4/10
Absolutely Disgusting
9 October 2008
This adaptation was a travesty from about ten minutes in. And considering the talent involved, the shame should burn even further and last longer. Direction is where the train first flies off the tracks here. Did Chris Weitz read the book or the Cliffs Notes? Everything in the story flies forward at warp speed, and since there is much in the story that needs to be dwelt on, trimming details was not the way to go. If you remember, the first Harry Potter movie and The Fellowship of the Ring both clocked in at around three hours, because there was so much to reveal to the audience and no one complained about the length of those movies at the box office. The Armoured Bear fight lasts less than three minutes which doesn't give us enough time to appreciate the importance of what's happening. And I think Ian McKellen was wrong for the voice of Iorek. His voice carries too much majesty to convey the deep wounds of humiliation that Iorek has. I would've used Guy Pearce or Jeremy Irons.

Also wrong was taking events that carried a lot of emotional weight, like deaths of certain characters, and sweetening them up to "spare" the kids in the audience. Look, it's PG-13, which means the parents have been warned. I saw kids taken to The Dark Knight, and there's no way the Golden Compass could ever approach that kind of shock or horror. I did not like how Nicole Kidman looked as Mrs. Coulter. I think the makeup people could have done a little better than just pretend her face was a plastic mask. Also, there's no back story given on why she's so important to the story. It just occurs and the audience has to play catchup. When "Dune" was released in 1984, many thought that it was a good companion piece for those who had read the book, but to the uninitiated, it was a quagmire of confusion. I wouldn't even call this waste of two hours a worthwhile watch for those who have read the book, let alone those who have not.
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