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speiglewill
Reviews
End of the Road (2022)
Laughably Dumb
Starts decently, then descends into some of the most painful to watch scenes of unrealistic character decisions, contrived and predictable situations, and some of the most hilarious white racist stereotypes that I've seen since a Family Guy Spike Lee parody.
Latifah and Luda deserve way better roles than what was written for them by those hacks that the studio hired. I was laughing every 5 minutes or less at how many dumb things kept happening. There was actual promise in the plot if somebody had written it properly. Well, except for that "big" twist that was obvious from the start. Question: If a major highway gets detoured through a little used stretch, then where are all of the other cars that got detoured as well? That is but one of many plotholes that curse this lackluster attempt. At least I got some giggles out of it though.
Relaxer (2018)
Should've done my taxes instead
I know that there is some kind of subtle social commentary going on here, however it is entirely beyond me. Apparently I'm too stupid to understand this "smart" movie. The trailer was funny but also a mirage to how boring, pointless. And ultimately time draining Relaxer is.
Stuart: A Life Backwards (2007)
Slowly Disarms You As It Progresses
This started off as a boring and basic tv movie. As a fan of both the leads, I found myself underwhelmed by their performances. However, slowly but surely, I started to care for the characters and the story that was being told. Come to think of it, the storytelling is similar to how many of us treat homeless people off of first appearances. It's easy to be indifferent when we know nothing of that person, yet when we get a glimpse of their struggle and what brought them there, it can be an eye opener. Too bad the budget couldn't have been bigger and the story more time to be told. Regardless, I found myself thinking about this film long afterwards.
Jerry Maguire (1996)
Only Crowe Can Make Mid-Life Crises and Romance Blend So Well
Still endearing, still entertaining, and still hilarious all these years later. I'm not much of a "chick flick" kind of guy, yet this hits all the right notes of sentimentality and a personal soft spot for me. I pity those who can't feel the joy of watching these characters struggle and then find themselves when taking a chance on each other. The payoff is great, regardless of how cheesy it can seem to some. Jerry Maguire is a continual classic to be enjoyed by all, even you cynics.
The Guardians of Justice (2022)
It Ain't For Everybody
This is an intentionally over the top, audacious, and overall fun series to watch. Sure, it isn't as creative, hilarious, and badass as Kung Fury, however the explosion of 80's and 90's pop culture mishmashing style is worth a watch for that certain crowd. I really don't understand the hate that this is getting on here, especially from those who haven't even made it past an episode or two. Maybe I'm the weirdo here, but I had a good time with a smile on my face from start to finish.
Cannons: Bad Dream (2021)
Hilarious 80's slasher throwback video
Short, sweet, and to the point. This video tells a story and keeps the 80's synthpop vibes going all the way through. The kidnapper dancing to the beat is a highlight that gives me the chuckles with every viewing. This band and the director nail it, big time.
Cannons: Fire for You (2020)
Gives the feels like no other
A great song is made that way when accompanied by a killer video. The look, the feel, the texture, all hit the mark. The scenes compliment every verse and beat. There's even a touch of humor near the end that shows the camaraderie of the bandmates. I could watch this all day. Bravo, Cannons!!!
Cowboy Bebop (2021)
The effort has room for future potential
Looks great and has a certain quirky spirit that the anime had. I like the story divergence from doing exactly what has been done before. Since these are real actors, it makes sense that there needs to be a little humanity to them. Vicious is the only disappointing character so far, in that the live action version contradicts what made the animated version so scary and methodical. The Vicious here is a spoiled, impulsive brat that can't be taken seriously nor respected. I'm glad that they made room for more seasons since there needs to be a better connection with the characters and so that the actors have more time to biild their chemistry with each other. I would've liked a bit more fun with certain aspects, however overall I like the direction that this is going. Also, this far better done than those insulting live action Deathnote and Attack On Titan films were.
How to Fix a Drug Scandal (2020)
Fascinating But Flawed
This is obviously a one sided documentary that understandably vilifies the corrupt prosecutors, yet exaggerates the victimization of the perpetrators and prosecuted. The vast majority of these people were guilty, regardless of the evidence tampering. They got off on a very reasonable technicality, but don't play sad music and try to distract us from the fact these people should be accountable for their choices. We've all seen the After School Specials and know exactly how drugs ruin communities. There is a bigger issue here about the gargantuan failure that is the war on drugs and the obvious cracks in the justice system, but this Doc keeps things fairly intimate and stretches the story to about two episodes too long. I enjoyed this very much, however don't ask me to condemn one side while also asking me to sympathize for the other when all are wrong on one level or another
Star Wars: Episode IX - The Rise of Skywalker (2019)
Keep expectations low, and you may just enjoy yourself
STAR WARS: EPISODE IX - THE RISE OF SKYWALKER-
With this newest trilogy, I normally returned multiple times to the theaters for a couple of reasons. One was that I wanted to see the films after my initial expectations had died down, and also because I actually enjoyed the films themselves. I mean STAR WARS is just as big now as it has always been, regardless of the lovers, the haters, and the in-betweeners. I saw THE FORCE AWAKENS four times, THE LAST JEDI TWICE, and THE RISE OF SKYWALKER only once. I still highly enjoy TFA, but TLJ has only gotten worse for me through multiple home viewings. It actually borderlines on boring and damn near pointless, to be honest. With THE RISE OF SKYWALKER, I honestly planned to see it again. However after a couple of weeks to think about it, I don't care if I ever see it again. I've spent enough money on Disney's halfassery (my word, copyrighted) for the forseeable future.
THE RISE OF SKYWALKER is for lack of a more descriptive term, a big jumbled watchable mess. It doesn't honor any of its characters properly (aside from Carrie Fisher's), and it handles pre-established plotlines by lightly touching on them or completely ignoring them altogether. There are way too many characters, and very little for them to do except nod to a conversation and then step aside for another one's brief appearance. I don't hate what has been done here, but like a father who has been let down by his highly talented children, I'm just disappointed and ultimately underwhelmed. What's odd though, is that THE RISE OF SKYWALKER is never boring. It's a high energy distraction from all of the weak and lazy writing that tries to balance a story that never gets any justice. The character of Rey has advanced in such a short time to having full on FORCE UNLEASHED powers, that not even Yoda came close to having in EMPIRE. Oh, and the cheap, ten year old child writer's excuse for why she's so powerful, is laughable at best. She hasn't earned it throughout this series and nobody is going to convince me otherwise. Everybody else takes a back seat to her, and the whole thing suffers because of it. The only character who has remained consistently written this whole time is Kylo Ren. It just sucks that not enough was given to him after the events of TFA. The reasoning for the return of the Emperor was also mediocre. There was a really good story in there for him if capable hands had been involved. Instead, he's just the baddie of the moment, there to growl and look scary with little purpose than what was fed to us.
In spite of my irritations with this movie, I have to give props to Director J.J. Abrams for taking over the monumental task of keeping THE RISE OF SKYWALKER from crashing into complete irrelevance. He had to steer the storyline back onto the path that he established with TFA before Rian Johnson monkeywrenched it in TLJ, while also trying to please all of the fans in the process. I can't even imagine how difficult that must have been for him to attempt. Because this movie could have turned out far worse than it did. Now, if any of you enjoyed this film and all of the fan service that it provided, then I am truly happy for you. But for me, I hold STAR WARS to a certain standard, and if they are going to play scattershot with this iconic franchise, then I am unable to be so forgiving. Hell, despite its many flaws, George Lucas's prequel trilogy actually looks far more grounded and planned out than this one and, it always felt like STAR WARS. This one, not always. Now that this trilogy is over, I pray to the Gods of Life Day that those executives pull their collective heads out of each other's asses, find the right people for the job (THE MANDOLORIAN showrunners are a great example), and let them do what they do best; not try to give medals four decades later to cover up any current inadequacies.