Review of Bichunmoo

Bichunmoo (2000)
2/10
Crouching Tiger meets Shakespeare? More like Boring meets Cheesy
3 July 2003
I'm still amazed at the large number of mixed and specially GOOD (!!) reviews this movie is getting here. I went to see Bichunmoo yesterday with a friend and, frankly, it had been a long time since I last saw such bad moviemaking.

Not a single good thing can be said about this film, excluding the involuntarily laughable moments (there are lots of these). Acting is terrible. Music is horrible (I'm not sure, but I think they even stole a piece from LOTR's soundtrack in one of the scenes); it varies from very uninspired pretendedly romantic scores in the (unbearable) love scenes to absurd techno-trash pieces during the fight scenes. As for the scenery, some scenes take place so obviously in a stage that any remote chance of your getting involved in the plot is mercilessly crushed.

However, the directing is probably the worst single thing about this film. Not only actors are very poorly directed, but from time to time you realize that the director is trying to build a "classy" scene. One example is a scene in which images of a bride getting dressed for her wedding are interposed with images of a mud cover being removed from the hero's face. The idea itself is not very brilliant, but the way it's carried out (specially the ludicrously fast pace of the scene) makes you think the director was probably on drugs for the most part of the production. Not to talk about the transitions from scene to scene... very often the characters simply run into each other in the middle of a forest. I suppose it was a very small forest. One last example to close this chapter: at one moment during the film there is a 10-year leap forward in time. Well, there's not even a small transition scene to hint this has happened, and the characters keep looking the same... How do you know 10 years have passed, then? You can certainly expect no help on the side of the director.

Atrezzo and special effects also deserve a comment. Everything in this film looks very, very fake, from swords (I was expecting Toys'r'us to be mentioned in the ending credits) to, specially, blood. The way blood spurts out of some of the wounds in this film is something to be seen. And also funny how, although the action is supposed to span along several years, it's always mid-autumn and the ground is permanently covered with fallen leaves. Oh, from time to time you can see the synthetic floor tiles under the leaves.

I would like to comment on the plot a bit. The plot itself, if you read a summary, and although far from original, is not too bad. A good production crew with good actors and a decent director could have made a neat movie out of it. But when you have an unoriginal, so-so base script it all comes down to the way you turn it into a film. And it's hard to imagine how it could have been done worse.

All in all, a very bad, boring movie. If you like martial arts movies and think "well, at least the fighting might be entertaining", abandon any hope. I do like martial arts movies, and the fights in this one are so dull they only contribute to the general boredom. Run away from Bichunmoo, you will only get a couple of laughs in scenes that are supposed to be dramatic and an unfair sense of hatred towards anything Korean.
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