Aishe, sister one of 3, wanders around some Scottish shindig where a bunch of drunks are dancing the Polka. She discovers sister 2 getting all hot & heavy with her husband which sets off a chain reaction melee where Aishe's stabbed in the tussle. In an eye for an eye retaliation second sister, Hannah, turns Yakuza informer and lops her hand off as an offering. But alas, where, or who, is sister 3?
Why do they all speak English, and live in America, if this is all steeped in Balkan Tradition? By rights the entire movie should be in subtitles.
Considering how boring this opening wedding scene is, I can only fantasize that the guy with goofy teeth is the killer and that the movie's key McGuffin is the missing middle tooth that needs reconnecting to the gums which might solve the movie's mystery. Maybe the McGuffin finds sister 3 - Alice?
Oh man, 23-minutes in and this movie punishes you like 'The Man in The Iron Mask.' It's like your head's been placed in a torture device to suffocate you. It's like a baby alien wrapped around the iron mask depriving you of any action, advancement, or oxygen.
The missing tooth has to be the key in unlocking this boredom? Find the goofy tooth already.
33-minutes in and, alas, still nothing has happened. Where oh where is sister 3 - Alice?
Two women plant their feet in some badly designed CGI bougainvillea thorns and what this means - who knows? Someone else offers a chicken drumstick, lollipop, and a rose to the thorns. Bryan Ferry just had a stroke near the thorns... and bled. Another guy wakes up in a field of grass naked. A high school jock tries to get fresh with a junior high minor and some 'Mortal Kombat' character comes along and blows poorly designed CGI bugs in his face. Oh alas, is she Alice?
Turns out that the guy with the missing tooth is Tim Taylor's nosy neighbor Wilson. You know the one that used to look over the fence all the time? Well, it's 'ole gums here!
56-minutes in and NOTHING has happened still.
Some Pinocchio-faced woman just unconventionally boiled a sock on the hob. She then gouges her eyes out with the hot implement and, alas, blisters her poor eyelids. That was clever. I bet if she had the McGuffin that would never have happened?
Oh alas, can we find the missing tooth and end this already, please? This movie is baseless. There's lots of exposition to navigate one through this movie as a guide but the story's a muddled mess of confusion still. It's a story that didn't need to be told as there's nothing worthwhile to tell.
And, alas, I don't have the vocabulary to tell how unnecessary this movie is. Hey movie makers of 'The Accursed?' When it sounds like a great idea to make a movie at least write an interesting story line first. You know - draft 1 and 2 and so on?
Some finale - Gums survives and spoon-feeds the Pinocchio-faced woman some porridge and she screams her disapproval of the flavor and the movie ends. Oh alas.
Why do they all speak English, and live in America, if this is all steeped in Balkan Tradition? By rights the entire movie should be in subtitles.
Considering how boring this opening wedding scene is, I can only fantasize that the guy with goofy teeth is the killer and that the movie's key McGuffin is the missing middle tooth that needs reconnecting to the gums which might solve the movie's mystery. Maybe the McGuffin finds sister 3 - Alice?
Oh man, 23-minutes in and this movie punishes you like 'The Man in The Iron Mask.' It's like your head's been placed in a torture device to suffocate you. It's like a baby alien wrapped around the iron mask depriving you of any action, advancement, or oxygen.
The missing tooth has to be the key in unlocking this boredom? Find the goofy tooth already.
33-minutes in and, alas, still nothing has happened. Where oh where is sister 3 - Alice?
Two women plant their feet in some badly designed CGI bougainvillea thorns and what this means - who knows? Someone else offers a chicken drumstick, lollipop, and a rose to the thorns. Bryan Ferry just had a stroke near the thorns... and bled. Another guy wakes up in a field of grass naked. A high school jock tries to get fresh with a junior high minor and some 'Mortal Kombat' character comes along and blows poorly designed CGI bugs in his face. Oh alas, is she Alice?
Turns out that the guy with the missing tooth is Tim Taylor's nosy neighbor Wilson. You know the one that used to look over the fence all the time? Well, it's 'ole gums here!
56-minutes in and NOTHING has happened still.
Some Pinocchio-faced woman just unconventionally boiled a sock on the hob. She then gouges her eyes out with the hot implement and, alas, blisters her poor eyelids. That was clever. I bet if she had the McGuffin that would never have happened?
Oh alas, can we find the missing tooth and end this already, please? This movie is baseless. There's lots of exposition to navigate one through this movie as a guide but the story's a muddled mess of confusion still. It's a story that didn't need to be told as there's nothing worthwhile to tell.
And, alas, I don't have the vocabulary to tell how unnecessary this movie is. Hey movie makers of 'The Accursed?' When it sounds like a great idea to make a movie at least write an interesting story line first. You know - draft 1 and 2 and so on?
Some finale - Gums survives and spoon-feeds the Pinocchio-faced woman some porridge and she screams her disapproval of the flavor and the movie ends. Oh alas.