c-conley90 Review of American Warships

American Warships (2012 Video)

Asylum churns another one out, and its just as lame as their other ones.

[2/10 · 19 September 2012]

American Warships aka American Battleship (thanks Hasbro/Universal) isn't very good and frankly sucks and I'm often surprised how people prefer this Asylum Rip-off over the big budget product. I know Battleship isn't that smart either or hell original. But at least it had a budget and wasn't apparently made to con suckers into picking this up at the store or renting it at red box. That and at least Battleship had some life in it compared to this, I mean this has some of the stiffest acting ever. . And these's movies are shoddy as all hell with literally PC graphic special effects. Some people say they are aware of this and it adds to the charm. Well, I don't it's just shoddy as all crap. Once again Battleship didn't have perfect special effects or anything, but at least it looked like it could afford to show a battleship being attacked. Another thing The Asylum does is apparently hire washed up actors to show up in there movie, for instance in this one both a bored looking Mario Van Peebles is in it as well as Carl "Apollo Creed" Weathers. Both looking like they would rather be in anything else. I would just say to watch this when it premieres on Syfy like we all know it will, then decide if you like its z-grade movie quality. And believe me when I say the quality is definitely Z and you will think how in the wide world a movie like this could be made in this year. It's shorter than Battleship, but really, it feels much longer than Battleship. The aliens look even more laughable than the Battleship ones, that looked like some Halo inspired aliens from the planet Who Ville apparently. The special effects are downright groan worthy, like I said at least Battleship had effects. This is Birdemic level, even the muzzle flash from the guns firing is CGI, apparently the cast was too sheepish to fire actual prop guns. Peebles and Weathers are the only two cast members with a level of actual acting skills that they use to the best they can. And marvel at the subsquent triple endings to the movie. Just when you think the movie will end it continues on and on. Plus do we need even lamer clichés than the one we have in Battleship? Bad stock footage of things like the pentagon, the Iowa at several points and the port where it's stationed. And please can the characters stop babbling about it being possible North Korean or Chinese weapons, when anybody with a brain would know that they wouldn't have that type of technology the aliens use. Lame shootouts with the aliens, and a bad climax that is to be in a word just so freaking anti-climatic.