Dallas (TV Series)

Mastectomy: Part 1 (1979)

Larry Hagman: J.R. Ewing

Quotes 

• J.R. Ewing : [taking a sip from Kristin's coffee]  That woman just cannot make a decent cup of coffee!

• Kristin Shepard : [brought coffee, joins sleeping lover on bed]  The well was sputted, J.R., and it's a real gusher.

  J.R. Ewing : [eyes open, still sleepy:]  Hmm?

  Kristin Shepard : [lyrical]  The core is all gray shale, we've just put in the surface pipe, and I've just called for the blow-up preventer.

  J.R. Ewing : [smiles contentedly, then snorts:]  What time is it?

  Kristin Shepard : I knew that would wake up an oil-man.

  J.R. Ewing : [snickers, then looks at watch, realizing:]  It's morning! You let me sleep here all night?

  Kristin Shepard : I didn't have the heart. And besides, it was nice.

  J.R. Ewing : [gets up hurriedly]  I told you never to do that. Why didn't you wake me up, anyhow? Lord sakes...

  Kristin Shepard : Well, you tossed and turned, and you seemed so exhausted.

  J.R. Ewing : [from bathroom]  Well, you're an exciting young woman, sugar. Gets me all... keyed up.

  [chuckles] 

  Kristin Shepard : Thanks, J.R. But there are other reasons for your being keyed up.

  J.R. Ewing : Yeah, where are my clothes? Where are they at?

  Kristin Shepard : Well, I put a fresh suit in the bathroom, and I'm taking last night's to the cleaners.

  J.R. Ewing : Oh, okay, I got 'em, I got 'em. Listen, I really... appreciate it, but let's not do this again.

  Kristin Shepard : Why, I like waking up with you in the morning.

  J.R. Ewing : Yeah, yeah, I know, I know. But that is no excuse. They're...

  [comes out of bathroom] 

  Kristin Shepard : J.R., I wish you'd let me help you.

  J.R. Ewing : [sighs]  Well, you're doing fine, darling, just fine.

  Kristin Shepard : No, I mean, I know how worried you are.

  J.R. Ewing : I got everything under control.

  Kristin Shepard : Not exactly, J.R., considering everything Ewing owns is mortgaged, including Southfork.

  J.R. Ewing : Nothing for you to trouble yourself about, darling.

  Kristin Shepard : Well, I know how concerned you are about Uncle Jock finding out. Maybe if you'd talk to me, it would help you relax.

  J.R. Ewing : Well, now, Kristin, if you know about it, and I know about it,

  [shrugs] 

  J.R. Ewing : then what have we got to talk about?

  [his hands on her shoulders, looks into her eyes:] 

  J.R. Ewing : You know how I'm gonna relax? If you get your tail out of here, and get to the office before I do.

  [kisses her, slaps her waist as she turns to leave, chuckles:] 

  J.R. Ewing : Go on, go on!

  [as Kristin is out the door, takes sip from cup] 

  J.R. Ewing : That woman just cannot make a decent cup of coffee.