1/10
Witchy Whoa, Man
8 October 2023
Andrew Prine, who has been pretty good in everything he has ever done except this, plays Simon, a man who practices witchcraft from his home in a storm drain. He meets Turk (George Paulsin) in jail, and Turk introduces Simon to Hercules (Gerald York), a local money man who has powerful friends and makes things happen. Simon also meets Linda (Brenda Scott), the district attorney's stoned daughter. Simon is bilked out of some money by a skeptical client, and kills him with a curse. Now, everyone wants Simon's services. Simon has big plans of his own- he wants to join the other gods he worships, and help rule the world. Those plans go awry, and Simon takes revenge on the city, and those around him.

This came out in 1971, and features every reason people roll their eyes when others wax nostalgic about 1970's hippie culture. Director Kessler pulls all the psychedelic stops here, the climax looks like rejected scenes from "2001: A Space Odyssey." The cast throws around terms like "cat," "groovy," "far out," "weed," and "pad." The wardrobe is hallucinogenic, with the designs assaulting your senses. One character's bisexuality is treated with reverence, as if an important social point was being made. Linda is stoned all the time, which makes her the character you care the least about. Simon's incantations are ludicrous and funny. Most of his "witchcraft" consists of waving a dagger in the air and reciting "electric, magnetic" repeatedly- watch for the scene where he has a one-sided conversation with a large tree. This film tries to be serious, almost like a docudrama, but fails. It is funny, without meaning to be. "Simon, King of the Witches" is smoke and mirrors.
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