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damianfallon5
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True Lies (2023)
Just lies
Literally one of the worst TV shows of all time . It absolutely beggars belief that this ever got made . The acting is awful , the plots are terrible, the tension is comical, but even worse than any of this are the scripts - mere words cannot express how bad they were . Was it in fact written by a group of middle school stoners who had got access to their parents liquor cabinet ? On a positive note , if you are an aspiring actor or would like to get into screenwriting or even simply pitch an idea to a studio , then on your worst day if you have very little talent and you are hungover and receive a blow to the head , you can do better than this .
Silent Witness: Grievance Culture - Part 2 (2024)
A chance missed
It's probably an improvement on season 26 but only slightly and that bar is set so low it hardly matters. Perhaps we should be thankful that a once great show which went massively downhill seems to have bottomed out . But annoyingly there was a golden opportunity to get rid of the truly awful Cara which was missed . A pair of serial killers , who been very successful up to this point , suddenly fumbled like first timers . They actually had her tied up ready to deal the fatal blow which would have improved this show no end but no the audience must tolerate Cara for a while longer . Perhaps it's only a matter of time before the producers see sense and cut their losses with her and Velvey but until then Silent Witness will remain a shadow of its former self.
Bosch: Legacy: Zzyzx (2023)
Opportunity missed
It's a schoolboy error but the writers have messed up . They had to get rid of the albatross around the neck of this series and they failed to take it. Maddie is THE worst thing about this show - in order to save it she has to go. She can move away or the writers can find a more permanent exit for the most annoying woman on TV. This whiney little zero adds absolutely nothing to the show , in fact she's a total drag . It wouldn't be so bad if the viewer could fast forward whenever she comes on but we can't as she's now a major focus of the plot . Overall Legacy has not yet hit the heights of the original but if they cut out the unnecessary characters this could turn out well.
Bosch (2014)
A glaring error
Great show , really loved Bosch, the stories are great , the crimes are interesting, seeing inside the LAPD is fascinating but please get rid of Maddie. She adds absolutely nothing to the show , she's constantly moaning and speaking this new age BS . Annoying daughters are a total cliché on American dramas and Maddie is well up there with the worst - Homeland, 24 and of course Californication . What makes it even worse is the writers have had several chances to kill her off yet for some unknown reason she escapes every time - she's been kidnapped twice by homicidal maniacs who killed everyone else they came across, she was cornered by a mafia hitman with dozens of kills yet sadly Maddie got away . Come on writers , do the decent thing and let Maddie be the victim of a serial killer, perhaps her dad could solve it .
Law & Order: Special Victims Unit: Nightmares in Drill City (2021)
Close to being cancelled
Yet another truly appalling episode for a program with six good seasons but one which has gone steadily downhill ever since . If the " writers " were aiming for virtue signalling, they missed . I say ' writers ' but this drivel could have been cobbled together on the back of a cigarette packet, it really is nauseating how St Olivia and her gang can suddenly jump to a completely baseless conclusion without any evidence simply because a killer flutters their eyelashes. It's also a terrible advert for the NYPD and the American justice system as a whole . If this is how it goes then God help us all . It seems reasonable to suppose this series cannot go on much longer if this is the standard so see it while you can , but view it as a comedy or a spoof.
Jon and Lucy's Odd Couples: Episode #1.1 (2023)
Friends in high places
Any viewers familiar with Meet The Richardsons will recognise this . It's a running joke that the Richardsons are trying to get new shows on television, with themselves as the stars and getting paid the most . And now we have this . It's essentially a spoof of Mr and Mrs , the problem is it looks so amateurish, like they had got so desperate to get on television they cobbled this together in one afternoon. Although to be fair Jon goes along with the recurring joke of people being baffled on how an attractive woman could possibly be interested in him , by getting guests on who are in the same boat , Pasha and Richard are also punching well above their weight . The whole thing proceeds in an amiable enough way, the problem is that the hosts are professional comedians working with scripts and the guests are not comedians and seem to have no advance warning of what is going to happen and are not quick enough to respond. It's a passable way to spend an hour , but it remains surprising that this ever got made , evidently the hosts are big enough names to persuade Channel Four .
Ridley (2022)
Painting by numbers
Oh dear ! Adrian Dunbar what have you done ? This is bad , and not in a good way - it's just bad . Every single cliché in the TV detective handbook is brought out . Our hero is very troubled , he's known personal tragedy , so tragic it's made him drink and move to a strange cabin in the woods so he's very difficult to track down . He co-owns a bar and just drops in to talk about the meaning of life with the owner , he plays the piano when he's not playing music at home - of course it's jazz played on vinyl records on a turntable. His boss doesn't really want him and they clash . Literally every scene puts you in mind of other programmes that you've seen a thousand times . In fact the most fun you can have watching this derivative tripe is to play a game where you name the old shows the writers of Ridley have stolen ideas from , so far I've got Bosch , The Killing , Morse , Endeavour , Vera , Broadchurch , The Bay and Dublin Murders . Maybe you can add to the list , it's more entertaining than watching this unoriginal show .
The Split: Episode #3.1 (2022)
Dressed up soap
Take out Nicola Walker and Stephen Mangan and you have nothing more than basic , cheesy soap . However it's dressed up as serious, sophisticated drama which would not fool a five year old . The leads are excellent but are badly let down by the rest , especially the other two sisters who seem to be either reading off cue cards or simply trying to make up the plot as they go along . The once interesting weekly cases have now been set aside for ever more ludicrous ' twists ' that can be spotted a mile away . It's a pity because this could have been a really good series but has been badly mishandled.
Breeders: No Power Part II (2021)
Drop in standards
The second series ended with more a whimper than a bang . Series 1 seemed a good , solid start to be built upon , but this hasn't happened . If anything it's been disappointing , there have been laughs but not as many . The series has gone down a cul-de-sac with the nonsense about Luke's supposed " illness " . Regular viewers would no doubt , have cheered if one or both his parents had murdered him . Indeed this seems to be the only way the writers can extricate themselves, having created TV's most hated ever character . He really is unremittingly awful , he spoils every scene he's in and the ludicrous way he's dealt with , lessens the series as a whole .
Breeders (2020)
Smiles rather than belly laughs
The first series was a good solid start. The dialogue is often witty and clever and the pace is just about right . The main character played by Martin Freeman is head and shoulders the best part of it , he really does hold the whole thing together and all the best bits revolve around him . The wife is much less important and indeed realistic and only shines in scenes with her boss - the pace excellent Patrick Baladi , other secondary characters are hit and miss , a bit like the entire show . The neighbour is good , as are Paul's parents but the wife's parents we could live without . But all these pale into insignificance compared to the son - surely the single most irritating character in TV history , so annoying that the entire audience must have been praying for him to be killed off from encephalitis in the finale . Sadly he recovered and will no doubt return to infuriate in season two . There are laughs to be had here but even with one eye clearly on the American market it's no 'Episodes ' but a passable way to spend half an hour.
Trial & Retribution: Trial & Retribution VI - Part One (2002)
Laughably bad
From start to finish this is a lesson in how not to produce a TV thriller . It's easy to mock the hammy acting , which is by itself the worst you'll ever see in a mainstream TV drama on a major channel with a decent budget , but the " actors " are really let down by a truly appalling script , the dialogue seems to have been written by a small child who has no knowledge of police procedure or indeed human nature .
The main plot does not work in any way - a half witted yokel who is shown kidnapping a woman in front of her children , but maybe his brother did it ? He's also a yokel but with a completely different accent . But what really sets this apart for sheer awfulness are the subplots , Walker trying to teach himself computers , then his exwife who has a new boyfriend , who for no apparent reason turns into a foaming nutcase , then there's Walker's much younger brother who has never been mentioned before because he's the black sheep but of course his Ma still loves him . This character alone must rank as the most comically ( unintentional ) awful of all time in the history of British television ,kids in drama school please watch this " portrayal " and try to do better - if you can't , then give up .
The story eventually resolves itself , and the audience is mightily relieved , yet annoyed at wasting so much time . This isn't to say you shouldn't watch this ,you really should watch - it is simply so laughably bad ,whilst simultaneously portraying itself as good quality drama , you can feel better about yourself safe in the knowledge that on your worst day you could write a better script and stand out as the best actor in this . So bad , it's completely brilliant