Star Trek: Deep Space Nine (TV Series)

Take Me out to the Holosuite (1998)

Avery Brooks: Captain Benjamin 'Ben' Sisko

Photos 

Quotes 

• Captain Sisko : Alright Niners! Let's hear some chatter! Hey batter!

  Kasidy Yates : Hey batter batter batter batter batter!

  Leeta : Hey batter batter batter batter batter batter!

  Worf : Death to the opposition!

• Captain Sisko : [to Odo]  You can't tell me that ball was over the plate! What were you doing, regenerating?

• Captain Sisko : [shouting]  You stole the run from us! You stole it just as if you reached up and tore it off the score board!

  [begins poking Odo in the chest] 

  Captain Sisko : You stole it from us!

  Odo : You - you're out of here!

  Captain Sisko : What?

  Odo : No player shall at any time make contact with the umpire in any manner. The prescribed penalty for the violation is immediate ejection from the game. Rule Number 4.06, subsection a, paragraph four. Look it up, but do it in the stands. You're GONE!

• Captain Sisko : It's been a long time.

  Captain Solok : 10 years, 2 months, 5 days.

  Captain Sisko : You mean you don't know it to the minute?

  Captain Solok : Of course I do. But Humans are often irked by such precision - especially the more emotional Humans.

• [Sisko has recruited Odo to fill the post of the umpire in their baseball game] 

  Captain Sisko : Remember, the game is in less than two weeks, so you better start to, er, work on your moves.

  Odo : My "moves"?

• Captain Sisko : [telling the story of him and Solok to Kasidy]  We were in the same class at the academy. One weekend, I was with some friends in a bar off campus, The Launching Pad, when Solok came in with a group of Vulcan cadets. Said they were doing research on 'illogical human bonding rituals'. We didn't take too kindly to that.

  Kasidy Yates : And you'd had a few drinks.

  Captain Sisko : One or two. Well, we got into a debate and Solok said that Vulcans were naturally superior to Humans and other 'emotionally handicapped species'. Of course, I took the opposite position. So there I am, drunk and debating logic versus emotion with a smug and very sober Vulcan. Well, to make a long story short, I decided that the best way to prove that Humans were every bit the equal of Vulcans was to challenge him to a wrestling match.

  Kasidy Yates : Wrestling?

  Captain Sisko : All I wanted to do was wipe that arrogant look off his face so with everyone watching, in the heat of the moment, I challenged him.

  Kasidy Yates : And?

  Captain Sisko : I ended up in the infirmary with a separated shoulder, two cracked ribs and a very bruised ego.

  Kasidy Yates : [laughing]  Oh Ben! I don't mean to laugh but what did you expect? A Vulcan has three times the strength of a human.

  Captain Sisko : [whistles]  And they're faster too. But you're right - I got what I deserved. And if it had ended right there it would've been fine. But it didn't. Solok took every opportunity to remind me about our match. He used to point me out whenever I walked across the campus. In fact, he wrote 5 psychology papers about our match. I became the living embodiment of why Vulcans were inherently superior to Humans.

  Kasidy Yates : You don't mean he was gloating? A Vulcan?

  Captain Sisko : That's exactly what I mean. He may have hidden it beneath that Vulcan calm of his, but he loved every minute of it. And you'd think that once we graduated it would have stopped. But it didn't. Over the years, Solok wrote over a dozen papers on Vulcan/Human comparative profiles, and at the beginning of every paper is an analysis of that damn wrestling match.

  Kasidy Yates : And now he comes to your station and announces that he's put together a baseball team.

  Captain Sisko : Solok doesn't care about baseball. All he wants to do is rub it in my nose on more time but this time he's using my game. My game!

• Captain Solok : [insincerely]  I understand you were recently honored with the Christopher Pike Medal for Valor. Congratulations.

  Captain Sisko : [just as insincerely]  Thank you. And congratulations to you. I heard you received your medal last month.

  Captain Solok : My second, actually.

• Captain Sisko : There is more to baseball than physical strength. It's, uh... it's about courage; and it's also about faith; and it is also about heart. And if there's one thing our Vulcan friends lack, it's heart.

• [last lines] 

  Captain Sisko : [offering Solok his signature covered baseball]  Would you like to sign it?

• Captain Sisko : Well, there's an old saying: those who can't - coach!

• Captain Sisko : If you have some time, one day - maybe you can teach me how to bunt.

  Rom : Sure!

  Rom : [to Leeta]  What's a bunt?

• Doctor Bashir : So, when is this "Clash of the Titans"?

  Captain Sisko : Two weeks, in holosuite 5.

  Colonel Kira : What's the contest?

  [Sisko produces a round white object and places it on the table] 

  Captain Sisko : Baseball!