slopi_serv Reviews

The Darkroom (2006)

Decent, Not What I Would Call 'Horror' Though

[7/10 · 3 January 2007]

Aside from the main character's visions of monsters and gore, I would have to say this is a thriller. Pretty original plot concept and good acting as well.

The story follows a man who is offered an experimental drug in hopes that he can remember why he was found on the side of the road covered in blood. The movie then leads you into his journey of finding these memories.

Nice twist at the end, though I have a feeling most people will know what that twist is about 10 minutes before it happens, but it doesn't distract from the effect.

Overall it's original, I like the concept, the actors were well suited and nothing really seemed out of place. A couple goofs here and there due to shoddy editing possibly, again, nothing that really distracts from the quality of the story. I rate this a 7/10. I give it 7 instead of 6 because of the lack of recognizable actors and how well the roles were played.

Containment (2006 Video)

Yawn! Since when was I back in Highschool?

[1/10 · 18 December 2006]

Lets start with saying I'm glad I saw this for free...

The acting in this 'movie' comes off as more than amateurish. It feels like (and sounds like) the actors were pulled from their school classes to go make a film in someone's office. Did this film even leave the office? Who knows, I couldn't watch it that long.

If you have the unfortunate opportunity to watch this flop, you'll notice that it seems to of been shot all with hand-held cameras. Please show these people a tri-pod. Also, wait until the first phone conversation. Is the wife leaving a message? Oh wait no, that's just completely unnatural dialog that makes it sound like both actors are reading straight from cue-cards.

Now to try to find a remedy for this headache that I got from watching less than 5min of this

The Plague (2006 Video)

Campy Horror Flick

[3/10 · 25 August 2006]

Now, I'm not sure what Clive Barkers involvement was with this film, but it couldn't of been much. The plot is like thin ice with plenty of cracks in it.

OK, so these kids suddenly go into a coma for 10 years, with no reason given. Then they wake up and are hell-bent on killing everyone that's not like them. Now, I only marked this as having a spoiler tag, because everything I just said is the entire film.

The ending answers no questions as to why or how these kids wind up the way they did. No resolution with the adults and no real understanding about the events. I'd be almost willing to watch Village of the Damned again before I see this, because at least that movie gave a reason to why the kids went 'crazy'.

And as usual, I'm sure people will disagree with me, but those people obviously don't understand what an opinion means. If you liked this POS, great, fine for you, but for logical thinkers and people who like to see why and hows OR EVEN A PLOT, do yourself a favor and skip this one.

I rarely give movies a 1/10, but this one earned it hard.

Jarhead (2005)

A Throw-away War Movie for the "Pop Generation"

[2/10 · 9 July 2006]

I thought this movie was nothing short of a slap in the face to everyone who has, or is currently in the U.S. armed services. I know the movie mostly focused on Marines, but I'm sure the writers of this trash would blankly apply the same thoughts to all branches.

I am not, nor have I ever been enrolled in any armed services. I am neither republican nor democrat. To see this movie portray most every marine as borderline psychopaths who are socially and romantically retarded, implying that the only reason they serve in the forces is because there's nothing else they're capable of but pulling a trigger... it did nothing but leave a sour taste in my mouth and make me realize how biased Hollywood is, and how much they really don't care about who they trash.

So, to all you news-fed, brainwashed 'livestock' of today's generation, feel free to praise this movie and think it's nothing short of spectacular, but by no means believe this is an honest representation of our armed services. If anything, view this as a parody at best.