1/10
Worse than you can even imagine
10 April 2008
Warning: Spoilers
I saw this DVD on a clearance rack for $5, and having never heard of it prior to that moment, decided to pick it up seeing as it had Dennis Hopper. Sadly, the movie barely even has Dennis Hopper in it, and the scenes he is present for showcase some of his worst acting to date.

I am truly amazed that the two main characters can even consider themselves actors due to their complete incompetence at acting in general. The plot is absolutely ridiculous and to make matters worse, the scenes involving the police officers and vehicles were not even slightly accurate to what would happen in a real situation similar to that.

Perhaps my favorite part of the movie was the sex scene, which had to be one of the most pathetic scenes ever put to film. The man's facial expression suggested that his toenails were being ripped off and was one of the few times that a scene in a film has brought me to tears from laughter. The gunfights are just as "mind-blowingly" bad. The film starts off with two men with machine guns surrounded by around ten police officers all within around 30 feet ducking behind police cars for cover. And amazingly, the police go through countless rounds without a hit on either man for a few minutes. Add in how the men who play the criminals aren't even trying due to their lack of acting skills whatsoever, and you have an awful beginning to an equally awful film.

Truly terrible movies only pop up once in a blue moon, but L.A.P.D.: To Protect and Serve sets the bar for bad. Not only is it an extremely non- entertaining piece of garbage, but it rivals Manos: Hands of Fate on my list for the worst movie I have ever seen. Dennis Hopper, who had brilliant performances in films such as Speed, should feel ashamed to even make a brief cameo in this sorry excuse for a film. Sadly, IMDb does not allow me to rate it lower than a 1/10, because LAPD does not deserve even a tenth of that point.
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