Review of Warm Bodies

Warm Bodies (2013)
1/10
Borderline Unwatchable
14 April 2013
I really, really wanted to like this movie. I liked the idea of the perspective shift, the trailer narration presents R as an interesting misfit, a little too alive to be a zombie and much too dead to be anything else. I love a good horror-comedy, and what better to poke fun at then undead romance? The storyline centers around a near future where the unspecified virus breaks loose and the remaining humans build a fortress to keep out the zombies. It adds its own twist that zombies, while some stay conscious like the hero, R, others simply give up hope, and become the 'Bonies'; a skeletal group of who are merciless and bloodthirsty, you know, like a zombie. So in that, I guess I was thinking there was a good set up for some more psychological conflict, especially if it's supposed to be based off of Romeo and Juliet where people do, you know, *actually* die.

I don't know why I was expecting so much. I was already expecting zombies, but none of them have so much as a missing hand or a vacant eye socket. It's the equivalent of the glittering vampire; unmutilated zombies, who are pale, blue eyed, and stare longingly. Of all the plot holes you could drive a convertible through, that one bothered me the most. To be fair, I think one of the little kid zombies was missing teeth.

I would give you a synopsis of this movie but there doesn't seem to be a point. It's pretty typical boy meets girl, falls in love, overcomes differences. As for being a comedy, the plot is too straight forward for anything besides a few cheap laughs. It takes itself too seriously to poke fun at things like Julie's controlling father, or how awkward zombie kisses could be, and not seriously enough to give any kind of emotional depth to the characters. The relationship between Julie and R reminded me much more of Tarzan and Jane than Romeo and Juliet.

I suppose if you're looking for a fun date movie with the all the appeal of the word zombie and none of the gore, horror or anything relevant to the title, and you're still in high school, this movie has appeal. Maybe if you read the book you'll have some appreciation that I didn't. If you have to do your own laundry, or have ever had a relationship with any real emotional substance, Warm Bodies will at best leave you feeling a bit tepid.
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