The Big Bang Theory (TV Series)
The Electric Can Opener Fluctuation (2009)
Johnny Galecki: Leonard Hofstadter
Photos
Quotes
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Leonard Hofstadter : Will you please take that stupid hat off?
Howard Wolowitz : No, I want to blend in.
Rajesh Koothrappali : To what? Toy Story?
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Penny : Leonard, you're back!
Leonard Hofstadter : Yeah, I just stopped by to...
[Penny grabs Leonard and kisses him]
Leonard Hofstadter : [taken completely by surprise] Yeah, so, hi.
Penny : Hi!
[Penny pulls Leonard into her apartment and slams the door]
Howard Wolowitz : Damn it, I should have gone over and told her we were back.
Rajesh Koothrappali : [sarcastically] Yeah, it was first come, first serve.
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Leonard Hofstadter : Hey. Listen, since we got, you know, interrupted last night, I didn't have a chance to give you this.
Penny : Oh, Leonard, you shouldn't have. Oh, boy! What is it?
Leonard Hofstadter : It's a snowflake. From the North Pole.
Penny : Are you serious?
Leonard Hofstadter : Uh-huh. It'll last forever. I preserved it in a one percent solution of polyvinyl acetal resin.
Penny : Oh, my God. That's the most romantic thing anyone's ever said to me that I didn't understand.
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Leonard Hofstadter : It was the only way to make him happy.
Penny : Why did you have to make him happy?
Leonard Hofstadter : Because when he wasn't happy, we wanted to kill him. There was even a plan! We were going to throw his Kindle outside and when he went to get it, lock the door and let him freeze to death.
Sheldon Cooper : That seems like a bit of an overreaction!
Leonard Hofstadter : No. The overreaction was the plan to tie your limbs to four different sled dog teams and yell "mush!"
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Leonard Hofstadter : [Whispering] Do not make a sound.
Sheldon Cooper : Whispering "do not make a sound" is a sound.
Leonard Hofstadter : Damn his Vulcan hearing!
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Leonard Hofstadter : I don't want to go to Texas!
Howard Wolowitz : Oh, right, and I do? My people already crossed the desert once. We're done!
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Rajesh Koothrappali : I'm sorry, this does not look like Texas. Where's the tumbleweeds? Where's the saloons?
Leonard Hofstadter : Saloons?
Rajesh Koothrappali : Yeah, like in the movies I saw growing up in India. You know, Four For Texas, Yellow Rose of Texas...
Howard Wolowitz : This neighborhood is more Texas Chainsaw Massacre.
Rajesh Koothrappali : I was really hoping to see a cattle drive.
Leonard Hofstadter : What can I tell you? They probably have steaks on sale at that big-ass Costco over there.
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Leonard Hofstadter : I can't believe you bought a red cowboy hat.
Howard Wolowitz : Hello? I'm wearing a red turtleneck. Plus it was the only boys' large they had.
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[last lines]
Leonard Hofstadter : How about that? I finally caught a break.
Penny : Uh-huh.
Leonard Hofstadter : You know how they say when friends have sex it can get weird?
Penny : Sure.
Leonard Hofstadter : Why does it have to get weird?
Penny : I don't know.
Leonard Hofstadter : I mean, we were friends, and now we're more than friends. We're whatever this is. But why label it, right? I mean, it is what it is and...
Penny : Leonard?
Leonard Hofstadter : Yeah.
Penny : It's weird.
Leonard Hofstadter : Totally.
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Leonard Hofstadter : Oh, thank God we're home!
Howard Wolowitz : I can't believe we spent three months in that frozen hell.
Rajesh Koothrappali : It was like a snowy nightmare from which there was no awakening.
Sheldon Cooper : I don't know what Arctic expedition you guys were on, but I thought it was a hoot and a half.
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Howard Wolowitz : Hey, how's Sheldon doing?
Leonard Hofstadter : Well, he came out of his room this morning wearing his Darth Vader helmet and tried to choke me to death with the Force, so I'd say... a little better.
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[repeated line]
Leonard Hofstadter : [trying to get intimate with Penny] Man, I cannot catch a break!
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Penny : Well, wait a second, Leonard, come on, how can you not go? He's your best friend.
Leonard Hofstadter : Well, I already saw him naked. Come here.
Penny : No. I promise I will be here when you get back. Just go help Sheldon.
Leonard Hofstadter : Really?
Penny : Yeah. We waited a few months. We can wait a few more days.
[they kiss]
Leonard Hofstadter : Maybe *you* can.