Review of The Norseman

The Norseman (1978)
5/10
Remember the Battle of Rodan?
20 May 2006
**SPOILERS** Going on a rescue mission a ship-load of Norsemen make their way across the Great Sea, Atlantic Ocean, back in the 11th century to find their great leader King Eurich, Mel Ferrer. King Eurich together with his band of Viking seamen disappeared in the wilds of Vineland, prehistoric America, some time before.

Leading this rescue expedition is King Eurich's son the utterly fearless and courageous Thoruald, Lee Majors, who with his fellow Norsemen that included the on boat Wizard Death Dreamer, Jack Elam, who's always BS-ing and double-talking his way through the movie in order to avoid being put on a raft and sent out to sea by Thoruald as punishment for being a false prophet. Also on board is the gigantic and totally fearless and speechless Norseman Olif, Jimmy Clem, who had his tongue cut out in a battle off the African coast by the now honorary Norseman and Viking Thrall, Deacon Jones, a former African warrior chief who has since become Olif's best friend.

Landing on the far northern coast of Vineland, that looks a lot like Florida,the Norsemen run into trouble with the natives who attack them relentlessly killing a number of them even though the Norsemen take out far more natives then they lose of their own. The natives who outnumber the Norsemen by a ratio of at least of 100 to 1 is what makes their battle with the Noresmen very one sided and in favor of themselves. It will only be a matter of time before natives finish off the reminding valiant, but very hopelessly outnumbered, Norsemen with their human wave-like assaults.

One of the native women Winetta, Susie Coelho,who fell for the earlier "Blond Giants" or Nrosemen, led by King Eurich, get's in touch with Thoruald through sign language. Winetta tells him that his father is alive and being held captive together with a number of his Norsemen survivors by the native leader Klwnonga, Jerry Daniels, or Smiley. It was Klwnonga who double-crossed the friendly Norsemen by getting them drunk, as they were partying with the natives, and then after killing most of them had King Eurich and three of his fellow Norsemen blinded and put in a cave forced to grind whole corn kernels into cornmeal for the natives.

Thoruald who for some reason doesn't have on the usual Viking horned helmet, that his fellow Norsemen wear, but what looks like an ancient Greek or Roman one with a black Lone Ranger mask under it is lead to the cave by Winette. It's there where his father, King Eurich, and his fellow Norsemen are being held captive. After knocking off their native guards Thoruald & Co. make a run for it through the woods to the safety of the awaiting Norseman ship but not after having it out with the perusing natives. The Norseman/Native showdown results in Klwnonga/Smiley getting his eyes badly damaged by Death Dreamer's pet hawk. Thoruald and his fellow Norsemen don't sail out of danger and out to sea until the mighty Olif who voluntarily, against Thoruald's orders, stayed behind to hold off the hundreds of attacking wild and screaming natives all by himself. After miraculously surviving the ferocious native assault, with about a half dozen arrows still stuck in him, Olif is then also rescued.

This whole magilla, long story,is told to us in retrospect by the Norseman ship's houseboy, or ship-boy, young Eric, Chuck Pierce Jr. Eric has since become a full-fledged Viking Warrior like his friend and hero Thoruald who taught young Eric everything he knew about strength courage and most of all dedication to one's family friends and people. Thoruald also thought Eric not to give in or give up when all seems lost and hopeless and that more then anything else is what made the mighty Norsemen, or Vikings, the feared and invincible "Blond Warriors" that they were. Those hard hitting Norsemen were no one to fool around with like the natives in the movie sadly found out. These blond and fearless giants defeated against unbelievable odds all comers on four different continents, Asia Africa Europe and North America. It's and undeniable fact that the Norsemen could have easily conquered the entire civilized, as well as uncivilized, world back then if they only wanted too which they didn't.
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