An Amish Murder (2013 TV Movie)
4/10
If you're reading this review, it means I'm not writing it anymore
19 January 2024
Warning: Spoilers
Back in the days before I got reformed I used to have some partners that were Amish. Not being from the US originally, I always pronounced it Ame-ish, rhyming with "flame-ish" and nobody ever corrected me, which is pretty funny. I respected those fellas though, because even though they are known for being religious, they got some very competent criminals. But this review is about the movie. I was disappointed they didn't focus more on the Amish criminal underground instead of wasting time on random murders that nobody cares about.

I didn't enjoy this movie much and I don't expect you will either. I got up a few times to make a some sandwiches to eat and to listen to some music and dance, but I didn't dislike the movie enough to turn it off, and eventually I came back to see the end, which I didn't enjoy except for the fire. It would have been nice to see the killer get burned to death, but the filmmaker robbed me of that pleasure and I need to check and see who he is so I don't watch anything else he's involved with.

Naaa. I say give this one a hard pass, but my advice will probably go unnoticed since it's unlikely you'll read this in the first place. So there's that.
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