Spasms (which as a title means nothing) begins on an island somewhere near New Guinea. A bunch of Aboriginal natives are performing some kind of tribal ritual dancing around a bonfire, complete with severed pigs heads on poles. Suddenly a giant snake appears, well according to the film it does as we don't actually see it at this point, it kills a few natives and then gets itself captured in a net by a hunter named Mendes (Miguel Fernandez). Mendes works for rich businessman Jason Kincaid (Oliver Reed) and sends the giant snake back to the U.S. via a cargo ship, before his untimely death. However, Warren Crowley (Al Waxman) works for a secret snake worshipping religious cult run by Rev. Thomas Thanner (George Bloomfield) who wants the giant snake for himself as he believes it's the 'reincarnation of our leader'. Thanner has hired Crowley to obtain the snake, by any means necessary. Crowley bribes a Sailor (Patrick Brymer) to steal the snake. While trying to do just that the Sailor is bitten by the snake and after his arm expands and bubbles he throws himself overboard. Kincaid wants the snake because while he was out hunting, it killed his brother and bit him. Now Kincaid has a telepathic link with the snake, Kincaid hires psychologist Dr. Tom Brazilian (Peter Fonda) to try & figure out the hold the snake has with him. Tom feels that telepathy is caused by a virus & and that the virus may have been present in the snakes venom therefore spiritually connecting both of them. Hey, I didn't write this stuff OK? So the snake arrives in America & Tom convinces a friend, Dr. Claire Rothman (Marilyn Lightstone) to keep it in her laboratory at the local University. That night Crowley & one of his goons Duncan Tyrone (Angus MacInnes) break into the University to try and steal the snake but only succeed in letting it escape into the night! A giant venomous snake is loose, Tom, along with Kincaid's niece Suzanne Cavadon (Kerrie Keane) decide they are responsible. As the snake starts to kill local residents they set about locating & destroying it, but Kincaid & Crowley have other plans for it. Directed by William Fruet this is one silly excuse for a film. The script by Don Enright from the novel Death Bite by Micheal Maryk & Brent Monahan is an absolute mess as you can probably tell from my plot synopsis which makes it sound a lot better than it actually is. The main problem is that Spasms has no sense of it's own absurdity, bizarre snake worshipping cults, giant serpents attacking naked women in the shower, telepathic links between humans & snakes are taken 100% seriously and played totally straight. It simply doesn't work & comes across as extremely silly. Having said that it moves along at a fair pace & isn't too boring at only 85 minutes. The ending was a bit of a disappointment too, rather lazy & predictable. The snake itself isn't seen in it's entirety, just glimpses to start with & by the end Fruet gives us a chance to scrutinise it's head which wasn't a good idea considering the cheapness of the effect. Spasms stand out moment has to be the part where Crowley is bitten, his body and face starts to expand & bubble in a very impressive & gross special effect by Dick Smith among others. There isn't any other gore or violence worth mentioning besides this. The shower scene is wholly gratuitous, did the female victim really need to be undressed taking a shower for the scene to work? Acting wise what on Earth are Oliver Reed & Peter Fonda doing in this complete & utter nonsense? All I can think is that they needed beer money badly, if you know what I mean. The film is generally well made with nice production values & cinematography, although director Fruet fails to inject the film with much flair or imagination. Spasms as a horror film fails totally, as a piece of so-so entertainment it's OK, as a bizarre head shaking curiosity it can't be bettered. Just about worth watching if your a die hard horror fan (like me), otherwise don't bother.
Review of Spasms
