Review of Aenigma

Aenigma (1987)
4/10
Snails: not really that scary, unless you happen to be a cabbage leaf. Or Lucio Fulci.
31 October 2008
The late Lucio Fulci, director of numerous Italian gore classics, obviously deemed gastropods so terrifying that he gave them starring roles as slimy killers in Ænigma, a 1987 clunker that clumsily blended elements of Carrie and Patrick to tell the tale of a comatose girl out to seek revenge on those responsible for her condition.

In the snails' unforgettably daft scene, a girl awakens to find herself smothered by the slow-moving molluscs, who ultimately suffocate the poor lass, covering her from head to foot in slime. It's just one bad moment out of many bad moments in a very bad film.

Ænigma opens with a young woman named Kathy (Milijana Zirojevic) excitedly preparing for a date (with the help of her friends) by selecting a nasty red dress and plastering on her make-up like a clown. Once ready for her night of romance (gold eyelids—check!; red cheeks—check!; hideous hairstyle—check!), the girl rushes to the door to meet her lucky beau.

Later that night, the couple park in a remote spot for a bit of canoodling. Kathy soon gets into the mood, and begins to moan loudly and writhe in pleasure, much to the delight of the small crowd of onlookers hiding in the bushes. Yes, Kathy is the subject of a mean school prank: the guy she is getting all gooey over doesn't really go for the minging clown look; he's only with the poor lass in order to humiliate her in front of his pals.

Realising the truth, Kathy runs away in tears, only to be hit by a car, ultimately ending up in intensive care.

Meanwhile, at the exclusive boarding school where Kathy lived with her mother, new student Eva Gordon (Lara Naszinsky) is getting used to her new environment. However, fitting in with the other girls might not prove to be easy, since Eva is being telepathically controlled by Kathy, who is looking to even the score with her bullies...

I get the distinct feeling that, with this particular film, Fulci was attempting a more stylish approach than usual:Ænigma is rather restrained in the gore department, and the boarding school setting and general ambiance is very reminiscent of the work of giallo genius Dario Argento. Unfortunately, Fulci is not quite in the same league as Argento when it comes to creating stunning visuals and a dreamlike atmosphere, and the result is a rather bland and unmemorable effort that leaves one longing for some yucky eyeball trauma or a bit of messy brain scrunching to spice things up.

The story, a weak mix of elements stolen from several much better films, doesn't make much sense (no explanation is given for how Kathy can conjure up snails and, in one equally silly scene, animate a marble statue), and the majority of the cast is pretty lousy. The only recognisable name in the film (recognisable to fans of low-budget trash, I mean) is B-movie star Jared Martin who is totally wasted in his role as a neurologist (although he does get to roll around naked with a lightly-oiled Naszinsky, which would be a fair enough reason for taking the gig!).

Ænigma is one for Fulci fans who, like me, have seen all of his better known films already and are now just ticking off the other titles from his filmography for the sake of completion.
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