brian-tipton Reviews

[Rec]² (2009)

A Rare Treat

[9/10 · 6 March 2010]

It's so rare that I see a sequel to a horror movie that's worth a damn, that I felt like I had to review this one out of respect.

It starts moments after the events of the first film and if you watched them in succession, it would seem like one long, brilliantly conceived nightmare.

Once again, all elements are firing on all cylinders. The acting is excellent, the makeup and effects are horrifying and completely believable, the direction and cinematography are dazzling.

Sure there are is a plot point or two that beg belief, but even those are pulled off with successful gusto. You really are sucked right back into the hellish limbo that is the apartment building. The story zigs and zags with a larger cast of characters and sub-plots that are genuinely engaging. It even has a moment or two of real laugh out loud comedy in between scenes of true horror.

Probably my favorite horror film of the year, which is saying a lot since I thought the first Rec. was the best horror film of that year as well. I really hope they stay away from making a Quarantine 2, because the first one, though an almost shot for shot remake of Rec, was terrible. The director and writers have somehow captured lightning in a bottle, and I can't wait to see how the 3rd one pans out. Terrific film.

Zone of the Dead (2009)

Crap dipped in crap

[2/10 · 6 March 2010]

Oh Ken Foree, how I long to see you and Tony Todd team up for a buddy zombie actioner. This kind of tripe is beneath you. From the terrible dialog to the ridiculous metalcore soundtrack, this Eastern European production is almost unwatchable. Any actor involved in this should re- consider a different career, maybe the culinary arts. I'm imagining the script in my head, don't ask me why, and it probably reads better than it plays on screen. I'd easily put this on the lower end of all zombie movies. Even though English is spoken through the whole movie, it seems like a bad dub. Here's a line of the dialog "Call me Dragon", "nice to meet you Mr. Dragon", "No, just Dragon, haaaahaaha". Seriously.

The Descent: Part 2 (2009)

Inferior Sequel

[5/10 · 5 March 2010]

Somehow, they've managed to crap all over the mystery and wonder of the first film. I wouldn't have thought that possible, but here's two hours worth of what basically amounts to the same movie with different angles. There's a fine line between horror and annoyance, and the difference is evident between the original film and this sequel. The first had some great character development, witty dialogue, an intriguing plot. All of those things have been substituted for B-movie versions of same. Huge plot holes, impossible scenarios, expositional dialogue, and an ending that makes both films seem pointless. Don't even get me started on why there is light in some of the caves deep underground.

The Lovely Bones (2009)

All Over The Map

[6/10 · 3 January 2010]

I gotta say I didn't like it at all. Disjointed barely covers it, and watching Marky Mark flounder all over what would have been the pivotal role if cast differently, is facepalm worthy.

The girl is the best actor among them and she barely has anything to do but look forlorn for 2 hours. Tucci is decent, although the whole plot is blown wide open 10 minutes into the movie so his presence is pretty trite when it should be menacing.

Susan Sarandon plays it well, but her character has SOO many quirks that it's hard to find a human center in her.

The plot is even more obvious than you think, and the narrative flow is all over the map, not to mention the time frames involved are really hard to figure out.

I'd give it a 6 out of 10.

Oral Fixation (2009)

Second Rate

[4/10 · 6 October 2009]

As an independent film, it's not bad. As a film in general, it's pretty un-watchable. The script isn't so bad, but the actors' delivery of it is awful. It's your basic psycho girl going ga-ga for a guy scenario, and waaayy down that list as well. No atmosphere, and each of the characters take turns being the dumbest person on screen. They make choices that none of us in our right mind would ever make. In the modern cinematic world, having to say "Don't Go In There!" or trying to understand why a man in love with his wife (who is already supremely jealous and suspicious) would blatantly say he can't have lunch with her and then let his wife hear the psycho on his end of the phone saying "Fuck me again Paul" even though he hates this woman and wants her out of his office and would never have sex with her. Another thing, for him being so faithful and wanting this crazy woman out of his office, he sure lets her hang around an incredibly long time. Just dumb storytelling.