(2002 Video)

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Embarrassing
lor_19 August 2022
From its idiotic dialogue, constant self-deprecating comments about it just being porn to the utterly fake looking studio sets pretending to be outdoor scenes "Hard Tails" is vignette porn at its cheesiest. Promise at the end of a sequel was frightening.

Even though it came from the major distributor Vivid Video, I had to add it to IMDb today, some 20 years after release.

The hype on the box cover is just that, pure hype. Far from a tough-as-nails biker riding all over Texas, Vivid star Taylor Hayes never escapes from the studio. Two familiar faces relate her story as if it were legendary: Anthony Crane and Frank Bukkwyd, both aiming for laughs that never come.

She does have a poorly directed fight in a diner where she supposedly beats everybody up, but otherwise Taylor is quite placid and uninteresting in her roles, playing not only the biker (who's never actually on her bike) but her mother (wearing a wig).

Very poor structure for a vignette movie has Cheyne Collins humping the mother Taylor and in the next scene humping the daughter Taylor, making for repetitive sex footage that is hardly flattering to the star. Other femme players including Brit beauty Bobbi Harrington who humps Marty Romano in the movie's first flashback and Cheyenne in a truly nothing role as a cop who tries to arrest Taylor, but has a threesome with her and fellow cop Dale DaBone instead.

The most mindless scene here involves the fate of Taylor's mother (Taylor again), you won't believe how stupid it is.
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