Thousands of young ladies (ages 3 to 8) from around here collect unicorns. Usually a mom of one or more such youngsters needn't spend a lot of her time fretting over whether a cartoon release from a major studio is going to be "unicorn friendly." Most features referencing unicorns are animated, but not every cartoon features unicorns. Far from it. It's usually a case of "feast or famine" with unicorns. Either you have lots of unicorns in your flick--such as several of the MY LITTLE PONY videos, or the original FANTASIA release, as well as the MIA & ME television series--or unicorns don't exist for the purpose of your movie. (If unicorns appear in a live action film, it's usually NOT in a nice way, and it's something intended for older or much older girls, such as the first Harry Potter flick, or THE CABIN IN THE WOODS from two years ago.) When it was announced that MR. PEABODY AND SHERMAN would be preceded by an "updated" Rocky and Bullwinkle short, I did not think twice about there being a "red flag" raised in regard to suitability for young unicorn lovers. Both original versions of these cartoons were "unicorn neutral," meaning NO unicorns. Therefore, no alarm bells went off in my head that MR. PEABODY would need a red alert (like when a registered sex offender moves into your neighborhood), because I could not IMAGINE that he, or Sherman, Rocky, or Bullwinkle would allow anything to be said or shown to scare the BEJABBERS out of impressionable young "Unicorners," as we like to say around here.
Imagine my SHOCK & DISMAY when something called ABOUT HOME came onto the screen instead of our promised Rocky & Bullwinkle, AND BEGAN SPOUTING OFF ABOUT "CARNIVOROUS UNICORNS"!! How would YOU feel? What would YOU do? Naturally, my entire party of 12 walked out, exchanging our tickets for a showing of FROZEN (the "Sing-Along" version) which started 35 minutes later (and which most of us had seen once or twice previously; but we'd already "invested" a total of about $70 at the concession stand; this episode cost us AN ADDITIONAL $20 or so, between the refill charges and the Unplanned, Un-budgeted-for arcade games). This ABOUT HOME short was not making much sense BEFORE it got to its ill-considered reference to the gentle, magical horse. Obviously, ABOUT HOME director Todd Wilderman has never met a little lady. But someone on his studio's staff SHOULD have been bright enough to realize that you do NOT bring in some horror gambit from THE CABIN IN THE WOODS to an animated short sprung on parents WITH NO WARNING. I know of two or three young ladies who have woken up screaming in the middle of the night, thinking a unicorn was about to eat them. You do NOT tell millions of kids in the single digits (age-wise) that there ain't no Santy-Claus, and you do NOT scare thousands of young lady Unicorners that their beloved magical creature might eat them for dinner!
Imagine my SHOCK & DISMAY when something called ABOUT HOME came onto the screen instead of our promised Rocky & Bullwinkle, AND BEGAN SPOUTING OFF ABOUT "CARNIVOROUS UNICORNS"!! How would YOU feel? What would YOU do? Naturally, my entire party of 12 walked out, exchanging our tickets for a showing of FROZEN (the "Sing-Along" version) which started 35 minutes later (and which most of us had seen once or twice previously; but we'd already "invested" a total of about $70 at the concession stand; this episode cost us AN ADDITIONAL $20 or so, between the refill charges and the Unplanned, Un-budgeted-for arcade games). This ABOUT HOME short was not making much sense BEFORE it got to its ill-considered reference to the gentle, magical horse. Obviously, ABOUT HOME director Todd Wilderman has never met a little lady. But someone on his studio's staff SHOULD have been bright enough to realize that you do NOT bring in some horror gambit from THE CABIN IN THE WOODS to an animated short sprung on parents WITH NO WARNING. I know of two or three young ladies who have woken up screaming in the middle of the night, thinking a unicorn was about to eat them. You do NOT tell millions of kids in the single digits (age-wise) that there ain't no Santy-Claus, and you do NOT scare thousands of young lady Unicorners that their beloved magical creature might eat them for dinner!