The Wolf of Wall Street (2013)
Rob Reiner: Max Belfort
Photos
Quotes
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Max Belfort : What kind of hooker takes credit cards?
Donnie Azoff : A rich one!
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Max Belfort : $430,000 in one month, Jordy. Huh?
Jordan Belfort : They're business expenses.
Max Belfort : Jordy, look what you've got here. Look at this! $26,000 for one fucking dinner!
Jordan Belfort : No, no, this can be explained. Dad, we had clients, Pfizer clients. Champagne.
Nicky Koskoff : The porterhouse from Argentina.
Jordan Belfort : Expensive champagne and the what, we had to buy champagne.
[to Donnie]
Jordan Belfort : And you brought in all the sides... Tell him about the sides.
Donnie Azoff : I ordered the sides, so...
Max Belfort : Sides? Sides? $26,000 worth of sides? What are these sides? They cure cancer?
Donnie Azoff : The sides did cure cancer, that's the problem, that's why they were so expensive.
Jordan Belfort : [bursting into laughter] Shut the fuck up!
Donnie Azoff : I'm serious.
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Max Belfort : Jordy, one of these days the chickens are gonna come home to roost.
Jordan Belfort : You're lookin' at me like I'm crazy.
Max Belfort : Crazy? This is obscene!
Jordan Belfort : [voice over] It was obscene, in the normal world. I mean, who the fuck wanted to live there?
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Max Belfort : [hears a phone] Who the fuck has the goddamn gall to call this house on a Tuesday night? God damn it!
Leah Belfort : [watching TV] You're gonna miss it!
Max Belfort : Tell me something I don't know, I wait all week for the fucking Equalizer and they have to fucking...
[picks up the phone, then calmly, in a transatlantic accent]
Max Belfort : Hello?... Jean? How are you, Jean?... Righto, Jean, that'll be great... Cheerio!
[Hangs up. Explodes]
Max Belfort : Fucking half-wit!
Leah Belfort : You missed it!
Max Belfort : [Furious] God damn it!
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Donnie Azoff : The IRS, they allow for T&A, it's fine.
Max Belfort : T&E. T and E. It's T and E!
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Jordan Belfort : I want to stay married, Dad, but it's crazy out there. Some of these girls, you should see them. Oh, my God. They're fuckin' - the things they're doing now, Pops, I mean, I mean, it's on a whole other level.
Max Belfort : Really?
Jordan Belfort : And they're all shaved too.
Max Belfort : Get outta here.
Jordan Belfort : All shaven now.
Max Belfort : Are you kidding me?
Jordan Belfort : Yeah.
Max Belfort : No bush?
Jordan Belfort : Bald. Bald as as China doll.
Max Belfort : No bush?
Jordan Belfort : No bush.
Max Belfort : Oh my God.
Jordan Belfort : All the sudden I - one week - nobody had anything down there any more.
Max Belfort : It's a new world.
Jordan Belfort : They're bald - they're bald from the eyebrows down.
Max Belfort : Wow!
Jordan Belfort : Nothing. Not a stitch. It's like lasers.
Max Belfort : Wow. New world. See. I was born too - too early.
Jordan Belfort : I've never been a fan of the bush, to be honest.
Max Belfort : Really?
Jordan Belfort : Yeah.
Max Belfort : I don't mind it.
