Change Your Image
bgordon555
Reviews
Cave of Forgotten Dreams (2010)
Glorious link to a forgotten past
It's hard to comprehend in this day and age of smart phones and Wikipedia what life was like about 30,000 years ago when these paintings were made. But the glimpse we have of them here, and the tenuous attempts by archaeologists and art historians to piece understand them provided me with a new perspective on our history and the human experience.
I applaud everyone involved in this film. To say much more is only a feeble attempt to put sentiments into words that surely miss their mark.
A few comments about the 3D. While the technology could, perhaps, have been better used, the 3D truly brings out the sense of depth that the artists used themselves in their paintings. And this effect that you get of the shadows and depths would be missed if seen only in 3D. In 3D, however limited it is, you get the full impact. At least it is refreshing to sit in a movie theater, experience 3D and not have arrows or other projectiles thrown at you. Although, it may have provided a vivid experience of the subjects of the paintings as opposed to those who made them.
It's clear in the film that some of the speakers are not polished actors. There are a few moments of awkward silences and other puzzled expressions. But these, to me, only enhanced the charm of the film, as it also spoke to what it means to be a human being.
Alice in Wonderland (2010)
Not much of a muchness
With all the special effects, and erstwhile efforts of the cast, this version of Alice in Wonderland is a bore.
They took a book about SOMEthing, and turned it into NOthing. The original was a satire about language and thinking and about how society creates so much of a something about nothing.
And they took a knife to the story and butchered it for 2010 social tastes, because the idea of social ideology as a meaningless construct is 21st century heresy. Worse, even, than in Carroll's time. At least THEY had a Carroll to point out the inanity of it all! The plot device of Alice fighting the Jabberwocky was stupid and revolting at the same time. Alice was FAR more a heroine when she used her wits than a sword to emerge victorious.
Must everything be mangled into a video game?
Knowing (2009)
Train Wreck of a Movie
Stupid movie. That's really all that needs to be said. Pitiful waste of music -- Jupiter by Holst and the 2nd movement of Beethoven's 7th.
Monstrous acting. Ridiculous plot. There is just SO much wrong with this movie, there's no point delving into the details.
All I can say is it's made for Bible Thumpers who want a dash of science thrown in.
The ONLY decent part of the movie was the kid who played Caleb. He's the reason for 2 instead of 1 stars. He did the only credible acting, until the final scene, and then he got ground up along with everyone else in pitiful schmaltz.
Disgusting movie. Everyone except the kid should have their SAG card revoked.
A Royal Scandal (1945)
Oh my goodness...and what goodness!
I just saw this gem of a movie as I was channel-surfing and came across it tonight on Turner Classic Movies. I knew nothing about the film, even less about the luminaries who made it except that one of the stars was Tallulah Bankhead. An enigma wrapped in a legend, I had heard about her since forever, but never had the opportunity to see her in her prime. What a surprise! I can't remember the last time I laughed so hard during a movie. I am SO tired of stupidity and over-the-top absurdity masquerading as comedy! I don't understand what's so funny about either. Give me wit, subtlety, irony, and understated comedic acting any day.
Perhaps this movie came out at the wrong time. The published date of 1946 must have been a time when tensions were building between the US and the Soviet Union, so I wonder how open the American audience would have been to the antics of pre-revolution Russia. And it doesn't sound as if Bankhead and the Hollywood press were the best of friends. But from this vantage point, this is one TIMELESS classic that will be enjoyed for what it's worth long after the silliness of today's comedies are seen as witless goofballs.
What a shame Bankhead made so few movies, and William Eythe was taken from us so young! They both gave masterful performances and one totally underrated gem of a movie!
One Potato, Two Potato (1964)
Alternate Universe: America 1964
After finishing some errands, I happened to catch One Potato, Two Potato on Turner Classic Movies tonight for the first time. It is an amazing, powerful, and moving film.
Unlike many of the reviews here, seeing this movie made in 1964 now, in 2009, is a very different experience. It is almost like watching science-fiction in reverse, as if you're watching a world that couldn't possibly be real because it is so twisted, cruel, and distorted. And yet it was, and in some ways, still is.
The movie is also jarring because it runs more like a documentary than a Hollywood movie. The acting by the main characters is superb, but the production itself is simple, and that, combined with some less experienced supporting actors combines to give the movie a raw feel that actually amplifies the intensity of the emotions portrayed because they come across as genuine instead of polished. And toward the end, I kept rooting for some salve of mercy or a more typical Hollywood ending, but what we get is ever so much more powerful.
And finally, the movie is jarring because it's the first credited screen appearance of Richard Mulligan in a role completely different from his later persona. That too, adds to the alternate universe feeling to this movie.
A truly wonderful film. Hopefully, it is being archived by the American Film Institute, or the Smithsonian, because it so accurately portrays a tormented period of American life. Historically, there was far more torment to come, but movies like this provided a spark that may someday truly lead to a world in which people respect each other as people, and not for an irrelevant characteristic, however relevant that characteristic may be socially.
Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa (2008)
Mediocrity Galore!
That this movie should rate more than a 5 is a disgrace. Really, people, get a grip! The first half hour of this movie is just plain annoying. As in I actually had my finger on the stop button and would have written the whole thing off, but the movie does improve after the animals get to Africa.
I was sorely disappointed in the penguins. The stole the first movie, but here they are just caricatures of themselves. If they go on to stardom on Nickelodeon I hope someone breathes the life back in them. The original spark that made them special is just lost to inane stupid antics here.
And sorry, Nana, but you must get the axe. Every time she appeared on screen, my fingers crawled to the stop button. Doesn't any comedic writer understand that a joke is a joke for only so long, and then it becomes a catastrophe? And finally, the PREACHINESS! Oy, gevalt! 15-20 years from now, our kids are going to derive endless humor in the relentless series of morals we throw at them in movies supposedly made for kids to enjoy. From father and son issues, to the triumph of inter-species love (not to mention animate to inanimate love!) and unions, and individuality...marrona mia, what's left...do your homework and don't drink and drive? Jeesh! Give me Tom and Jerry, the Road Runner, or Rocky and Bullwinkle, but can we PLEASE go back to giving kids enjoyment instead of Sunday School? I gave this movie 5 stars only because some of the voice over work was first class. A tip of the tail to Sacha Baron Cohen for King Julien, he was the only character worthy of being called 'animated.' The rest were about as lifeless and full of surprises as the Skipper's love object.
Burn After Reading (2008)
Tagline should be: Intelligence MISSING
One must always approach a Coen film like approaching a snake with stick, because you know in the end it will try to bite. Some people call it entertainment, I think it's just stupid.
As with all Coen entertainment, the word 'f---' is used more than common words such as 'the' and 'a'. And ALL of the major actors in the movie act like there's a surgeon in the dressing room who performs a lobotomy before they go in front of the camera. The Coens must hang out with some REALLY STUPID folks or people whose brains are totally fried out on drugs.
But it isn't the verbal profanity, it's the actual screwing with people that I find objectionable. All of their movies are depictions of a screw.
And while screwing is certainly an 'adult' entertainment, the entertainment value heavily depends on whether one is in the position of screwer or screwee. So, while all the screwers in the audience laugh their heads off at the antics on the screen, keep this in mind: what goes around comes around...the screwer will ultimately inevitably become the screwee, and then the joke is on you.
Tilda Swinton's character was the only one in the movie that was compelling, and she had the most unlikeable character of them all. Who am I to say? But I'll say it anyway, Brad Pitt IS TOO OLD to be playing roles like this. And a note to George Clooney, you'd do your career an enormous boost when the next time the Coens call, you tell them you're not available...or do you always want to play goofs? Everyone loves a young rake, but when you get older the same antics just come across as hopelessly lost. C'mon guys, you're both GREAT actors, you just need to devote your talents to better material!
So you may place me in the ranks of those who dislike Coen movies. I think part of their appeal is that they play out some adolescent fantasies under a veneer of reality. Except that actually, there's less reality in them than the Lord of the Rings.
The Day the Earth Stood Still (2008)
Movie will outlast bad reviews
My apologies if I release some SPOILERS not already mentioned, but I've already seen quite a few. But I just saw the movie and am grateful to have a place to share some thoughts. Come back after you've SEEN the movie, and this will make more sense anyway...
Let's get one thing out of the way...this movie is NOT Citizen Kane. But it isn't as bad as many of the reviewers are making it out to be, and really, if you compare the KIND of movie it was back in 1951 (grade B sci-fi flick...maybe even B-?) this compares rather well. The movie makes you think, but it really does NOT make you think in the way you think it does. Certainly NOT if you take it at face value. But it seems to me even the DIRECTOR didn't know the real gem that exists within this movie, although SOMEBODY did. I'd almost wager a kind of bet between the Director, Producer, and/or Screenwriter. Somebody lost, and it was definitely the movie! This movie is NOT necessarily about militarism, though the original was, and it would have done the movie credit if it had kept that element. It is ostensibly about conservation, but not really.
The true "message" of this movie is given by the Professor (John Cleese) and it's the one Keanu/Klaatu use to save the day. See the movie and that comment will make sense.
Now, here's the TRAGEDY of the screenplay. When Keanu and Jada Pinkett Smith are in the truck together, they talk about Jada now not wanting Keanu to get killed. I was waiting on the edge of my seat for Keanu to simply ask the boy "WHY?" and it would have been an INFINITELY better movie. That in itself would have explained the whole rest of Keanu's actions without the tawdry stupid melodramatic scene in the cemetery. Certainly any alien civilization that would know enough about Earth to know English, would have seen enough tawdry melodramatic scenes like this...enough to either roil their digestive juices of want to cauterize the planet anyways.
And one more note. If we act ANYWHERE NEAR as stupid as we do in this movie when visited by another civilization, Earth deserves to be blown to smithereens, no matter HOW melodramatic humanity may be or how many life supporting planets are left out there! Overall, I think this movie is well worth seeing, and will stand the test of time well...when all the reviews have been forgotten. The same fate as the original.
I Am Legend (2007)
No more Akiva Goldsman movies for me!
I love Will Smith and am a huge fan of special effects movies, but I will have my head examined by a psychotherapist before I EVER go to see another movie that Akiva Goldsman destroys.
From the insipid and misfactual A Beautiful Mind (which beat out Fellowship of the Ring no less as best movie!) to the banal Batman and Robin, through the destruction of I, Robot and the man who singlehandedly mauled The Davinci Code...the next time I go to see a movie I will make sure his name is not in the credits.
Sappy, moronic, maudlin pop-religiosity, all of his works are filled with a total disdain for the ability of his audience to understand the most basic of plot developments, his movies ROT! I have rarely been so offended watching a movie as when at the end of the Davinci Code, the hero kneels by the Louvre, and this was a close second with all the stupid dialogue from movies (mostly Shrek) just in case we, the audience, was too high on popcorn to understand what was occurring on the screen.
Why does this man still have a Hollywood career?
The Fairly OddParents (2001)
Odd parents indeed!
I came home from work the other night exhausted and began channel surfing and woke up an hour or so later to some screechy voices on TV. A boy fairy was having a baby, the girl fairy looked like a boy with long eye lashes and a cartoon Governor Arnold was waving a wand and running to the toilet. What's up doc? I wasn't sure if I was still in a dream or a nightmare, but I had to finish watching the rest of the show. After a few minutes, the voices grew on me, and have to say I find them rather appealing. It didn't take much to figure out what was going on, but have to admit it was all handled much more elegantly and maturely than most "adult-type" toons out there. Goofy yes, odd oh yes, and very funny, but not in a stupid way that's so common.
Saw today the channel-surfing show where Timmy and Vicki duel it out with fairy remotes on a whirlwind tour of toons past and present. Absolutely brilliant! It had me laughing at a toon in way I haven't in a long time. Bravo for capturing the spirit of so many toons! A must-see for anyone who grew up on these things.
What strikes me about this tune is its maturity. Not mature acting kids, that's the norm out there. What's mature about the show is the sensibility. Little Timmy doesn't isn't a shrunken grownup, but his decisions and reactions to events can teach kids what's right and important better than sticky sweetness or hours of preaching.
There are loads of jokes for adults in the shows I've watched, and it's become (somebody hide Spongebob's eyes!) my favorite Nick show.
Shrek the Third (2007)
Whatta Turkey!
Gee, just in time for Thanksgiving, they release Shrek III. And what a coincidence, it's turkey time! There's a lot of bad films out there these days, and unfortunately Shrek III is one of them. The animation, as always, was good otherwise I would have rated it a 1, but everything else about this movie tanked.
What were the creative minds thinking, or did they? I swear they got their plot devices from a field trip to Cal State Northridge. Only the students there would have been able to come up with something infinitely more clever.
All the "prithee" talk might have worked if it wasn't jarringly juxtaposed with "valley girlspeak", which on the whole left me like totally disconnected with the movie.
The studio ought to donate the proceeds to charity. They certainly didn't earn them!
O Brother, Where Art Thou? (2000)
What a piece of trash!
I am about as UN-southern as they come. Boston bred and LA raisin', the only connection I have to the south is when they call LA the Southland. Be that as it may, I had the misfortune to watch this movie tonight.
People write about the Coen brothers "doing their thing," what is that stupidity? Inanity? Oh, excuse me, inanity is considered the new sophistication! Well, lordy, lordy, lordy, lordy! George Clooney was passable, and does John Turturo demand a lobotomy before he signs a contract? He sure acted it in this film! That's TWO movies I've seen in the past few weeks (this and Transformers) in which Turturo better watch out for Christmas, because he's one heck of a hammer! I guess subtlety is a thing of the past. The whole intent of this movie seems to throw as many Southern stereotypes at the wall and see what sticks. Well, you know what? People selling trash in the guise of art are a thousand times hickier than anything portrayed in this movie.
Think I didn't get the joke? Well, the joke is on you for thinking this pile of doo-doo is worth crap.
Stardust (2007)
Perfect Summer Movie!
I just got back from the theatre, so perhaps there's a bit too much stardust in my eyes but this is exactly what you always hope for in summer -- a great escape. The movie is engrossing from the start, and the acting is superb. Claire Danes is great, but she's not the only star in this film, Charlie Cox and Michelle Pfeiffer also shine, and wait till you see Robert DeNiro doing the can-can! Perhaps a bit over the top, but adds another layer of poignancy to the message of the movie which is a testament to love and self-integrity.
There's magic galore, the film is filled with visual and aural delights, but it isn't just the magical effects on the screen that carries the magic of the movie, but the adult sensibilities of the plot, narrative and characterization.
A perfect film for the summer!
Adrenaline Rush: The Science of Risk (2002)
Well Worth Seeing!
Spoilers ahead: I saw this recently at the Air and Space Museum at the Smithsonian in DC with a couple of business buddies. At first, I have to admit to mild acrophobia and being some skeptical of the title, but the boss was buying and I couldn't weazel out. When the movie began, I could barely look directly at the screen, as free-falling to the ground from a plane isn't exactly an experience I relish. However,as the movie progressed and began to explore the biology behind the excitement of these daring (crazy?) feats, I was slowly conquering my queezy stomach. By the time they tested Leonardo Da Vinci's parachute over the Mohave, and I watched it majestically soar over the desert, I was enthralled. At the finale, when it was time for the jump from the mountain I promised myself to follow it all the way through, and landed a changed man. Great experience, well worth seeing!
Ugly Betty (2006)
Viva la Betty!
After all the accolades at the Golden Globes, I thought I'd give this show a try, and I have to say I'm smitten by Betty!
While some of the less central characters are a bit over the top, and some of the situations are a bit formulaic, the core of the show is all heart. It's like Telemundo meets Dynasty.
It's SO refreshing to see real life issues portrayed in a way that is both relevant and heart-warming. It's been a long time since I've cared about a TV show, but I'll be watching Betty every week, and catching up on those I missed!
The storyline for the new season seems to be navigating waters American public TV hasn't gone before, but so far it seems to be doing so in a way that is both interesting and thought provoking. Not to mention just plain funny!
Betty la fea esta la bella nueva!! Go Betty, Go America!
Happy Feet (2006)
Let your feet take you to this movie!
OK, so it's not Citizen Kane, but after suffering through this year's supposed cream of the crop, you won't go wrong here in the entertainment department, and isn't that what movies are REALLY supposed to be about? It's not always a film about dancing pengiuns (d'oh!) and it might be too sophisticated for a 4 yr old (chronological or developmental age) but the animation is superb, the screenplay well written, and the Latino penguins are the best team up since the Marx brothers! There are lots of comments on this board about a "liberal" agenda to this movie. Well, if you think global warming is nonsense, that we're not overfishing our seas, and that stupid human beings haven't tried to squelch anything new or different, then you're bound to be offended, but you're apt to be offended by real life, too!
I thought Noah's fulmugations on Mumble's dancing a particularly apt send-up to Elvis (Memphis, Mumble's dad) since it so poetically reflects the hellfire and brimstone thrown at the real Elvis and his followers by Christian Southern Baptists in the '60s.
Anyway, politics and messages aside, you'll not find a movie this season so uplifting, affirming, and entertaining as this. You'll be glad you did!
The Black Dahlia (2006)
Not bad, no Citizen Kane...
I'd really like to give this movie more, it really tries so darn HARD to BE more, but I...just...can't...
By the time you get to this review, you'll probably have read a lot about the movie already, so enough about the noir and comparisons to LA Confidential! You shouldn't need a degree in Cinema to enjoy a movie.
I liked the acting, and I liked all the delightfully quirky characters. That's part of a what a movie should be about, and it's worth seeing just for that, and the somewhat overdone denouement.
My first complaint with this film is that I hate it when the producer tints, desaturates or otherwise molests the film itself to create a look. Doesn't anyone else hate the artificiality of it??? A movie ABOUT the 40's doesn't have to look like it was FILMED in the 40's to be authentic. Beautiful actors and actresses whose beauty is hidden behind an overzealous love affair with Photoshop. If you want mood, take some lithium and go stare at a Salvator Dali painting.
The other complaint is similar to the first. I found it difficult to get into the movie because everyone seemed so 40's campy in the beginning. Scarlett Johanssen is a marvelous actress but she wiggled her bosom so much in the first 45 minutes I thought Brian stuffed a mouse in her bra. Once she lost the mouse, she was great. Confused, perhaps, but she was supposed to have torn loyalties and that came through clear. And by the way, if any one has some extra lithium, maybe you should toss some Aaron's way.
Hilary was great, is she ever not? Fiona is a scene-stealer for sure, and Josh did a yeoman's job keeping everything together. Kudoos, buddy! So my advice to Brian is next time you get the chance, play it straight man and you'd have done so much better! And my advice to anyone who goes to see it...like any mystery movie, pay attention!! EthanQ
King Kong (2005)
Enjoy the Movie, Leave your Brain at home
Sorry, but I can't say what's on my mind without spoilers and if I don't write something about it, these thoughts will just bang around in my head until I take an aspirin.
The main reason I went to see the movie was in respect of Peter Jackson's work. To have so lovingly crafted the LOTR movies the way he did, shows an enormous ability to produce gorgeous, masterful films.
First off, King Kong is WORTH SEEING, particularly in a movie theater. The better the theater, the better your viewing experience. I just saw it at the Cinerama Dome, and it was an awesome experience! But to truly enjoy this movie, you've got to suspend all rational thought processes and let Jackson take you wherever it is he has in mind. The Pamplona scene with the characters running with the dinos was the most unrealistic thing I think I've ever seen in the movies. You might as well show people having a tea party in outer space. Jack getting de-Raided with a machine gun takes second prize in the same category. And when Jack is sitting in a theater and suddenly gets the notion to get his gal back, HE'S SITTING THERE WATCHING HIS OWN PLAY! What's he do, get amnesia on the island? The movie IS a gorgeous piece of work. The detail of 1930's New York, the Island, and Kong himself are beautifully done. In spite of the fact that sometimes I couldn't believe the corniness of some of the dialog the acting itself by Naomi Watts, Jack Black, and Adrian Brody and Thomas Kreschmann was great. And for my part, the scene with the dinosaurs fighting Kong and Kong on the Empire State building were worth the price of admission...which was pretty expensive! Like the title says, enjoy the movie...but leave your brain at home!