This story comes across as very true and heartfelt, yet easily misunderstood. If you don't understand something of dysfunctional families and human psychology, this movie is not going to make sense for you- you will be looking for something that never comes.
When Sidda's offhand comment sparker her mother's rage, the ya-ya's intervene. What about this episode let's them know that it's more serious than any other falling out the two woman have had? Who knows. Maybe it's because Sidda's getting married, and the ya-ya's know that neither will really want the other to miss this important part of Sidda's life. Later, they are even more concerned when Sidda reveals that her past trauma is threatening her future happiness.
"What is the big secret that lets sidda's mother off the hook for years of abuse and alcoholism and abandonment" is NOT the point of the movie. The point comes in Sidda's question- what if I turn out to be like her, a woman who beats her children and leaves? Another big clue is given when Sidda says, "Me not lovin' mama was never the problem." (see- she loves her mom, despite many reviewers who may feel that this love or forgiveness is unfounded) Maggie Smith replies: "Her not loving you was never the problem either." That is the crux right there- now comes convincing Sidda of this truth. It's not forgiving her mother, but finally being able to stop blaming herself for the sudden change in her mother. The revelation, too subtle for many, is that Sidda didn't cause the change and Sidda herself won't suddenly become a monster when she is 'tied down' with marriage and children either.
I fault the movie for not fully explaining how the med's that Vivi took were later found to cause psychotic episodes, a fact which no one knew at the time. And for not stressing this link, and the shame that Vivi felt at having been involuntarily committed (a line in the dialog that could have easily been missed by many viewers) that was so deep that she would let her children think instead that she had abandoned them. Too much stress was layed on the emotional scenes- and not enough on some of the most important details.
Also, this movie made me cry constantly. I felt so drained at the end of this movie. I'd save this movie for a day when you don't have to get anything done, a day when you feel like you 'just need to cry' but don't know the reason. This movie will give you a reason.
It seems to me that the major flaws of this movie may have come in a somewhat sloppy adaptation and then later in post production and by assuming that the audience knows more than they do. And finally, by letting some of the most revealing lines skim by without much notice.
A good movie- for a really good cry.
When Sidda's offhand comment sparker her mother's rage, the ya-ya's intervene. What about this episode let's them know that it's more serious than any other falling out the two woman have had? Who knows. Maybe it's because Sidda's getting married, and the ya-ya's know that neither will really want the other to miss this important part of Sidda's life. Later, they are even more concerned when Sidda reveals that her past trauma is threatening her future happiness.
"What is the big secret that lets sidda's mother off the hook for years of abuse and alcoholism and abandonment" is NOT the point of the movie. The point comes in Sidda's question- what if I turn out to be like her, a woman who beats her children and leaves? Another big clue is given when Sidda says, "Me not lovin' mama was never the problem." (see- she loves her mom, despite many reviewers who may feel that this love or forgiveness is unfounded) Maggie Smith replies: "Her not loving you was never the problem either." That is the crux right there- now comes convincing Sidda of this truth. It's not forgiving her mother, but finally being able to stop blaming herself for the sudden change in her mother. The revelation, too subtle for many, is that Sidda didn't cause the change and Sidda herself won't suddenly become a monster when she is 'tied down' with marriage and children either.
I fault the movie for not fully explaining how the med's that Vivi took were later found to cause psychotic episodes, a fact which no one knew at the time. And for not stressing this link, and the shame that Vivi felt at having been involuntarily committed (a line in the dialog that could have easily been missed by many viewers) that was so deep that she would let her children think instead that she had abandoned them. Too much stress was layed on the emotional scenes- and not enough on some of the most important details.
Also, this movie made me cry constantly. I felt so drained at the end of this movie. I'd save this movie for a day when you don't have to get anything done, a day when you feel like you 'just need to cry' but don't know the reason. This movie will give you a reason.
It seems to me that the major flaws of this movie may have come in a somewhat sloppy adaptation and then later in post production and by assuming that the audience knows more than they do. And finally, by letting some of the most revealing lines skim by without much notice.
A good movie- for a really good cry.