astroass34 Reviews

Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Great Job! (2007–2017)

Great Jb!

[10/10 · 21 May 2011]

The person who gave this a 1 star review ("chiefsanch") has absolutely no clue whatsoever what comedy is. He/she had "Abso-Lutely" no business reviewing this show. This show is absurdly brilliant. The sketches are intended to be ridiculous. There isn't another show like it. It's nice to see a comedy show that just lets loose and doesn't try to "tell you it's funny." Tim and Eric Awesome Show, Great Job! allows you to lose your mind and just enjoy the insanity.

So if you enjoy ridiculous FUNNY sketches, this show is for you. Is every sketch funny? No. But that's like with anything. Chances are you don't like every single song on every CD you own. People, like "chiefsanch" have a very narrow mind, and now imagination at all, which is why they gave this show a 1 star. Tim and Eric is a breath of fresh air, and there really isn't another show quite like it. Tim and Eric has a HUGE cult following for a reason- because it's funny.

Futurama (1999– )

Best Show Ever Made

[10/10 · 7 June 2010]

Best show ever made. Don't care what anyone says. I like this show better than ANY other cartoon. It is smart, VERY smart, and extremely funny. People who don't like Futurama are the same people who don't get the jokes, and are the same people who like Aqua Teen Hunger Force- which is a show for emo little 8th grade Hot Topic kids. Never have I watched a smarter show with so much witty humor.I even have a tattoo of the Planet Express ship! I really hate how IMDb makes you write a minimum of 10 lines. There is not much else to say except that you are missing out on a great thing if you have never watched this show. So, with one more line to go, I will say "Good News, Everyone!"

Left 4 Dead 2 (2009 Video Game)

Not bad- but not 10 stars...

[9/10 · 26 December 2009]

This game is pretty good. There are a lot of things I like about it, and a lot of things I don't like. I mean, no game is perfect.

One thing i immediately notice is the game is harder than the first one. I understand that Valve is going for the whole "teamwork" thing, but Easy mode is harder than normal mode on the first one. Not so great if you don't play online, like me. Yes, i have played online a bunch of times, but if it's not with my friends, I hate it. People are jerks online and ruin the fun.

I like how they kept the same weapons as in the first one, but all the new weapons are pretty much the same as the old ones. The grenade launcher really isn't as great as people say it is- but fun nonetheless. I like the Boomer bile, but that's the only new thing you can pick up and throw in the game. I wish they came up with other stuff to go along with the cocktails, pipe bombs, gas cans, gas tanks, and O2 tanks. the same stuff as in the first one.

A major problem I have with the game are the glitches and crashes. A few times a night the game will lose the connection with steam. Reading reviews, i am not the only person to experience this. Also, there are a bunch of glitches- like on the rooftop in the finale of "Hard Rain," where parts of the roof are missing, so it looks like pipe bombs, etc. are floating in mid air. Again, another issue people are facing with this game- at least for the PC.

I am not a huge fan of the characters. I liked the characters in the first one much better.

A few of the campaigns were boring. "Swamp fever" was the same thing every time you left the safe room. Hard rain is kind of half a campaign. I do like that they added more to the levels than in the first, however. But, like in the Carnival for example, they could have added so much more cool stuff- I mean, you're in a carnival and you can play 2 games and walk on a roller coaster. the tunnel of love was horrible because it just went on forever and it was all the same thing.

You can definitely tell Valve rushed this game- they even admitted it. They say that they are working on fixing the problems with the first game, but they have been saying that for almost 3 months now.

I am a huge fan of melee weapons. They are pretty fun. Wish there were more of them. The only one I don't like is the cricket bat.

But all in all, it's still a really fun game, but I definitely would not give it 10 stars- I think 10 stars is just foolish because it doesn't deserve 10 stars. If Left 4 Dead 1 did not exist, I'd give it a 9- but because it's the sequel, and they really didn't jazz it up as much as they could have, I give it an 8. I feel as though they should have spent more time on it. I guess that's the reason why Valve usually does take a long time to release a game.

I give it an 8 because it's a good game, but because L4D1 exists, i can't give it more than an 8. L4D1 gets a 9 from me because it's just a better game. Giving it a 10 is kind of a tad much.

A Sound of Thunder (2005)

Just awful...

[2/10 · 20 December 2009]

The acting was terrible, the cheesy, fake, CHEAP green screen effects were ridiculous, and the creatures were absolutely retarded. The only good thing about this movie was the concept, and the laughs I got from watching such a bad movie- then I became pretty angry because I realized I wasted 4 bucks on renting it. Why would a movie like this ever be in theaters? I know this movie came out almost 5 years ago, but does anyone put any effort into making movies anymore? I am just writing random things to fill up space- because I need ten lines of text in order to publish this review. This next line should just about do it. Annnndddddd there!

Life After People (2008 TV Movie)

I'd Like to see this show turn into a movie

[10/10 · 28 April 2009]

I'd love to see this show become a major movie. I think it'd be pretty damn cool. like if a group of people somehow (i don't know how- i don't write movies) get stuck in the future, when people have died out. maybe the people have to survive and run into destruction, rabid animals, new, weird animals, natural disasters, storms, etc... i don't know, i think it'd be pretty cool... i'm thinking it could be something kind of similar to "the day after tomorrow" but there'd be no other people around. (and no, i don't mean like "i am legend.) i am legend wasn't too great- i think if they could somehow make this into a movie, they could do a whole lot with it. i mean, if they made it into a TV show, then why not?

Quarantine (2008)

Not too bad

[7/10 · 10 October 2008]

Overall, it was a pretty good movie. It entertained me, and it had zombie-like people (well, it was actually a virus, like in 28 days/weeks later- but still, that concept of zombies is always awesome). The camera was pretty shaky at times, which was a bit much, and at the end, Jennifer Carpenter, as hot as she is, got pretty annoying with the screams, crying, and hyperventilating. Kind of wish she would have shut up near the end.

Pretty good jumps, some decent little gore parts- so overall, not a bad movie. I would probably buy it on DVD. Obviously no movie is perfect, and everyone will have their own views, likes, and dislikes. If you look at all the other past horror movies, this one isn't too shabby. Look, a movie entertains you, then it did it's job. That's why it's called "entertainment." Just because some jackass on the street says it sucks, and just because it didn't get many "stars," doesn't mean it's a bad movie. Plenty of "bad movies" have entertained the hell out of me- in turn, making them good movies- to me, at least.

Hostel (2005)

Hostel Just Plain Blew

[3/10 · 7 January 2006]

i can't believe people think this was a good movie. This movie was so ridiculous and so full of crap. i was so excited to see it, and was horribly disappointed when I did. They could have used the 1st half of the movie to do really cool things. If you liked or didn't like Saw 2, at least the very 1st scene was tense and pretty sweet. Hostel was pretty much like watching Euro Trip (which was extremely retarded) and a really bad softcore porno for an hour, followed by really brief SAWish gore. The movie failed to make you forget you were in a movie theater, and make you feel like you were the one in the situations. I would flick on MTV if I wanted to see 3 idiots party for an hour. There was about 1.5 seconds of cool gore out of the 3.4 seconds of it in the entire movie. Eli, I hate you.