Red Sonja (1985)
3/10
Red-Headed Woman
8 April 2024
Representing a perfunctory attempt by Dino De Laurentis to create a distaff 'Conan the Barbarian', 'Red Sonja' hails from the days when Arnold Schwarzenegger still wore his hair down to his shoulders; and while set in the mythical past the hairstyle Brigitte Nielsen - who gets an 'Introducing' credit - wears in the title role is more evocative of the 1980s.

Playing a far less substantial amazon than her later role as Karla in 'Beverly Hills Cop II', despite her name Nielsen is rather colourless in the part. Although supposed to have issues with men few of them are well defined and her most substantial adversary is actually Sandahl Bergman's evil queen - who keeps a spider the size of a sheep as a pet - which could have made it resemble a medieval version of 'Dallas' if it had given her sufficient screen time; but the long hoped-for confrontation (SLIGHT SPOILER COMING:) takes an unconscionable time in coming.
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