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stratovarius_1996
Reviews
Hustlers (2019)
Boring pointless Boring
Its a boring and pointless movie even for hardcore JLo fans. "Showgirls" is a masterpiece compared to this pile of crap. Dont waste your time (i warned u)
Hyenas (2011)
Hyen-ass
I saw this movie tonight. I was expecting it to be a bad but NOT this bad film! The CGI effects are awful, the acting was even worse. The lines are bad. Guess the director wanted to "change" a bit the all werewolf scenarios and instead.. he replaced them with "hyenas", humans who transform in to these animals at night and hunt for some human meat. The story cant get serious since the acting is super bad. It has some good points like the woods in the dark are well directed but thats it. If u want to have a good laugh with your mates then this is the movie to see. I gave this film a 3/10 because of the laughs I had and also for Christa Campbell who is gorgeous.. although without nipples (!) Pass this crappy film and if you don't have anything better to do then go to bed.
2012 (2009)
Same old Emmerich!
For those who know who this German director is, I wont have to say much. Those who don't, I ll have to add that he is the "master of disaster" movie maker. For those who liked the Day After Tomorrow, will enjoy this one. Even more. Better visual effects, more interesting story, but.... one of the same. I believe that if u have seen ONE Emerich movie, then u have seen them all... except from Godzilla which I personally didn't like that much. Films such as LOTR or this one here are MADE for movie theaters.. so don't hesitate and enjoy the film. Its worth the money. You will see what u have seen on the trailers.. and maybe a little more.
Hostel: Part II (2007)
Very funny! One of the same though
Its the same as the first one. What comes though in the last 22 minutes is extraordinary! You ll see things that you ve never seen again on the screen. I hope that nothing will be 'cut' and the full version will play in theaters. If you believe SAW 3 is the freakiest horror movie ever to date.. you are wrong! Slovakia is once again the place in Hostel 2. Like the first film, it takes over 1 hour to see splatter scenes which is very disappointing. The grande finale though makes all splatter fans very very happy. he-he. One more thing I must say.. movies such as HOSTEL are made for gore-fans and not for aunt Lindy! So please If you don't like certain movies just go and watch The princess Diaries ore something. Don't judge horror genres if you have no clue about horror films. Overall Hostel 2 is a bit boring but has some very good moments in the middle and a kick-ass last 20 minutes. Scenes never again seen in the movies. Very funny also. 7/10... Gore fans get ready... and enjoy!!!
Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Kazakhstan (2006)
Borat For U.S President!
I see that a lot of people have written many good things about this film so I cant say more... All I want to say is GO and watch it and after years to come you ll tell your children or grandchildren ... "Yes grandson... I saw the best comedy of all time at the movies in 2006.. long time ago.". I want to say though a few things for those who have put a "1" telling how awful the film is... I believe you guys don't have a sense of humour u must be nerds or something.. Cant explain it. Borat makes fun and gives a message to the American culture and people who think that he is making fun of the Jews.... u are all wrong! It is the opposite, and I m no Jews, instead I dislike Jews people. A must see film probably the best comedy of all time with several todays life messages. 10/10 definitely
Frankenfish (2004)
ohhhhhhhhhhh....auuuuuuubert ;)
I would vote for 1 but after seen ms Aubert I thought again... ;) A worst version from Anacondas and a better one than Boa vs Python this film is a good laugh BEST seeing with your mates! When I first saw the title 'Frankenfish' I couldn't stop laughing. I knew exactly what to expect and the outcome was a great laugh. The visual effects are poor but according to what we ve seen from video-films they get a 7 out of 10. The actors just don't know how to act. K D Aubert is the only one a guy will remember from the film.. u ll find out why ;) If u are mature enough don't rent the DVD.. If u want to have a good time with your friends go and get it now. Overall the film is crap.. 2/10.. only because of K D ;)
Running Scared (2006)
Better than the Trailer ;)
When I saw the trailer of running scared I thought that it would be just another boring action film thats why I didn't see it at the movies. I rented the DVD and said WOW!!! The truth is that the trailer isn't exactly what the film shows you and thats why many people disliked the movie! It has some Tarantino-alike- scenes that will blow u away! I am a huge Mr Q fan and thank God I saw a really good adventure after a long long time! Paul Walker (for the first time ever) was great but what got my attention was the acting of little Cameron Bright. You gotta watch this kid! I believe he is up for great things in the future! The movie is a must-bye DVD that all true action adventure fans should.. or MUST own. 10 out of 10 definitely!!!
Amores perros (2000)
The Mexican Pulp Fiction
An amazing movie from the streets of Mexico. It combines three different stories which connectin a way. This is a film not for dog lovers, but for Tarantino fans. It has pure violence and gore, but unfortunately the dog fights don't show "much" and what I mean by that is that every time 2 dogs fight we only see the moment they attack each other, which lasts around 5 secs. The three stories are very well written, with strong language and a lot of blood. I put amores perros an 8/10 because of the unfinished dog fight scenes and also because a rottweiler.... even if its very well trained.. cannot beat and kill a dog fighting champion pitbull! Not a chance guys. ha-ha. Overall it is a great film to watch and own.
Epistrofi ton katharmaton (2003)
when streetfighter sound effects meet souglakos belly
An ultimate cult Greek movie masterpiece that can even be compared to the Godfather and Schindler's List. Apostolos Souglakos gives a performance to remember that only actors such as Al Pacino and Robert De Niro have the ability to perform the role. Explicit gore and raw violence mixed together are the outcome of this legendary marvellous action dramatic erotic gory film. Fokionas (the film director) is a mix of James Cameron and Steven Spielberg put in one, he knows how to place the camera with special movie skills and how to shock the audience with extreme outfit costums (ex. the journalist on the very first scene). You must buy the ULTIMATE anniversary special edition of the film as soon as possible, the one with the 6.1 DTS THX UMD edition. 10 out of 10 definitely
The Crow (1994)
It cant rain all the time
I saw the crow when I was nearly 14 years old at the movies and when I learned that Brandon Lee got killed in the middle (ending) of the film I was so shocked that I almost cried. Lee gives an excellent performance filled up with emotion, sarcasm, energy which makes all viewers starting believing in angels. It is probably the darkest Gothic film of all time at its best and we don't know how far would Brandon Lee go if he was still alive today. Life has been so unfair for the Lee family, people say that they are cursed. I wonder when will the crow be released in a special edition DVD set. It deserves it. Brandon deserves it. All Gothic and not only fans deserve it. Thank you Brandon and thank you Alex Proyas for this great film. 10 of course. Rest in peace Brandon. Thanx again
Cursed (2005)
the funniest movie of the season
After having directed a masterpiece such as Nightmare on Elm Street and Scream.. then you expect from a man like Craven something bigger than the preview works that he has created. When I went to see Cursed I knew from the very beginning what I was going to see. The film is excellent to see with your mates of girlfriend.. but don't make the fatal mistake to see it alone by yourself because you might get bored. The visual effects are terrible, even "An American werewolf in London" has better visual effects than this. I remember the scene where the werewolf was chasing some guy and he looked like an un-combed poodle. ha-ha. I give cursed a 8/10 for a good evening time with my mates.. and a 1/10 for the film itself.. the final 3/10 is what this movie deserves. Go and see SAW or SAW 2 instead.. they are two great horror masterpieces.
The Alan Shearer Story (2005)
The greatest striker of all time
This is dedicated to the no1 "killer" of our times. Mr Alan Shearer is a total goal machine he plays for Newcastle United and is the no1 goal scorer in the history of Premier League. 5 goals in one game 30 goals in 60 international games more than 300 goals in premier league this is alan shearer or alien alan thx shearer u r the man. Althiugh we don't see much of the goal scorer but the man as a citizen this is actually a great DVD. Shearer is a role model for youngsters and a living legend for football history. Enjoy alien alan and i promise u u will not regret this he is the man for the job. Alan u are the one and only u are the God u are The Best
Saw (2004)
The best horror film of the 00''s
If you liked Se7ven then u will adore SAW. I don't want to say much about the film because when I first saw it I didn't know what to expect.. It is probably the best film of the new decade according to the genre and one of the best definitely of the last 20 years. You already know the plot but you will not predict the ending. In a few words BUY the DVD and place it in a safe 'holy' place next to your fave DVDs and watch it over again and again and again and again.... Thank u for SAW, I had one of the most glorious days in my life inside the cinema.. P.S: Those who say bad comments about SAW.. all u have to do is check on their favourite films that are put on their lists of comments and u ll find out why they disliked saw. ha-ha-ha
Saw II (2005)
WOW.. Probably the best horror sequel ever.
I loved SAW 1 and when I read the papers that a sequel will take place this year I wasn't very excited because I really believed that it would ruin the first excellent amazing film. After seen the movie, all I have to say is that I am really thrilled by this sequel.. Its definitely not as good as the first one, because u didn't expect that the film would have a turn around, although in SAW 2 u expect a shocking ending. It has more turn arounds than the first but its not as good though. The tag line says it all.. there will be blood.. ooh yes.. u will see a lot of blood in this one. I put a 9/10 to SAW2 because simply, its not better than the first one :p
Cry Wolf (2005)
One of the same...
When I went to the theater to see Cry_Wolf I expected to see exactly what I saw.. According to the plot it is very interesting and prototype in a way, taken from a Greek myth by Esopos. Anyway.. all actors who star in this horror film especially the main characters, the guy(gay), are horrible. They don't convince anybody. The acting is very poor and there is no gore or blood or any scene with blood after a murder is done.. The ending is not shocking at all.. if u are a horror freak then u can find out what its gonna happen ?(very easily). Go and see SAW II instead than waste your money. The best thing is to wait for the DVD or see it at the movies with lots of friends and have a good laugh. P.S besides Jov Bon The Frog Jovi stars in it too. :p
Alexander (2004)
Probably the worst film ever made
What can I say about this movie? It is the worst film ever made.. It should be named Alexander The Gay and not the Great. Oliver Stone doesn't present us the Greatest leader of all history at all as a leader or a conquerer. He just shows us Alexander as a gay character, the film had only one battle.. I wonder where did the 120 million dollars went? Alexander was a philosopher, a commander, a killer, he had thirst for battle he was beloved as a God and still is until today by many nations. I am a proud Greek because my country except from the lights of civilization, gave birth to the greatest leader of all time... shame on u Mr Stone. I have nothing against gay people. Besides the poster of the movie should be posted outside every gay man's door to admire the one and only Alexander the Gay Thank you
Freddy Got Fingered (2001)
the best movie ever made
I don't wanna say much about this film.. as a film critic myself all I have to say is that I wish all those saying that this film is crap etc etc go to a movie theater and see this film for the first time. I m gonna laugh watching them running out of the cinema. Tom Green is genius, in my language he is 'kafros'. Yes, its a Greek word! It is a film that u will remember either u like it or not. Tom Green is the best comedian of our time. Why do u Americans hate tom green so much? You have the worst and the greatest ass... president of all time and u blame tom green? ha-ha c ya :) oh and also i believe that u all need mental help.