painkillr Reviews

The Comedian (III) (2016)

De Niro has been phoning it in for decades now.

[2/10 · 12 November 2016]

Ugh, what a waste of time. Quick, what was the last good movie De Niro was in? You could probably only come up with Heat which was way back in 1995. He's fat lazy and uninspired and even though this is a passion project, that comes through clearly here too.

De Niro was a national treasure at one point. His roles in Taxi Driver and Raging Bull still sets the standard for elite acting, but success has extinguished whatever muse once drove him.

He should just stick to small roles like in American Hustle where people don't have to be confronted with his ego and stature. Everything he does, your mind is thinking "OK now De Niro is firing a gun like an idiot without aiming" instead of "OK now (character name) is firing a gun like an idiot".

Sad to see. I hope this never happens to Will Ferrel.

Bachelorette (2012)

i re-watch the ending all the frickin' time

[9/10 · 9 December 2012]

i over-voted this movie, solely for kirsten dunst in the last 3rd of the film. pushy, profane, type A, domineering, she was just plain AWESOME. i found most of the first half of the movie to be kind of frustrating and unrealistic (based upon my observations of women and how they hold weddings to be kind of sacred), but then they let kirsten dunst push the plot forward, bringing everything together, and ultimately lead to a very nice conclusion. the only flaw in the ending involved a cringeworthy performance by adam scott. yeesh.

also, i really wish they had more dancing at the end, it was incredibly charming.

kirsten i forgive you now for not giving a damn in spiderman

Girl Walks Into a Bar (2011)

the best part of the movie was at the end

[6/10 · 20 October 2012]

this movie is small in many ways, the scope is to romanticize the movie by setting it mostly in bars. none of the characters develop in any way, and it seems like the producers have not spent any time in either bars or strip clubs. it was like how an 8th grader might imagine the nightlife of adults

having said that, the actor playing Henry is very charming, alexis bledel is her excruciatingly adorable self even when delivering some fairly awful lines, robert forster nailed his character, amber valletta is so beautiful it hurts even while dressed as a lesbian, and carla gugino's sensuality strides over the whole production

oddly the best part of the movie is the very modest little dance number at the end during the credits. the 3 actors dance with such charm and sincerity that you find yourself wishing you lead a life that served up gorgeous little moments of humanity like this.

but even that is sort of a flaw because it made you realize how much of a waste of time and talent and potential the preceding 90 minutes were

oh also emmanuelle chriqui in a very skimpy outfit gave this movie 2 extra stars

Last Resort (I) (2012–2013)

Disappointing

[28 September 2012]

i am a HUGE fan of Shawn Ryan's The Shield, The Unit, and Terriers so I was anxiously awaiting this show.

unfortunately it falls flat on its face. i couldn't help but keep comparing this movie to Denzel's Crimson Tide, and it fell short in so many ways.

no one in the first ep seemed to have any kind of grasp as to what military protocol is like, or even basic professionalism in a workplace. the clichés were numerous, along with a lack of believable characters.

i am perplexed that this show depicted SEALs in a way that is completely devoid of the realism that we see in Shawn Ryan's The Unit. is it possible that Ryan has no real input into this show?

i don't think this show can be fixed w/o gutting it and leaving only Andre Brauer

Rick (2003)

absolutely awful ending

[1/10 · 8 March 2005]

this movie showed a lot of promise in the beginning, effective in its displays of style, sadism, humor, and even maybe some sensitivity.

but as the film went along, and the ending came within site and it was clear where the film was going, you become angry at the laziness of the filmmakers in devising the ending and also become angry at them for stupidly misusing their artistic gifts (which were on display in this movie) to come to a conclusion that they probably think was iconoclastic but actually was just pathetic.

i registered solely to tell all the potential viewers of this film that if you watch this movie, be prepared to despise everyone involved in this film after the credits role.

so if i'm not being crystal clear here, i hope the director and the writer on this film never are allowed to be involved in any way whatsoever with another movie I lay eyes upon.