wahoo8888 Reviews

The Stanford Prison Experiment (2015)

Bunch of Test Tube Babies

[3/10 · 29 January 2016]

This was not a very compelling movie. Completely devoid of drama or intrigue. Plagued with horrible writing and sub-par acting. The premise made little sense as did the characters portraying the guard and prisoner roles. It appears that the students selected as prisoners would later become jurors in the Casey Anthony trial; so lacking common sense and seemingly any grip on reality. It took all of two days for everyone to completely loose it. I thought Stanford had high admittance requirements? Anyway, production values were low and editing was poor. In addition, I don't believe you can decriminalize kidnapping via contract. And I just wonder why the academics couldn't just use actual data from the many. many existing prisons in the country instead of setting up what seemed like a very unorganized, confusing, and last minute experiment. What was most compelling was that anyone involved in this stupidity could possibly take it seriously.

The Last Ship (2014–2018)

Not Really

[2/10 · 22 June 2015]

We are going to save the world's population from a deadly virus even if we have to kill everyone to do it. This unfortunately seems to be the premise of this show. For a show purportedly about a group of soldiers and civilians trying to preserve the human race, there sure is a lot of killing. The characters in this show (across the board) shoot and kill other people so indiscriminately and with no remorse or empathy at all, it's no wonder our younger generation is desensitized to it. I guess, when the chips are down, you can always expect the worst from human beings, at least according to the writers of The Last Ship. I wonder why they care so much about saving the human race when they seemingly have no respect for human life. I'm not entirely sure what the title refers to because their destroyer is most certainly not the last ship, but then again, the writers have not even attempted to explain any of the events that are happening in this show. Considering the characters in this show, is there really anything left worth saving?

Dark Matter (2015–2017)

A Winner!!

[2/10 · 20 June 2015]

I'm guessing that the concept and script for this show was the winner of a national contest of second graders to develop the next Canadian Sci-Fi show for American audiences. While aiming for the second grade may be a profitable business and capture the attention of a large, undiscriminating, and wholly ignorant American fan base, this show simply and unduly adds to the already overflowing landfill of garbage shows churned out by low-budget, no-name Canadian production companies for American exploitation. The dialog is laughable (how do the actors keep a straight face?). The storyline is not only simplistic but exceedingly predicable and ineffective. Production values? We've seen all this before (it looks like they put the entire set together from items retrieved from a recycle bin.) I would rather see one great show, than 50 of these rushed, shabby, low-quality, nonsensical embarrassments that are used as Syfy Chanel filler. I guess this is the result of too many channels with too much air time to fill. The trailer for this show was far more entertaining than the actual show (which seems to be the trend for these summer burn offs).

Fifty Shades of Grey (2015)

Sure to Sweep Come Awards Season

[1/10 · 19 June 2015]

There isn't a Razzie Award that this movie hasn't locked up. To say that the acting rivals that of those churned out by the porn industry is an insult to porn actors. Also, the extent of passion, emotion, and sensuality also pales compared to most porn movies. This is a big budget movie created for the same people willing to lower themselves into the sewers of literature and read the book, i.e., immature, unsophisticated morons who probably giggle at the inept attempt at eroticism here. I was completely surprised at how average looking the leads were. And aside from absolutely no chemistry between them, how horrible their acting (and everyone else in the movie) was. This isn't by any means a love story. This is a story about how Hollywood is willing to make this kind of crap to take money away from emotionally stunted, lonely, sexually repressed individuals who still think this joke of a story can happen to them. Thank god I got the DVD from the library and didn't waste any money on this trash.

Working the Engels (2014)

????????

[1/10 · 25 July 2014]

What an embarrassment. For the writers, actors, producers and especially those of us in the audience who were expecting an adult show. I see the typical production staff reviews are here (who in their right mind would think this is a quality show). This is childish, immature drivel that should never have made it to network TV. NBC has sunk to a new low and that was a challenge given how low they have previously set the bar. I liken the quality to that of a cheap cable Saturday morning children's show. This truly would have been better if they had used puppets instead of live actors. On the plus side, it is the perfect companion to Welcome to Sweden.

The Fosters (2013–2018)

Mediocre Family Drama

[6/10 · 7 July 2014]

This show definitely has possibilities. The key word is drama and the set up for this show should allow for many seasons worth. The biggest problem for me so far is the acting. While some members of the ensemble are great, several of the younger actors are so bad it is distracting. While this may be acceptable for a comedy, where overacting is often part of the charm, here it detracts from the drama. It deadens some moments that were meant to be (and should have been) serious. And though I haven't watched the show from the beginning, I wonder how a teacher and police officer can afford the extremely large and appointed home they reside in, especially on the west coast.

That Awkward Moment (2014)

A Masterpiece!

[18 May 2014]

Actually, it's a master piece of sh#t. I haven't seen a movie where the acting was this bad through and through in a long time. I guess the really awkward thing about this movie is the script. And, none of the actors were that particularly good looking. Even Zac E. looked bloated and at times about 3 feet tall (everyone in the movie was taller than he was). And what was the point of this movie? Guys create a roster of women for sex, so they don't have to get serious with anyone. The characters were so unappealing, I really didn't care what they were up to, and was kinda hoping most of them would get arrested for extreme stupidity and hauled off the set so we could give others a try. This movie is sure to clean up at the Razzies this year.

The Wolf of Wall Street (2013)

Excessive Excess and Excessively Long

[30 March 2014]

Since when does stringing scene after scene of debauchery, drug-abuse, and wanton sex make for good drama, or for that matter, advance an interesting story. After two hours of this I just wanted to scream "I get it, this guy had no moral compass, now can we get on with the story." But apparently, there is no story other than that. The theme here is excess, but not just in the story, in the movie making. Did Jordan achieve because of his excess, or did he fail because of his excess, or was it both? Hard to tell when everything was presented in such an extreme way. Hardly a great acting performance from any of the cast since they all seemed to have lived at least part of their lives in this manner. If the excess movie-making technique was used to further illustrate the main characters flaws, it was used too excessively. I left the movie 1.5 hours in and I missed nothing.

Rake (2014)

Why Rake?

[3/10 · 22 March 2014]

First off, why is this show called Rake? It should be called Idiot since the main character is just that. There have been many endearing shows where the main character exhibits eccentricities, but this show takes it too far.

Secondly, the cases presented thus far have all been recycled from other, better, legal dramas. Programs that at least take legality into consideration when writing their scripts.

Thirdly, the humor (or better, attempted humor) in this program is more mean-spirited than funny, but only when it is not completely without taste.

Fourthly, the supporting characters, such as the mayor, are just as corrupt and nonredeemable as the main character, as are their subordinates and associates.

Fifthly, the main character seems fine with his teenage son having an affair with his high school teacher, although that really says more about the pathetic writing staff then the storyline itself.

And lastly, when the characters on a scripted show behave worse than those in the current batch of reality show crap, then it's time to Rake that show under the carpet and pretend it was never there.

Lovelace (2013)

Hard to Swallow

[2/10 · 22 March 2014]

The twist in this movie is when Linda Lovelace is suddenly portrayed as a victim rather than a willing participant in the porn industry. I didn't buy it. Even after many many attempts to show her as the victim, it seemed she always had numerous ways out. And she was never a woman without means to get away (surrounded by lots of coworkers and friends, many of whom implored her to fess up, and were rich and loved her or saw her as an extremely lucrative meal ticket). Over and over this movie tried to portray her as naive and innocent, i.e., she didn't realize she was auditioning for a porn film. I wonder what she thought was on the film her husband brought into the audition (spoiler alert, it was her doing what she became famous for)? It doesn't really matter how good the actors were, the script was childish and insulting to anyone with a second grade education. I can't imagine why so many well known celebrities chose to participate (maybe they didn't realize they were auditioning for a movie about a porn star). Since both lead characters real-life counterparts have died, the filmmakers could take ridiculous liberties with the story. They were definitely given the shaft.

The 100 (2014–2020)

The 100 Reasons Not to Watch This Show

[1/10 · 21 March 2014]

Actually there are probably far more than 100 reasons and I'm not going to list them all here. I'm sure many more will follow in other reviews. But, just to get started, the setup for this show is so preposterous I don't know where to begin. The survivors of a future apocalypse escape an irradiated Earth and live in space stations, where the punishment for any crime "no matter how small" is death (apparently mostly Republicans survived the Apocalypse). Except if you are under 18, then you get to live in prison until you are 18, then reviewed, and then presumably, put to death. However, the compassionate adults of the future have decided to send 100 teenagers approaching 18 to the Earth as guinea pigs to monitor their survival. If they die, so what, they were going to be killed anyway. And, as we all know, teenagers would certainly represent the best option for the survival of humanity. So as not to disappoint, the teenagers are self-centered, arrogant, idiots who are completely unaware of what is going on; and completely incapable of any kindness or compassion (who knows, maybe this will change as time goes by, but, this group does not give me any hope for the future). Immediately the kids start to bicker and congregate into uncooperative groups (a sure sign of maturity). So far, the show seems to be about a typical trip to the mall. On the bright side, the adults in this show do not fare much better. Apparently there are no schools on that space station (and from the feel of it, maybe just mind-numbing reruns of reality shows as entertainment). Apparently, and according to all TV shows and movies, the future human race no longer evolves, but devolves into a species of ultra-violent racists, hellbent on annihilation. It does make sense though, that spending a couple years in prison as a teenager would prepare you for immediate expulsion to the surface of a planet that was recently decimated by nuclear war. Oh, and there must be great hair stylists in that prison because The 100 all look like they just stepped out of a salon.

Agents of S.H.I.E.L.D. (2013–2020)

Soft Humorous Intelligent Enjoyable Lacking Disappointing

[6/10 · 18 March 2014]

The setup is there: The agents investigating phenomena on Earth (INTELLIGENT). The execution is somewhat (DISAPPOINTING). Although, many episodes strike the perfect balance between the dramatic and (HUMOROUS), hardly any of the Team act like seasoned agents at this level (LACKING). Some come close. But the whole storyline with Skye and her forced insertion into assignments (why are they sending her into dangerous situations?) is the most disappointing of them all. She is without a doubt the weakest link and should not be part of an elite team. The later episodes where the rest of the Team develops such a sympathetic and emotional attitude towards her (SOFT), especially Coulson, is wretch-inducing and ruins the dynamic that should be present in a Team of this caliber (May and Ward come closest). She, in fact, is mostly the reason things do not go as planned. Get rid of her and the show can become a tighter, more futuristic adventure (ENJOYABLE). Keep her, and it will spiral into mediocrity (CANCELLATION).

Hollywood Game Night (2013–2020)

Hollywood Lame Night

[1/10 · 16 March 2014]

Finally, in addition to all the talk shows where celebrities gush over celebrities, comes Hollywood Game Night. Yet another opportunity to witness arrogant, self-centered, narcissistic celebutants overact to see who can get the most attention. As if we need another forum to demonstrate that it does not take intelligence to become famous. As a matter of fact, it seems that it only takes a great lack of self respect and a limited amount of self awareness. It also shows how unfunny these people are when their writers aren't there to prop them up. I think we should create another award show so we can even further celebrate those in the spotlight willing to sink to the lowest level for the sake of self-promotion. Watching the "celebrities" on this show reminds me of how adults might act to try to get a crying child to quiet down. I guess they think of the audience as a bunch of crying babies. After watching this show, I can't imagine they are far from reality.

Mixology (2013–2014)

Ugh!

[1/10 · 9 March 2014]

My mother taught me if I don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all. So, I'd like to take this opportunity to discuss possible reasons why the quality of network television programming has degraded so rapidly these past few years:

1) TV executives are just so stupid that they actually think these programs are good;

2) TV executives have such a low opinion of the American audience that they actually think we think these programs are good;

3) The American audience is actually so stupid that they actually think these programs are good;

4) Hollywood is guided by inexpensive focus groups located in trailer parks throughout the country; or

5) We all just have to accept the fact that TV programming will play to the lowest level of society because they will continue buy all the stupid stuff advertised on TV.

We all should be embarrassed by the quality of programs that are making it on air these days. If they truly are a reflection of society, then God help us all.

Ender's Game (2013)

Our Fate is in the Hands of a Fetus

[17 February 2014]

I didn't read the book. I am hoping it is better than the movie. I wonder how difficult is was for Harrison Ford to keep a straight face during his many ridiculous monologues.

So, in the future, our best bet to survive an attack against our alien enemy is in the form of a 50 pound, 12-year-old, with acne, and a still-changing voice. I guess their theory is anyone over 12 cannot handle the crushing amount of data that must be assimilated in a small amount of time to mount a successful counterattack. I guess computers have not advanced much. His crew (also a group of 12 years olds) is that way for the same reason. All the older (teenagers and up) humans who are now catastrophic has-beens are relegated to training, observing, criticizing, and just plain torturing the 12 year old hopefuls. What an amazing end to a storied career that must be.

The dialog is childish. Watching these children salute each other and act as soldiers is comical. The reason we are fighting them now is straight out of George W. Bush's play-book. And, the action sequences are lame at best. Ender is the name of the child commander and also what he just did to any hope for a movie franchise.

Intelligence (2014)

Insult to your Intelligence

[1/10 · 11 February 2014]

Does anyone in Hollywood have an original idea anymore? It seems like the writers simply tried to take the best concepts from other successful shows and jam them together. You'd think they would have learned from the hundreds of previously failed attempts to do this, but I guess not. There are far too many ludicrous and laughable points to this story to mention, but, to name a few from the first couple of episodes:

1. They implanted a chip in the brain of a ex-special ops soldier that gives him access to all information and he can use cloud data to somehow visualize crime scenes. This makes him irreplaceable as an intelligence asset, yet he is sent into dangerous situations constantly with only one other agent (also couldn't a computer do all this with that chip). In Captain Phillips, we sent 2 Navy Destroyers, an Aircraft Carrier, and Navy Seals to rescue one person from four poor, uneducated Somali pirates, surely we can find a couple more soldiers to accompany this expensive asset into battle.

2. Of course the agent assigned to protect him (an ex-special ops soldier) is a young, hot, female agent (and surprise, the sexual tension ensues).

3. The ridiculous sexual banter between these two during gun fights, bomb blasts, etc. is excruciating to watch.

4. There is more discourse between the different government agencies than between the good guys and the bad guys.

5. All the employees in these special government operations seem to lack the necessary intelligence to even remotely be believable, no one seems to ever follow orders, no one is ever punished for not following orders, and Marge Helgenberger is the tortured female head of a cyber crimes division that can never seem to get any respect from anyone else, all the while she plots to undermine her fellow superiors.

And on and on. This show would have been better as a children's cartoon. But, as with most American television shows nowadays, it starts with an interesting concept, then quickly spirals to the dumbed-down, unimaginative, crap that inhabits the other 500 or so channels available.

Last Vegas (2013)

These guys are funny, but...

[7/10 · 9 February 2014]

According to this movie, all young men are bumbling, drunken idiots, and all women are drugged-out, drunken, sex-starved lunatics who dress like prostitutes. That aside (and it is always disappointing that these type movies - mostly Adam Sandler-like productions, can only find their humor under these juvenile circumstances) the movie had some genuinely funny moments. These guys deserve a better script because their chemistry was apparent throughout and together they are surprisingly hilarious. Let's hope the success of this one will bring back these stars in a comedy more befitting their talent, and not an embarrassing Hangover-like sequel.

2 Broke Girls (2011–2017)

I Keep Waiting for it to Get Better

[2/10 · 30 October 2013]

After I first saw the ads for this show, I thought it would be funny. After I saw the first few episodes, I thought it would get better. After I watched the first season, I thought Season 2 would be an improvement. Zero stars for me. This show actually has gotten worse. The acting is so bad it is often excruciating. It seems that the 2 broke girls are just reading punch lines from a cue card. And apparently the writers believe that the more off-color the joke, the funnier. And would somebody please tell the actors that talking really loud does not make this miserably written show any funnier either. I guess the network agrees with me since the shows has been downgraded to the 8:30 time slot. Next stop...Saturday night.

The Golden Girls (1985–1992)

A Classic!

[10/10 · 30 October 2013]

There aren't many TV shows produced these days that will stand the test of time. This show has proved its meddle and then some. Every episode is a classic. The four stars etched in our brains as the golden girls we spent so many evenings with sharing cheesecake (and maybe an inappropriate story or two). All I can say is:

Thank you for being a friend. Travelled down the road and back again. Your heart is true, you're a pal and a confidant.

And if you threw a party, invited everyone you knew. You would see the biggest gift would be from me and the card attached would say, thank you for being a friend.

Once Upon a Time in Wonderland (2013–2014)

Did Anyone At The Network Watch This Before Airing?

[1/10 · 30 October 2013]

Calling this a train-wreck would be a disservice to all train-wrecks. I don't even know where to begin. Everything about this show is just wrong. The actors (does this take place in Britain?) are so wooden it at times appears to be stop-motion animation. The writing (is each script selected at random from a second grade class writing assignment?). The production (taken from the trash bin of the Wizard of Oz set?). The storyline makes no sense at all. The action sequences are so amateurish that I'm wondering if the viewer is meant to laugh. I actually felt sorry for the actors because this has to be a very public embarrassment for them. Their only saving grace will be that any discerning viewer will have tuned out long before the season fades into obscurity.