Movie of the Day - July

July 1st, 2012 - "Private Parts" isn't a bad movie...per say...but honestly, Im not even quite sure why the movie was even made. I'm not a Howard Stern fan, but at the same time, I've never been one of those right-wing Anti-Stern players either. In my mind, he's a shock jock, and I have no interest listening to a shock jock, so I don't...but did a movie, based on his autobiography, really need to get made? I don't think so. In the movie, we see the life story of Howard (played by himself) from kid, to college nerd, to low-rent disc jockey, to "King of All Media". The linear story itself is a little off as well. We start at the present, start with the beginning of Stern's childhood, reach the mid-80s....and that's it. There is an entire decade that is completely not touched upon, making it seem that the film was almost desperate to have a happy ending that it cuts the story in the middle. The acting is a mixed bag, either brilliant or so-so. Howard Stern is no actor, so seeing him go through the scenes makes one wonder why Jeff Goldblum wasn't brought in to play the lead role. Mary McCormack is okay, but her role as Allison Stern doesn't really stand out too well in my mind. The one real highlight is Paul Giamotte as Stern's nemesis for the film, "Pigvomit". Once again, Giamotte proves why he is an excellent jack-of-all-trades actor, playing an NBC exec who will shake your hand while stabbing you in the back at the same time...though that does lead me to my biggest complaint about the movie. Even though it is a biography of Stern's life, it is WAY too cut from Stern's POV. People he likes are praised. People he doesn't like are villainized. The film is so Pro-Stern that it almost makes the man too sugary sweet, and in the process, off putting. Not to mention that the cameos from Stern's studio friends is simply down right uncomfortable, dragging the how down to a screeching hault. Howard Stern fans are going to love the film, plain and simple, but like I said, I just don't see why this story needed to be made into a movie. For what it is, it's fine, but if it would have told a whole story and had a bit more of an even-balanced story of the man behind the mic, it could have been much better. I give "Private Parts" 2 1/2 out of 5 stars.

July 2nd, 2012 - This movie is, without a doubt, the best theatrical musical in at least the last 20 years....and it's funnier then hell. Based on the legendary television show, "South Part: Bigger Longer and Uncut" took what made the show excellent and expanded upon it, making it into an excellent tale of war, love, family, curse words, and the never ending search for the clitorus. What could have simply have been 2 hours of 8 year olds cursing, the movie tells a much bigger, and frankly brilliant, tale about a war between America and Canada, how PC the world has become, the extremes that would be taken for something as simple as swearing, and even the rise of Satan, and how even the ideals of evil itself could often be misunderstood. The story is excellent, the visual effects are the best in the history of the series, the voice talent is sensational with guest talent like George Clooney, Brett Spiner, Dave Foley, Eric Idle, and of course, the late, great Isaac Hayes. The negatives about the movie are few, but need to be pointed out. While the overuse of violence and adult material are used as a means of social commentary, it can, into itself, become a little much. Did we really need to see Sadaam Hussein whip out fake 'apendages'? I don't think so. Still, this movie proved that a low brow, shock value series made from construction paper could be a true work of art, and raised the stakes for all animated films, musicals, and comedies in general to live up to. I give "South Park: Bigger Longer and Uncut" 4 1/2 out of 5 stars.

July 3rd, 2012 - Holy Crap! Milla Jovovich in a good movie! Call the neighbors! While not exactly box office gold during its original release, "The Fifth Element" has quickly become a cult classic, and its quite easy to see why. Taking a unique storyline about the very elements themselves, throwing in the technical aspect of the world of tomorrow, and finally including some popcorn, cheeseball fun, this is one of those movies that has a little bit of everything to make a pretty decent film. Bruce Willis summons his best 'John McClain of the Future' to give us a rough but loveable taxi driving hero that makes it pretty easy to invest in as he needs to keep Leeloo (Milla Jovovich) safe, as well as locating the mysterious Fifth Element. The visual effects are stunning, and the story (while at times needlessly complicated) is fun, there are two things about this movie that do put me off: 1.) as much as I respect the actor, Gary Oldman as the main villain does nothing for me. Other then visually appearing as a cartoon character, he doesn't really stand out in my mind, nor is he all that memerable. His character might has well been named 'Generic badguy number twelve'. My other, main problem...and this should come as a surprise to no one....Chris friggin' Tucker! The actor is annoying! His character is annoying! Every scene he is in is annoying! He was put into this movie simple to annoy....AND ITS ANNOYING! The entire scheme of the movie changes the second he is put on screen, and it sure as hell isn't for the better! Hell, I dare you to watch the movie and notice the look on Bruce Willis' face everytime they share a scene. You can tell that even in 1997 he thought he was 'Too old for this ****'. But still, the movie is alot of fun, a good performance by most of the cast (I really do like Milla Jovovich in this role, as much as I tend to mock her in MOTD) and think its a fun, laid back flick for anyone just looking for a cool, shoot-em-up, sci-fi flick. I give "The Fifth Element" 3 1/2 out of 5 stars.

July 4th, 2012 - Well folks, it finally happened...186 movies into this little project, and I finally did it...I watched, what could very well have been, the absolute WORST MOVIE EVER MADE! But...what about this movie is so bad? What makes it worse then "Hellraiser: Revelations" or "Superman IV: The Quest for Peace"? Well, to answer that, we need to look at the original "Weekend at Bernies" While far from a cinema masterpiece, at least the movie had a simple premise with an understandable theme: a billionaire CEO dies during a weekend meeting with his two employees that must now pretend that he is still alive in an attempt to gain a fortune. It's stupid, it's silly, but its relatively harmless. So, the question is...how the hell do you make a sequel to a concept like THAT? The answer, dead reader, is the thing that bothers me the most about this movie....THEY USE MAGIC! THEY USE A VOODOO SPELL TO 'BRING BERNIE BACK TO LIFE' because he is a 'chosen one' and will lead whoever summons him to riches.....YOU CAN'T JUST PULL MAGIC OUT OF YOUR ASS FOR THE SAKE OF PLOT CONVIENCE! Yes, the first movie was stupid, but at least it set rules for itself. While cartoony, at least the first movie had a basis in reality, but this movie? Screw reality! We need to do the same joke to death (pardon the pun) to create some of the most unfunny jokes known to man...and ooooooh is this movie unfunny. I didn't crack a smile ONCE during this entire trainwreck. The two leads (who are frankly so bad, I didn't even boter to learn their names) are so unlikeable and unfunny that I began to tune out whenever they were onscreen...which considering that they are the leads is ALOT OF *beep* TUNING OUT! I swear, people, I have never been so bored, annoyed, and pissed off all at the same time after watching a movie. This movie is the worst of the worst. It makes "Good Burger" look like friggin' "Citizen Kane". There is no appeal, no good acting, no good effects, and frankly, no reason to see this movie at all! I can openly say that "Weekend at Bernie's II" is the WORST movie I've seen for Movie of the Day, and could very well have been the WORST movie I've ever seen....what a crappy way to spend the Fourth of July! For the first time ever, I give "Weekend at Bernie's II"....ZERO out of 5 stars...oh yeah....ZERO! It's that friggin' bad!!!

July 5th, 2012 - One of the first few direct to video Batman films before the 'Warner Premiere' distributions, "Batman: Mystery of the Batwoman" is a pretty okay film, but it suffers the same problems that some of the later "Star Trek" films had, be it that its not so much a movie as it is an extended episode. With animation taken directly from the KidsWB era Batman cartoon, its really nothing to right home about, with nothing new or too exciting, especially frustrating considering that "Justice League" was already on the air for two years after this movie was released. The story is good, focusing on more of a detective style mystery rather then a simple 'throw-em-down' type of action cartoon, but at the same time, for a story about muder, gang warfare, and false imprisonment, its extremely kid friendly, even by Batman animated standards. The voice acting is decent, with obvious exceptions like the always awesome as hell Kevin Conroy, Tara Strong, Bob Hastings, and Efrem Zimbalist Jr, but Im not sure how I feel about the 'guest voices'. Kimberly Brooks as Kathy Duquense, Bruce's love interest for the story, is okay but forgettable, not really making the character anything over then the rich, spoiled brat her character was supposed to break out of (Brooks does a MUCH better role voicing Oracle in the Arkham Asylum video games). Elisa Gabrielli as Detective Sonia Alcana is okay, but its clear that the character and the voice as a whole was to be a take off of Renee Montoya, making you miss the character all the more. And then...there is Kelly Ripa as Roxanne "Rocky" Ballantine...Im sure Kelly Ripa is a very nice, talented woman, but she was horribly miscasted in this role. She plays the spunky and sweet part of the character alright, but her grim and gritty emotions towards the role are pretty much lost, making everything (event the darker storylines) seem more candy coated. Kelly Ripa, in my opinion, was one of the first real experimental choices for casting more well known actors and actresses in roles (something that would be all too common in DC's recent DTV films), but I feel like they struck out with Ripa. One voice that does, however, deserve all the credit in the world is Kyra Sedgwick as the voice of the title character, Batwoman. She does get the grim and grittiness of the character, as well as the playful charm that should be delievered. She brings the Batwoman character to the same league as Conroy's Batman, and makes the mystery of the character all the better. For Batman purists, this will be an enjoyable film, standing out as almost a 'lost episode' of the TV series, but with the forementioned recent string of darker, more edgy DCU films, it somewhat falls flat. Still, its not horrible, or even bad. It's a certain mixed bag, but makes for a pretty interesting Batman film. I give "Batman: Mystery of the Batwoman" 3 out of 5 stars.

July 6th, 2012 - Weeks ago, I reviewed the entire Spider-Man trilogy back to back, stating that together, the entire movie is relatively average, due to odd casting, unexpected sight gags, and relatively goofy moments. "The Amazing Spider-Man" is exactly what a Spider-Man movie should have been, and stands out as the best of the entire franchise. Is the movie dark? Yeah, a little, a few moments here and there, but this movie does offer plenty of lighthearted moments too. Let's start with the film's best drawing power: the cast. The cast of this movie is flawless! Andrew Garfield is the new benchmark for Spider-Man capturing what Peter Parker should be: geek chic, brilliant, but always with a touch of awkwardness to him. Seeing the story take on Spider-Man as a teenager is a breath of fresh air, not seeing that he simply 'put on tights and saved the day', but he actually had to grow through his powers, learning them, and having to become a hero by trial and error. Emma Stone as Gwen Stacy was everything I wanted in Mary Jane from the original series and so much more. Not only does she serve as Peter's love interest, but she is one of the best female role models in a superhero movie in years. When Spider-Man and the Lizard are fighting in Peter's highschool, Gwen tries to help better! When Gwen comes face to face with the Lizard, she holds a can of pepper spray up to him, ready to fight! When Peter tells her to hide during the final battle, Gwen creates an anti-toxin to fight back the Lizard's chemical compound that would have turned New York into Lizard monsters themselves. Gwen was anything but a damsel in distress, and she was fantastic in it. Dennis Leary as George Stacy and Martin Sheen as Uncle Ben also delievered excellent performances, both standing out as excellent role models for Pete. While the 'Power and Responsibilty' line is never stated, it doesn't have to be, as both men's performances show the message more then it had to be stated. My only issues with the cast are Rhys Ifans as Curt Conners, who at time was a little too 'stereotyical mad scientist' for my taste, and Sally Field as Aunt May...simply because I feel like Field was EXTREMELY underused in the film. Other then those tiny issues, everything else about the movie was excellent. The story was solid, the action was beautiful, and the ending was satisfying without being as preachy as the original triology. While 'Spider-Man 2' could still be argued to be the best comic book movie ever made (and still has its place on my Top Ten Favorite Movies of all Time), "The Amazing Spider-Man" took what I wanted from the character and made him truly excellent. I give "The Amazing Spider-Man" 4 out of 5 stars.

July 7th, 2012 - The thing that bothers me about this movie is that it pretty much stands as the exact opposite of what I've been preaching for years: if a franchise makes a film that is accurate to it's original medium, it should be good! "Conan the Barbarian" is close to its original source material from author Robert E. Howard, but so much of it is simply...unpleasant. The acting is wooden, which hurts due to the use of actors like Ron Perlman, Stephan Lang, Rose McGowen, and even Morgan Freeman narrating, but James Momoa as the role of Conan probabily commits the worse crime in the movie. No, his acting isn't bad...it's simply forgettable. For you to play the role of a blood thirsty Barbarian, and to be forgettable, you have to be doing something wrong. The big thing going for this movie were its 3D and CGI effects, but frankly, nothing about the film stood out in my mind visually either. As beautiful as the effects may be, they are simply hard to enjoy, do to the fact that most of them seem either out of place or unnecessary, pretty much using effects for the sake of having effects. Now, one thing that I do need to give props to this movie for is the beginning. The first half hour of this movie is dedicated to Conan as a child, and if the entire movie would have focused on that aspect alone, it would have been pretty damn good. Leo Howard (who we will heard from again in my GIJoe: The Rise of Cobra review) did an excellent job as the young Barbarian, capturing more emotion and power in his role then anyone else in the cast. I would have rather have seen "Conan: The Young Years" over this movie any day of the week, and I wish Leo nothing but a long, well established career. All in all, this movie comes off as nothing more then a waste of time. It's long, its boring, and it makes me wish half the effort that went into visuals went into story and acting. I give "Conan the Barbarian" 2 out of 5 stars.

July 8th, 2012 - When I was a kid, "The Rocky and Bullwinkle" show was one of my favorite cartoons. Not only did I think the animation was playfully, the jokes were actually funny in a corny sorta way, and it was a cartoon that even my parents watched growing up, so it's a show that was rather timeless....and then Hollywood had to get their grubby little hands on the franchise, and thus, this piece of crap was born. Now, if this was a simple little direct to video movie about the two, I could have given it a pass, but this movie was made for one reason, and one reason only....ROBERT DE NIRO WANTED TO PLAY FEARLESS LEADER!!!! Don't believe me? Think 'Bobby' was just roped into a bad movie? Guess what...HE PRODUCED THE THING TOO! It would be like wanting to make a Powerpuff Girls cartoon because someone said "Damn, if you squint your eyes, Ben Stiller could kinda, sorta look like Mojo Jojo!" De Niro's role is also extremely phoned in. Yes, I know its Rocky and Bullwinkle, but at least a little bit of care could have been put into the acting. Jason Alexander and Rene Russo play the legendary Boris and Natasha, and...they really don't do too badly. In the film, they seem to be the only ones actually trying, and taking the source material seriously. Piper Perabo, the film's lead, plays the character of FBI agent Karen Symathy (...ha...ha...ha) as she is in charge of leading Rocky and Bullwinkle to stop the villains before they take over people's minds via television, and thus, take over the world. Perabo's performance is...bland. She's not horrible, but she's really not that memorable either. In her defense, at the same time, I think the only real funny moments of the film are when she breaks the fourth wall, simply due to how there is a likeability about her, and it is fun to feel like you are a part of the road comedy too. The animation for Rocky and Bullwinkle looks...well...you know how sometimes, you got to an amusement park, and the rides have those little mini-clips of a famous cartoon character to get you excited for the ride, but the animation looks crappy, the lines never sync up to the lips, and it honestly looks like it was made over a weekend? That's what this art style looks like. Nothing exciting, and frankly kinda boring. The film is also littered with celebrity cameos, ranging from Billy Crystal to David Allen Grier to John Goodman to....Kenan and Kel for whatever reason, and really, all these cameos do is make me want to watch the actual movies these people star in ("Red State" and "Good Burger" not included). Maybe it's my more adult oriented synical side, but as much as Rocky and Bullwinkle is timeless and enjoyable, this movie has far too much of a kid's perspective. Younger kids will no doubt enjoy it, but it's most certainly not geared to the older crowd, no matter how much it tries to be hip. I give "The Adventures of Rocky and Bullwinkle" 1 1/2 out of 5 stars.

July 9th, 2012 - Two quick fun facts about me: I am a hardcore wrestling fan, and I am a modest Christian. So when I was dragged (keyword: dragged) to a Christian bookstore, I was happily surprised to come across a DVD dedicated to one of my favorite wrestlers of all time, Steve Borden, aka, Sting. A former WCW, TNA, and NWA World Heavyweight Champion, Sting had an excellent character based upon that of the film "The Crow" and still to this day, reinvents himself time and time again. This film "Sting: Moment of Truth" stands as an autobiographic look at his life, as well as telling the story of how he turned his life from that of sinning as a means to overcome the physical and mental pains of the ring to a life of God, as well as serving Jesus Christ. Im not one to argue religious aspects towards anyone's life (as long as you are living a clean, happy life, whatever the reasons may be, that's what's important) but this film is...weird. For consisting entirely of unknowns under a B-Movie budget, the acting is rather nice and crisp, most people taking their source material to heart, and giving good performances. Steve Borden, himself, is no actor, but considering that it is his life story, the performance could have been alot worse. It's sorta the opposite effect of the way I felt about Howard Stern in the "Private Parts" review. While a different actor does play Sting as a younger man, if ANYONE would have worn the black and while makeup other then Steve Borden himself, it would have simply felt wrong. My main complaint about the movie is that it isn't sure what it wants to be. 50% of the film is a straight on docu-drama about the life of the man behind the makeup with the occasional wrestling match tossed in (the coolest part is seeing wrestlers like Abyss, Chris Harris, and Lance Hoyt making cameos), but the other 50% is...damn weird. Suddenly, they would show scenes of Sting walking through a dark hallway, sinners offering him drugs, alcohol, and loose women, until only by asking for guidance from the heavenly father can he escape...or something like that. It's like really back music videos from the mid-90s. Speaking of music, the music in this film is HORRIBLE! I've never been into Christian Rock, but the entire film is either that or bland stock music. We get the smallest bit of 'Seek and Destroy' thrown in with old Sting footage from his WCW run, but its simply too little. It's not the worst film ever made, and could actually help inspire those who also wish to use religion in their everyday life, but if this would have been more documentary then drama, it would have been much better as well. I give "Sting: Moment of Truth" 2 out of 5 stars.

July 10th, 2012 - As a hardcore fan of the cult classic "Aeon Flux" television show, I want to hate this movie more then anything in the world....but I can't. I don't like it, but it's not the god-aweful piece of crap I wanted it to be. Peter Chung, creator of Aeon Flux, was able to capture why this movie makes me so angry in one simple sentence: "Miss Flux does NOT make an appearance in this movie". In all due respect to Charlize Theron (who, honestly, would have been my pick to play Aeon in a live action movie), she is NOTHING like the character from the cartoon. No sexual fetishes. No account for human error. No personal willingness to give anything (and betray anyone) for the mission. All she and the character have are the same name, and loosely, the same hair style. The plot of the movie features Aeon attempting to kill government leader Trevor Goodchild (played by Marton Csokas; also NOTHING like the character from the cartoon) after it's revealed that the government is responsible for a string of disappearances. However, when Goodchild reveals that he has information about Aeon's previous life (...if this is supposed to be a take on Aeon dying in the original string of cartoons, job horribly done!), she must now keep him alive to get answers. As you can tell, the movie follows practically nothing from the cartoon, so for purists like me, it's certainly disappointing...however, if you take the Aeon Flux aspect for the movie out...it actually makes a relatively tolerant flick. The effects are smooth, the acting is pretty par, and the plot does take an interesting take on futuristic events. If this movie would have been called anyting else and not have taken and shaped two childhood characters of fine and turn them into whatever the hell the writer wanted them to be for plot convience, then this film would have gotten a much hire rating....but if I put an Aeon Flux movie in my DVD player, I EXPECT TO SEE A DAMN AEON FLUX MOVIE! I give "Aeon Flux" 2 1/2 out of 5 stars.

July 11th, 2012 - It takes a hell of alot of talent to make a movie in which a character can savagely rape and beat individuals, and yet, you still find yourself rooting for the character in the end. "A Clockwork Orange" is an absolute masterpiece of cinema, showing how there is something of a twisted artform to savagery, and shows just how far darkness and evil can claw into the heart of mankind. Malcolm McDowell plays Alex, a teenager who leads a group of his peers in acts of "ultra-violence" across the town. Soon, Alex is caught by the police and is involved in an experiment in which sights and sounds of either sex or violence causes him to become ill. Because of this and his shady past, Alex depends on the kindness of strangers...only to find those he hurt in the past hurting him even more violently, slowly beginning his path to 'retribution', and slowly recreating the monster he once was. McDowell's performance is breathtaking, able to be the monster and the victim in the same breath, as well as creating a classiness to the character, making it hard not to like him...while he is raping, beating, and torturing people. Director Stanley Kubrick uses sights, sounds, and visuals to create the world around Alex, in the process, making that world just as dark and disturbing as he is. Every bit of the movie had so much care and focus put into it, not a single frame going to waste. Frankly, if you can take an easy going/loveable song as "Singin' in the Rain" and making it an anthem for violence, you have to either be a genius or out of your mind. Luckily for us, this movie is a little bit of both, and ends up creating one of the most artistically brilliant movies ever made. I give "A Clockwork Orange" 4 1/2 out of 5 stars.

July 12th, 2012 - Based on (almost scene for scene) on the Spanish movie "[REC]", "Quarantine" is a found footage film while follows a news reporter (played by Jennifer Carpenter) and her camera man as they follow city firefighters as they respond to an incident that occurs inside a local apartment complex. Once inside, the crew and apartment tenants find themselves quarantined inside the building, as the tenants slowly begin to die, then rise as infect zombies, turning on eachother. As far as found footage goes, this is one of the better films, actually using the camera itself as a prop for some of the action scenes, with excellent moments of chills and spills that makes for quite an entertaining horror experience. Jennifer Carpenter in the lead is good, but I will admit, she's not really the best when it comes to playing the damsel in distress/screaming type. Look at her role as Debra Morgan from "Dexter" or even her role from "Battle in Seattle". She's a confident, strong willed woman, so while its nice to see her acting against her normal typecasting, Im not sure if 'horror victim' suits her well (not counting "The Exorcism of Emily Rose"). The other cast members including Jay Hernandez, Columbus Short, and Dania Ramirez are all okay, but the characters fall under the point of stereotypical, so it's kinda obvious to guess who is going to die and how, making the moments of actual suspense, sadly, underwhelming in parts. For a found-footage remake, I have to admit, I liked this movie alot more then I thought I would. The bad parts are far in between, and the ending reveal as to how the infection started is both 'blink and you missed it' as well as confusing with the final shot of the movie....but luckily, [REC2] can actuall be used as a sequel to this movie, so it's not that bad. I give "Quarantine" 3 out of 5 stars.

July 13th, 2012 - This generation's "It's a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World", this mad cap, traveling movie is one of the funniest movies of the last 15 years, and its actually quite sad how not that many people even know its exists. The film is simple: a Las Vegas casino owner tells 8 people that there is a locker in Silver City, New Mexico that contains 2 million dollars, and the first person who gets to it keeps the money. From there, its a series of some of the funniest, spontanious, unexpected moments ever captured on film. A bus with I Love Lucy fans. Hitler's car being stolen. A taxi driver raging out due to being out of money due to a bad football call. Monster trucks. Angry ex-girlfriend pilots. Each moment funnier then the last. The absolute best thing about this movie is the cast. John Clease, Whoopi Goldberg, Cuba Gooding Jr, Seth Green, Rowen Atkinson, Amy Smart, and Jon Lovitz is just a handful of the talent behind this movie, and just like 'Its a Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad World', there are a large number of cameo apperances, but I wouldn't dare ruin them for you. Now, I do have one MAJOR beef with this movie. Drawing back to the 'Mad World' flick again, in my review, I claimed that the ending was sorta overly depressing, endin with the cast arrested and recovering from injuries. In "Rat Race", the ending is too damn happy, ending with the entire cast randomly hanging out with Smash Mouth (yeah, THAT Smash Mouth! They even sing "All Star"!) You can't have these people give into greed and turn on eachother like animals and wrap it all up so neat and clean. But still, its a damn funny movie, and an absolute trip from beginning to end. I give "Rat Race" 3 1/2 out of 5 stars.

July 14th, 2012 - This is one of the all time greatest comedies that simply has everything needed to create what could very well be the perfect movie. A at-the-top-of-his-game Chevy Chase as your star. A script by John Hughes. The directing talents of Harold 'Egon' Ramis. An all star list for co-stars including Beverly D'Angelo, John Candy, Randy Quaid, Eugene Levy, Anthony Michael Hall, and many more. Basically, "Vacation" is a winner across the board. For those of you who have not seen the film, its about the Chicago based family, The Griswolds, traveling cross country via a POS car to California so that they can go to their favorite amusement park, Wally World. While not my favorite of the franchise (that would be "Christmas Vacation", but we'll get to that during the holiday season), I think what works best about this movie is that its a relatively relatable concept on two different fronts. First, we've pretty much all have been in that situation on being in a family car trip, knowing the increasing hell caused by it the longer we are trapped together in such a confined space that we can relate what the Griswold family is going through. Also, I think we all have had those times in our lives where we have nothing but good intentions, but when things simply don't work out, we end up snapping, and becoming something we have never seen in ourselves, again being something we can all relate to. Chevy Chase as Clark W. Griswold is a timeless character, standing as one of the best movie Dads of all time. However, the character isn't perfect. He is dealt with a serious Charlie Brown syndrome in which he is knocked down time and time again, as well as having to fight temptation, be it a hot blonde catching his eye (leading him to almost cheat on his wife), to an open register filled with cash opening right in front of him. He's a flawed man, but well meaning, and is simply just so damn likeable. The film does have its fair share of moments that are, simply put, dark as hell. The sequence in which Clark leads to the death of his Aunt Edna's dog is out of the blue and brings the movie to a screeching halt, coming off as depressing. Also, there is a VERY un-PC scene where the Griswolds get lost in an 'urban neighborhood', getting their hubcaps stolen and racist comments sprayed on their car for their trouble. It feels like its from a totally different movie and is pretty much in bad taste. Still, the good of this movie totally outweighs the bad, and then some. Its a timeless comedy, and could be one of the best comedies ever made. I give "Vacation" 3 1/2 out of 5 stars.

July 15th, 2012 -Most people who know me know that I am NOT a gamer, but I did happen to get a Playstation right around the time 'Final Fantasy VII' came out. I thought it was okay, but it didn't really leave a long lasting impression on me (I would eventually come to respect the Final Fantasy characters alot more through my favorite game of all time, "Kingdom Hearts II"). Sadly, if you don't know alot about the original game of FFVII, when it comes to this movie, you are screwed. Something of a sequel to the game, this movie follows the further adventures of Cloud and friends as he ends having to deal with a virus being released amongst his home town, as well as events that could very well lead to the return of his greatest enemy, Sephiroth. Casual fans of the game could enjoy bits and pieces here and there, but you need to be a serious fan to understand the, seemingly, needlessly complicated plot. Also, since this is a Japan released CGI film, it is dubbed, and the voices are simply...okay. Not good, but I've heard alot more. However, the true art of this movie is, without a doubt, the visuals. The animation is stunning, with life-like CGI that takes the viewer into a world all its own, gorgeous from beginning to end. All in all, its a pretty decent movie with excellent animation, but if you know nothing about the FFVII world, I would advise staying clear. I give "Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children" 2 1/2 out of 5 stars.

July 16th, 2012 - This is one of those movies where....*sigh*...I want to give films that at least try to put effort in a positive review, but this movie is just a little too much razzle dazzle, and not enough detail into its basic script. Don't get me wrong, when this movie is good, it is excellent. While I will still defend to my dying breath that "Ben10" is a TOTAL rip off of DC Comic's "Dial H for Hero", the story of a boy who can become a selection of 10 different heroes is a good idea, and as far as a cartoon to live action transformation goes, visually, its excellent. Graham Phillips plays the role of Ben, and does a pretty good job. He's likeable, yet cocky, yet willing to do what is right, just like the character her plays, and was a rare good child actor. The same can be said for Haley Ramm, playing the role of Gwen. Also, the film does have a nice, detailed, dark (in a lighthearted sorta way) aspect that is essential to a good superhero movie, and the visual effects are excellent, making the alien transformations realistic, while still keeping its cartoon look in tact...though, the film sadly has many MANY problems. Lee Majors also stars in this movie as Grandpa Max, and he looks bored silly, taking away most of the credibility Max had in the cartoon. Also, the script absolutely SUCKS. When you make a live action film based on a cartoon property, you take your characters to the limits, to places they have never gone before. This movie, however, suffers from the same problem most "Star Trek: The Next Generation" films had, in which its nothing more then an extended, bad episode. This movie and its 'race against time' concept is confusing, and leads to a pretty shabby climax that seemed really crunched. Fans of the show may enjoy it, and kids who are a tad bit too young for the "X-Men" film franchise may enjoy it, but this movie simply wasn't for me. I give "Ben 10: Race Against Time" 2 out of 5 stars.

July 17th, 2012 - Let me rip the band-aid off quickly and simply say: I really like this movie. I do. Is it a good movie? Meh...debatable. Is it a great movie? Heavens no. However, it is always going to have a place in my heart for one hyphenated word: Snake-Eyes. Ray Park, the man known for his roles of Darth Maul in "Star Wars: Episode One - The Phantom Menace" and Toad in "X-Men" plays the role of the silent leather clad ninja, and KNOCKS IT OUT OF THE DAMN PARK! Im serious, his role was perfectly casted, right there with Hugh Jackman's Wolverine, and Ron Pearlman's Hellboy. The rest of the cast is...well...young. All in all, that's my only real complaint when it comes to the cast of the movie. The GIJoe are supposed to be 30 something, hard-nosed, no non-sense wartime fighters. Channing Tatum, Sienna Miller, Rachel Nichols, and even Cobra Commander himself, Joseph Gordon Levett seem nothing like the characters they are trying to re-create. Speaking of Sienna Miller, the entire idea of the Baroness being a 'brainwashed goodguy' was crap, clearly done simply to give Duke a love interest (though having Scarlett end up with Duke instead of stupid Ripcord would have been much better). Still, despite my rants and raves, there is alot of good here too. The visual effects and stunts are amazing (especially those featuring Park and Lee Byung-hung as Storm Shadow), and one of the coolest things of all, the Doctor himself, Christopher Eccelston as Destro. In a nutshell, "G.I.Joe: The Rise of Cobra" is a solid popcorn flick. It's pretty 'all flash with little substance', but it does leave quite a flash. I can't say its one of the best movies I've ever seen, but it's still heads and tails above ANY of the "Transformers" movies. I give "G.I.Joe The Rise of Cobra" a half-decent 2 1/2 out of 5 stars.

July 18th, 2012 - For my 200th review, what better movie to review then #3 on my list of Top Ten favorite movies of all time, "Memento". Directed by a pre-Batman Christopher Nolan, "Memento" tells the story of Leonard "Don't call me Lenny" Shelby, a insurance fraud investigator who suffers severe head trama during a home invasion, and has led to him no longer having a short term memory. During the break in, Leonard's wife was apparently raped and murdered by a man known only as John G. Leonard now must find and kill this man to get his revenge. The real cool thing about this film is that it's actually played in reverse. Well...sorta. See, the movie begins at the end, and every 2 minutes or so, the film cuts to a black and white portion of the film that plays chronologically (which serves as the real beginning of the film). As the colored scenes play in reverse, the black and white scenes play forwards. At the end of the film, the black and white turns to color, and in short, the entire movie played in full, serving as its own short-term memory test. It may seem a little gimmicky, but for this movie, it works. The cast is brilliant, with Guy Pierce as Leonard, Carrie-Anne Moss as barkeeper Natalie, and Joe Panteliano as 'Teddy' (spoiler warning! Teddy dies during the opening credits of the film by Leonard, but you need to follow the film to understand why). Complaints are minor. Some scenes come off as filler (including a sequence with a hooker where Leonard uses his condition to his benefit) and I will admit, the first time watching it, the film can be rather confusing, but it grows on you. I first saw "Memento" during a cinema course in college. I loved it then, and I love it now. I give "Memento" 5 out of 5 stars.

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