jbhiller Reviews

Space Wars: Quest for the Deepstar (2022)

Too Many Clothes

[11 February 2024]

The women are way over-dressed. Should have been a porno. A good example of a porno space opera is Flesh Gordon from 1974. It looks like all the women are from the WWE.

It is amazing how cheap special effects are now available. The CGI space effects were good. There is even a monster planet that would make Ray Harryhausen proud.

The only thing this movies lacks is a plot. The writing is not bad enough to be funny. The actors take the movie too seriously. Anahit Setian stands out as the geeky sidekick. It could have been the new Spaceballs.

Why can't someone make a good space opera. The special effects are now available to any.

The Glass Slipper (1955)

Should have been Completely a Ballet Movie

[7/10 · 3 January 2024]

The plot makes little sense and the Price is way too old. Not a great adaptation of the familiar story of Cinderella. Most of the acting is wooden except for Leslie Caron. It didn't have the magic that this fairytale needed.

With that said, what is great about the film is the dancing and the music. It is magical when Caron is dancing the film goes to another level. The Ballet de Paris elevates the dance scenes. I wish they had dumped the movie script and just made a ballet version of the story.

One bit of trivia. Before movie stardom Leslie Caron was a ballerina along with her friend Bridget Bardot.

Rebel Moon - Part One: A Child of Fire (2023)

Rebel Moon - The real Clone Wars

[6/10 · 23 December 2023]

I just watched Rebel Moon. It is the real Clone Wars. Everything in it is a clone of something else. Mostly, it's Star Wars with the darkness of Blade Runner. The main characters are a Princess Leah, a Han Solo (a clone of Hugh Jackman), a handsome version of Darth Vader and, of course, an evil emperor. The monsters look like they were designed by Ray Harryhausen. There is the evil empire from Star Wars and Dune and, of course, a rebellion. When the Jedi warrior took out her light sabers I had to laugh. There was a Millenium Falcon, and all the spaceships looked like U-Boats.

It starts out on an Irish version of Tatooine. It moves to a city out of Blade Runner. There is a battle for the Death Star. There is the battle between Luke and Darth Vader, only this time Luke wins. Finally, the Fellowship of the Ring rides off into the distance waiting for the next part of the trilogy.

Du Barry Was a Lady (1943)

Wartime Entertainment

[2 August 2023]

Most of the reviews here are not great, but I think they are missing the purpose for this movie. I saw it recently on Lucille Ball day on TCM.

The year was 1943 in the middle of WW II. Millions of young men were fighting for theirs and our lives. This movie was meant to entertain them in very difficult times. This colorful movie is brimming with beautiful women in striking dresses. Also, included was a variety of pop radio musicians of the time, including Tommy Dorsey and His Orchestra (featuring Buddy Rich and Ziggy Elman), Dick Haymes, Jo Stafford, The Pied Pipers, and Six Hits and a Miss. Dancing was provided by Gene Kelly with comedy by Red Skelton, Rags Ragland and a young Zero Mostel. Virginia O'Brien's performance of "Salome" was a standout.

Lucy was at her loveliest though her comic talents had yet to be discovered. She was a pinup girls for the G. I.'s.

One sad note. I think this may have been the last movie some of our soldiers ever saw. I hope this entertained them.

It's a Big Country: An American Anthology (1951)

Make America Great Again?

[3/10 · 10 July 2023]

This movie is a fantasy of an America that never was. There is no hate in this America. Everybody is happy and successful no matter their background. I was surprised that this propaganda movie was made in 1951, after WW II.

1. The worst problem is that your Hungarian daughter has married a Greek.

2. All black people are either judges or sports stars but they should not be able to vote.

3. The worst problem seniors face is that they weren't counted in the Census.

4. Everybody in America goes to Church and everyone respects every other religion.

5. Italians don't wear glasses.

This is the Great America that never existed that politicians want to go back to.

Avatar: The Way of Water (2022)

Dances with Aliens

[8/10 · 3 July 2023]

I finally got around to seeing Avatar: The Way of Water. I had to wait because of the length of the film.

First and foremost, the visuals were stunning as you would expect.

After that I realized that this movie followed the storyline of Dances with Wolves. They both were examples of a noble primitive race under fire by cruel invading colonists. The Tulkun (whales) were the Tatonka (buffalo.)

The big difference was the endings. In Dances with Wolves, the Native Americans can be seen being marginalized and we know that there is no hope for their old way of life. In Avatar the struggle continues. We know from the first movie that the invaders can be defeated. We will have to wait another 13 years to find out.

The Big Hangover (1950)

Hair of the Dog

[4/10 · 19 June 2023]

This Big Hangover gives the audience a big hangover. There are several problems with this film.

First, with a title like "The Big Hangover" you would normally think that this is a comedy. There are no big laughs.

Next, the Hair of the Dog is significant because there is a talking dog in the movie. Once again, no laughs.

Next, in 1950 Van Johnson was 35 years old, and Elizabeth Taylor was 17.

Next, while always beautiful, Liz Taylor at 17 is completely unconvincing as an adult psychologist.

Finally, the concept of PTSD was not yet recognized in 1950. Obviously, many WW II veterans were suffering from PTSD and this movie does not take that seriously. If you want to see a good movie about WW II PTSD watch "The Best Years of Our Lives."

A Man Called Otto (2022)

A Live Action remake of the Disney Movie Up

[9/10 · 9 June 2023]

Bitter old man who just lost his wife is transformed into a human being by friends. Many flashbacks to his memories of his wife. Old man tries to leave everything behind. "A Man Called Otto" or "Up"?

Both are remakes of the fantastic original film adaptation of the novel "A Man Called Ove" by Fredrik Backman (2015 Swedish film "A Man Called Ove" directed by Hannes Holm). Ove is a curmudgeon-the kind of man who points at people he dislikes as if they were burglars caught outside his bedroom window. He has staunch principles, strict routines, and a short fuse. People call him 'the bitter neighbor from hell.'

Tom Hanks or Ed Asner?

Cat or dog?

Suicide or balloon house?

Touching flashbacks or touching intro?

One hankie or two?

A Midsummer Night's Dream (1935)

This is a good candidate for colorization

[9/10 · 28 April 2023]

I miss color.

It is great to see classic Hollywood actors do Shakespeare. I love when they are all allowed to overact. Jimmy Cagney and a 14 year-old Mickey Rooney really are allowed to let go. Dick Powell was in fine voice.

Korngold's adaptation of Mendelssohn is refreshing. The tempos are a bit faster than you usually hear but that adds to the energy.

From Wikipedia: Many of the actors in this version never had performed Shakespeare and would not do so again, especially Cagney and Brown, who were nevertheless highly acclaimed for their performances. Many critics agreed that Dick Powell was miscast as Lysander, and Powell concurred with the critics' verdict.

I could not find the choreographer who did a fine job. The early special effects were good, too. The first fairy scene was impressive with flying effects.

Start the Revolution Without Me (1970)

Missing Something

[22 April 2023]

It is missing Mel Brooks. He must have been familiar with this film before making History of the World Part II.

I kept saying to myself, "It's good to be the King!" over and over again.

Though Gene Wilder was at his antic best, I kept missing the other Mel Brooks actors. Marty Feldman would have been the perfect other Corsican Brother. Harvey Korman would have been the perfect Duke d'Escargot. Madeline Kahn would have been a great Queen Marie Antoinette. It was jarring to see Donald Sutherland playing an idiot.

The movie seemed to be an SNL skit that went on too long.

Repeat after me, "It's good to be the King!"

Wild Boys of the Road (1933)

If this film were made today it would have to be in Spanish

[9/10 · 11 April 2023]

As I was watching this movie about poverty and homelessness in the depths of the Great Depression. It's about desperate people trying to find a better life. I thought that it would be difficult for me to identify with these kids. I felt it was long ago and far away.

Then I thought, the same thing is happening today at our borders. The same desperate people are trying to find a better life. Many of these people left everything behind and went on harrowing journeys. They miss their families but have to keep going forward. Like in the movie, they are not treated well when they got here and have to live in poverty.

That is why I say that.i this film were made today it would have to be in Spanish.

Gandahar (1987)

I was waiting for the Beatles to show up

[9/10 · 29 January 2023]

Both in terms of design and story, I thought this was a serious version of Yellow Submarine. It was made in 1988, 20 years after Yellow Submarine but has a similar feel. Both feature surrealistic worlds that may have been inspired by Salvatore Dali.

The stories are similar as well. Both feature fantastic idealistic peaceful worlds that have been taken over by an authoritarian monster. In both, the monster is defeated and then the worlds return to their peaceful states.

The difference, of course, is the tone. Yellow Submarine is lighthearted and comical while Gandahar is deadly serious. Also in Yellow Submarine the story is nonsense created to highlight the Beatles music and cannot stand on its own.

Both are very beautiful.

Exception (2022– )

Great Visuals. Weak Story

[8/10 · 17 December 2022]

This is a beautiful work of Art. The intro is mesmerizing. The story is not as strong.

I have felt this way in the past. There was a Disney film called the Black Hole from 1979. I am a Science Fiction fan. For that era the visuals and actors were great, but the story was Disneyfied and weak. I feel the same way about Tron. I was disappointed.

I feel the same way about Exception. It is supposed to take place in the far future, but a lot of contemporary objects, like smart phones, were used. The story was too philosophical as well.

There are a lot of the plot was also derivative. There are two main influences. The first was obviously the original Alien - a monster abord a spaceship. The film makers would certainly be aware of that.

The other influence is just speculation ... the Netflix series 1899. Were the Exception filmmakers aware of 1899? Much of that series takes place aboard a ship. There are implanted memories and an interstellar migration of mankind as well.

I have watched this series for the beautiful images but I don't take the plot seriously.

In the Dark (2019–2022)

I Hate This Show

[3/10 · 13 October 2022]

The main character is completely unconvincing as a blind person. She always looks you right in the eye when she talks to you. I've seen her carry a cane, but I've never seen her use it. She has a guide dog, but rarely uses it. I also find her unlikeable and can't see why everyone on the show loves her.

The story is unbelievable as well. Murphy, a blind person, was thrown in prison rather than a jail waiting for a bail hearing. The prison seemed to be co-ed and only had male guards.

The show is ultra-violent with no redeeming characters. Everyone, including Murphy, are either drug dealers, murderers or dirty cops. The characters are always whining or angry.

My wife has been binge watching this show and I am miserable.

The Kissing Bandit (1948)

Could Have Been a Great Movie - If it had starred Danny Kaye

[4/10 · 9 October 2022]

This is one of Sinatra's early movies and it shows. It marked the end of Sinatra's Juvenile acting career. Danny Kaye would have taken over this movie and make it memorable. The plot is similar to The Inspector General.

There some musical highlights.

Kathryn Grayson's performance in Love is Where You Find It is wonderful and shows that she should have been an opera star.

Watch it on YouTube.

The other highlight is the Dance of Fury sequence. How great it is to see Cyd Charisse and Ann Miller dancing together even though Ricardo Montalban just stood there looking pretty. It is the absolute highlight of the movie.

Watch it on YouTube.

The Poison Rose (2019)

Was this supposed to be a Spoof?

[31 July 2022]

It had every Film Noir cliche in the book. I was waiting for the Maltese Falcon to show up. Pretty girl shows up at the PI's office.

That being said, it was a fun spoof. There is a scene in the park where a mime shows up.

The Princess (I) (2022)

Don't Overthink This Movie. It is a Kung Foo Movie

[8/10 · 2 July 2022]

She is a female Bruce Lee revenge movie or is she Xena Warrior Princess.

Another way of looking at it is that is a game of Dungeons and Dragons.

"You are a warrior Princess imprisoned in a Tower with many rooms and secret passages. Your task is to escape the tower and rescue the kingdom from an evil usurper."

I see the Dungeon Master throwing the dice between each of the many action sequences.

Where are the Jedi's light Sabers?

Girl Power!

Meltdown: Three Mile Island (2022)

Were There Re-Creations?

[6 May 2022]

Were any of the events shown in this series Re-Creations? Were all the characters in the documentary the real people or were some of them actors? There is no cast list here on the IMDB.

The first 3 episodes are fact oriented and were a little dry. The last episode is very dramatic.

Down to Their Last Yacht (1934)

Where is King Kong When We Need Him?

[14 January 2022]

This is what Racism looks like.

First, this is about feeling sorry for rich people during the Depression.

There is a white Queen of a Polynesian island.

There is rampant Sexism.

Out of Death (2021)

Die Hard in the Forrest

[3/10 · 15 October 2021]

This is the same movie Bruce Willis has been making for 35 years. This movie is just another version of Die Hard except this is not in a skyscraper. It was disappointing because he has done some good work in the past.

The Bite (2021)

Best Zom-Com Ever!

[9/10 · 24 June 2021]

It's Twilight meets the Hunger Games. I love New York.

The Great Lover (1931)

So Tacky It's Funny

[8/10 · 21 February 2021]

Every cliche in the book. I even heard a character say, "Come up and see my etchings."

In this early talkie the actors still think they are in the silent era. Adolph Menjou is horribly miscast as a latin lover.

The singing is only passable.

Varsity Show (1937)

Skip the Dialog

[9/10 · 8 February 2021]

Fast forward through the dialog and just watch the wonderful musical numbers.

An Imperfect Murder (2017)

The Music was Great.

[2/10 · 6 February 2021]

Just get rid of the movie. They should have stuck with the Brahms Requiem.

Dances with Wolves (1990)

As the Tragic Year of 2020 Comes to an End...

[10/10 · 27 December 2020]

I watched DWW again after many years. It is good to be reminded of history to put 2020 in perspective. We will recover but the Native Americans never will even though they were more worthy.