C.B. Hustlers (1976)
1/10
::Rolls Eyes::
24 May 2014
Already with the first scene of players, you see the driver and a woman sitting in a van, acting as if they're traveling on the road. Horrible lighting and the fact that the van was obviously being rocked since the background never moved, told me this would be a stinker. Within the first eight minutes, a very beautiful woman exposes her chest and buttocks, but one has to be very desperate to want to continue watching this. Maybe there's a taste for the film from its period nostalgia, perhaps?

The movie was made only to cash in on the "free love," Scooby-type vans, and the CB radio / trucking craze, popularized by the film and hit single, "Convoy." It's actually a film to snicker at, because the scenes were so poorly scripted. I'm sure none of the players ever became an A-lister. A dog wearing a Go Pro would probably come back with better scenes than the cinematography here. For instance, two men sit at desks in a small room, eating food, while making dumb comments as the CB radio blares. Would they ever leave that place, which looks like the size of a converted jail cell?

It makes me wonder what they're doing today. Did the cast and crew expect this film would ever take off, or where they simply desperate for money or fame? CB Hustlers, sad to say, is a waste of one's time. You'll never get your 85 minutes back. The only way to revive such a film would be to send it up to the Satellite of Love for Joel and the robots to watch.
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