Review of Hitman

Hitman (I) (2007)
1/10
HORRIBLE!!! Way to really ruin a franchise!
17 September 2011
Warning: Spoilers
Look, I'm going to be brutally honest, this is the worst movie I have ever seen. I have been a huge fan of the games since Hit-man: Codename 47 came out for the PC years ago. I don't have any idea how this piece of crap made it past the guys at IOI. When the Hit-man series came out, it had a bit less of a story line than the Trix rabbit but it evolved into a great story, and backstory. Here's my problem...

Movie: Agent 47 is played by Timothy Olyphant who is a horrible actor to begin with. He was actually so bad of an actor, in fact, that the director didn't even try to have him use a British accent. Games: Agent 47 is modelled from and even uses the voice of David Bateson who would have been better for the role in the movie anyway.

Movie: Agent 47, and all of his so called "brothers" were orphans trained by "The Organization" or whatever unoriginal name they called it. Games: Agent 47 and all of his brothers were clones who looked exctly alike (which means no black agents for example, sorry). They were cloned and trained by Dr. Ort-Meyer, some of them escaped, and even fewer went to work for the Agency or the ICA.

Movie: Agent 47 is seen shaving in the bathroom. Games: AGENT 47 DOESN'T NEED TO SHAVE! He was cloned without hair so as not to leave evidence at crime scenes.

Movie: Agent 47 is almost seduced by Nika but eventually develops a soft spot for her. Games: Agent 47 would have first killed her dead rather than to let her whore about on top of him.

Movie: Agent 47 pulls out katana swords from his back pockets that he had supposedly been carrying around with him the entire movie. Games: Agent 47's only weapons are two Hardballers, his fiber wire, and his syringes...never have I seen him conceal ninja swords just in case he runs into a group of people who want to kill him on a train.

I just hate everything about this movie. It could have been great! The games are far too dark for the way they took this movie. They ruined games that had an excellent storyline. Finally, I always said that Michael Fassbender would have been a much better 47 and Paul Verhoeven would have been a much better director.
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