Bring up the name of director Tobe Hooper and most will wax wistful over The Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Some of his lesser known films should be re-discovered, especially the Grand Guignol-fueled The Funhouse and the original TV version of Salem's Lot, which still ranks as one of the best Stephen King adaptations ever. And it is hard to believe that people still need to be reminded that Hooper is responsible for directing cathartic sentimental horror classic Poltergeist (and not Steven Spielberg). Unfortunately, Hooper's career hit the skids in the mid-80s and for anyone wondering why, look no further than the debacle of Lifeforce.
The story - such as it is - has something to do with a joint effort between US and UK astronauts to study up close Halley's Comet and discovering a mysterious craft traveling in tandem with it, wherein lies the strikingly beautiful Mathilda May and two interchangeable hunks slumbering in crystal coffins. Naturally, these beings end up back in earth, where May and her cohorts rouse themselves to terrorize London by sucking the energy out of everyone they come in contact with and creating an army of zombie-like beings. American astronaut Steve Railsback - a survivor of the earlier mission - and British army officer Peter Firth team with doctor Frank Finlay to stop these space vampires and their reign of destruction.
The synopsis makes this sound like a fun film. It is not. The film is inexcusably tedious and a real chore to sit through. There is literally no character development, it jumps around narratively without rhyme or reason, and is often near impossible to follow exactly what is happening on screen. There are a lot of effects light shows to distract the eye, but the mind needs to be in a vegetative state to view this tripe. Apparently there are catastrophic events happening, but we are shown few of them and instead have them related to us in endless scenes by old interchangeable British men sweating or shouting in conference rooms. Given that Railsback and Firth are tasked with tracking down and stopping the vampires, you would think they would share some chemistry or banter as partners. They have zero chemistry together and are humorless and seem to be going through the motions without much urgency. The dialog veers between tedious exposition, stating the obvious, and howlers that must be heard to be believed, delivered by stone-faced actors apparently thinking they were cast in Hamlet.
Look quick for Patrick Stewart in a nonsense role a physician at an asylum. Firth and Finlay, both notable Oscar nominees of the past, are wasted wandering about in a tight-faced daze. Railsback is abysmal on levels previously unimaginable. Once a promising actor, his career derailed after this mess with his only other notable subsequent appearance being in an X-Files episode. He appears haggard and his performance lurches between looking lost and bad over-the-top Shatner-esque emotional outbursts.
As the vampire queen, May is stunning looking, but that is literally all the part calls for. The vampires slumber in the nude, so she spends pretty much every moment on screen wandering about full frontally starkers glaring at people before sucking them dry of their energy. She does not seem particularly menacing. Ironically, there are two male vampires who apparently are also trotting around naked, but the filmmakers are not especially interested in them or what they are up to. Neither actor playing the male space vampires gets so much as a bare butt shot, but the filmmakers make sure we see enough of May to near function as her gynecologist. Just noting that a bit of titillation balance here would have been welcome.
A spectacular exciting ending may well have saved this mess, but after more than an hour of incoherence, awful acting, bad dialog, noise, flashy effects and painful boredom, the opaque conclusion is inert and will leave more than a few viewers just scratching their heads. Not sure how this film has any fans considering it fails at serious sci-fi and fails at being cheesy fun.
The story - such as it is - has something to do with a joint effort between US and UK astronauts to study up close Halley's Comet and discovering a mysterious craft traveling in tandem with it, wherein lies the strikingly beautiful Mathilda May and two interchangeable hunks slumbering in crystal coffins. Naturally, these beings end up back in earth, where May and her cohorts rouse themselves to terrorize London by sucking the energy out of everyone they come in contact with and creating an army of zombie-like beings. American astronaut Steve Railsback - a survivor of the earlier mission - and British army officer Peter Firth team with doctor Frank Finlay to stop these space vampires and their reign of destruction.
The synopsis makes this sound like a fun film. It is not. The film is inexcusably tedious and a real chore to sit through. There is literally no character development, it jumps around narratively without rhyme or reason, and is often near impossible to follow exactly what is happening on screen. There are a lot of effects light shows to distract the eye, but the mind needs to be in a vegetative state to view this tripe. Apparently there are catastrophic events happening, but we are shown few of them and instead have them related to us in endless scenes by old interchangeable British men sweating or shouting in conference rooms. Given that Railsback and Firth are tasked with tracking down and stopping the vampires, you would think they would share some chemistry or banter as partners. They have zero chemistry together and are humorless and seem to be going through the motions without much urgency. The dialog veers between tedious exposition, stating the obvious, and howlers that must be heard to be believed, delivered by stone-faced actors apparently thinking they were cast in Hamlet.
Look quick for Patrick Stewart in a nonsense role a physician at an asylum. Firth and Finlay, both notable Oscar nominees of the past, are wasted wandering about in a tight-faced daze. Railsback is abysmal on levels previously unimaginable. Once a promising actor, his career derailed after this mess with his only other notable subsequent appearance being in an X-Files episode. He appears haggard and his performance lurches between looking lost and bad over-the-top Shatner-esque emotional outbursts.
As the vampire queen, May is stunning looking, but that is literally all the part calls for. The vampires slumber in the nude, so she spends pretty much every moment on screen wandering about full frontally starkers glaring at people before sucking them dry of their energy. She does not seem particularly menacing. Ironically, there are two male vampires who apparently are also trotting around naked, but the filmmakers are not especially interested in them or what they are up to. Neither actor playing the male space vampires gets so much as a bare butt shot, but the filmmakers make sure we see enough of May to near function as her gynecologist. Just noting that a bit of titillation balance here would have been welcome.
A spectacular exciting ending may well have saved this mess, but after more than an hour of incoherence, awful acting, bad dialog, noise, flashy effects and painful boredom, the opaque conclusion is inert and will leave more than a few viewers just scratching their heads. Not sure how this film has any fans considering it fails at serious sci-fi and fails at being cheesy fun.