all simple and everything gets resolved quite easily, but nevertheless, it's great fun to watch.

Some say the CG is outdated, but what exactly? The only things that look outdated are the rocks inside and outside the asteroids. The starfighter itself still looks great. And the bad guys in the orange suits are amazing. I still love that line: "What do we do now?"...." We die". Great stuff.

Let me put it this way, I wouldn't buy it on DVD, but if it's on TV, commercial free, I'll definitely watch it.