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jjchiappelli2
Reviews
Lost (2004)
The only network show I've actually enjoyed in many years
The greatest shock that "Lost" has given me is that it is an excellent show and it airs on ABC, of all places. I have been thoroughly unimpressed with network television for a very long time and to see something as fresh, witty, exciting, and well-written as "Lost" is probably the closest thing to a life-changing experience I could have while watching TV.
This show is incredible. There's no other way to describe it---every aspect, from the sets to the acting to the music to the plot, is brilliantly handled. This is not your average primetime drama. This isn't your average anything, for that matter. It's more like a serialized film than anything else. While other shows have had continuing story lines behind them, I've not seen any that have been done so well as "Lost." With this show, you feel like the creators mapped out every last detail before shooting the first script---it's not just episodic crap that re-hashes the same old tired plot-lines. It's all building up to something greater. Each episode builds on the suspense that came before it, which means that every time you think you've reached the peak---there's another step.
All of the characters are interesting and likable. Even Sawyer, the gruff, selfish guy that everybody on the island hates, is more likable and interesting than 90% of all the other characters you'll ever see on TV shows.
It's tough to even find a single complaint. But, there is one minor thing that bothers me: the flashback format of the show, while a wonderful device for developing characters' personalities and backstories, sometimes becomes more frustrating than enjoyable. You see, the standard format for the show is that it picks a central character. While multiple plot-lines are developed throughout the show, only the central character will have flashbacks, which are interspersed with the present action every 5 minutes or so. Usually this is okay, but once in awhile there's a snag; either the present action will be way, way more interesting than the flashbacks, or the "central character" is just not very interesting at the moment.
Jack, the doctor, has had at least four episodes to hog the spotlight. Possibly more---I've lost count. He's an interesting character, but during some episodes, it seems like the show would work far better if there was a different character having flashbacks. Specifically, in one episode where Character X dies. (Just in case you're one of the three people who doesn't already know who dies, I'll keep it a secret for this review.) Character X only had one episode of backstory---not even a full episode, as his backstory was shared with another character. So, you'd think that in the final episode that he's alive, we might get a chance to learn more about him. Nope. It's a Jack episode. And while Jack's great, and all, you get frustrated watching X die and wondering, "What was his life all about?" But like I said, it's a minor complaint. Even that episode was great and entertaining the whole way through.
I can only hope that the creators don't let this show run past its prime. It would be terrible for them to run out of steam and go into a 6th season by trying to come up with "new, exciting mysteries." For now, though, it's excellent---and we'll just leave it at that.
Windy City Heat (2003)
Terribly unfunny, unless you're a total ***hole
You know, I hate to have to reduce my criticism of a movie into the simple phrase, "It's mean." But "Windy City Heat" is so terrible that I really can't find a better way to describe it. It's mean, and it's a bad movie because it is mean.
As you probably know already, the plot revolves around Perry Caravello, a struggling actor (and an unlikeable personality) who desperately wants to be a celebrity. A couple of his "friends" devise a scheme to make him think he's part of a big-budget action movie and they film the results as Perry continues to swallow all the lies he's fed.
The movie is supposed to be funny because it's an impressive prank that's being pulled on an incredibly stupid, gullible, and unlikeable person.
Instead, it's incredibly unfunny and depressing because it's a malicious prank. "Windy City Heat" could only be less funny if the premise was that two guys kidnapped Perry's wife and made him think that she was dead for 11 years, then constantly filmed him while setting him up on "dates" with cross-dressers.
Perry isn't a likable person, but that doesn't excuse what the movie does. What they've done is taken a man's dream, strung him along for eleven years while building up false expectations, and then played them up for cheap (and I mean REALLY CHEAP) laughs. You'd think that if they were going to be such jerks, they might try to come up with something funny to do to him---but instead, all they can come up with is sixth-grade, juvenile humor. Like putting him in a room with an over-the-top gay stereotype, or pretending that they're going to dump feces on him.
There's really only one group of people who could possible think this movie is funny: total ***holes. If you yourself are a complete jerk, then maybe you'll laugh at this. If you think something as stupid and annoying as "Crank Yankers" is funny, then you'll probably like this.
But if you are even remotely human, then you'll probably just end up feeling depressed at the idea of this movie. Whether the movie is real or not doesn't change its badness---even if Perry was in on the joke for the whole movie, the concept of torturing a guy like this is simply not funny.
If you want to know whether or not you'll think this movie is funny, think about this premise: A man dying of AIDS is told by his brother and father that he will be cured if he spends the next two weeks letting people sodomize him with broomsticks on camera. If you think that idea sounds like it would be hilarious, then by all means watch "Windy City Heat." But if you think it sounds cruel, disgusting, and just plain stupid, then stay away from this movie. And congratulations on not being a cynical, mean-spirited jerk.
Drawn Together (2004)
Not so much offensive as it is unfunny
MINOR SPOILERS HEREIN
Why is it that Comedy Central can no longer make shows that are funny? "The Daily Show" and "South Park" are both still doing pretty well, but they were both created years ago. It seems like every attempt the network makes to do something new results in utter failure.
Perhaps it is because they have forgotten one of the major rules of humor: Nothing is inherently funny. No matter what your subject material is or how you present it, you have to have a joke. Jokes involve a build-up and a payoff (punchline)---you can't just throw out a bunch of material and hope that everybody finds it funny.
"Drawn Together" is a perfect example of this. The show features plenty of potentially offensive material and "shocking" moments, but it doesn't really have any comedy in it. Here's an example of one of the longest moments that was supposed to be funny: Clara and Foxxy are in a hot tub. Clara has made unintentionally racist comments about Foxxy. Foxxy proceeds to make out with Clara.
The joke is that they're lesbians. Get it? Perhaps you didn't get it. Maybe I need to capitalize the word. They're LESBIANS. Is it funny now?
Here's another joke: Toot gets sad, and then she decides to cut herself with a razor. Then she says, "Sometimes I cut myself to relieve the pain, tee hee." That's it. There isn't any build up to this, nor is there a punchline---it just happens, and because it's "shocking" and it involves a (really lame) parody of Betty Boop, we're supposed to find it funny?
And one more example: Foxxy's breasts. I wish I could elaborate more on this, but I really can't---her breasts are the "joke." The camera gets a close-up of them, and... well, yeah, that's about it.
I guess another way to put it would be like this: if I was trying to write a "Matrix" parody (I know, it's dated---but so is this show), I could just say the words "Neo" and "Matrix" a lot. "Hey, guess what? The Matrix! Neo!" But that's not funny. If I did something completely twisted with the concept, though, like turning Neo into a gullible twelve year-old while Morpheus was a con artist who just created "The Matrix" as an excuse to get Neo out of his house, then there's some potential for a few laughs. "Drawn Together" is a lot like somebody repeating the words "Matrix" and "Neo" over and over again, hoping that you'll find it funny.
The other major flaw in the show is that its whole premise is pretty stupid.
It's a reality-TV parody featuring cartoon characters. Problem 1: Reality-TV is a parody of itself, so parodying it is redundant. It's like drawing a caricature of a caricature---by the time you see the end result, you get more of a "So what?" response than anything else. Problem 2: The cartoon characters are completely wasted. It might as well have been made with live actors---the fact that they are cartoons is hyped-up as one of the jokes, but because there is nothing particularly special about them, it only serves as a way to cook up a very weak back-story for each character. It might have been funny if each character satirized the world from which they came, but given how completely inept the writers of this show are, I highly doubt that they could've made it work.
On the other hand, if you like it when comedians are lazy and don't actually try to come up with any jokes, you might like this show. Everybody else: stay away!