(2010 Video)

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She's no porn star and definitely no prophet
lor_14 December 2015
In the interview bonus on the DVD misleadingly titled "The Confession" (which it isn't), Amy Fisher expresses her enthusiasm for the Adult Entertainment field on the occasion of shooting her first XXX video, and projects a long and fruitful career doing the same. Alas, after 3 DreamZone Entertainment quickies, a very fine Nica Noelle follow-up feature ("Fatal Seduction") and a kiss-off Naughty America vignette, she made a hasty exit back to NYC.

This all takes place nearly two decades after her brush with fame as the tabloids' Long Island Lolita involved in a local sex scandal. By the time she is getting ready here, in the summer of 2010, for her first DeMille XXX close-up, Amy has all the accoutrements of a porn actress: beautiful big new fake breasts, industrial strength false eyelashes, a neatly shaved vagina, attractive face and figure, pleasant personality, and prowess in the f & s departments. Despite her enthusiastic prognostications about acting in high-grade erotic videos, she quickly found out this is as competitive a business as mainstream Hollywood, well almost.

Before ripping into this video, I need to state that I thought her Nica Noelle Sweet Sinner feature was great and that Amy was terrifically sexy in it. That, however is merely one man's opinion, and certainly she didn't get lucrative offers after it was released 4 years ago.

This first of three "outdoor sex" wall-to-wallers directed by Jim Enright spotlights Amy's prowess humping and little else. Audiences don't give a hoot about scenery, and the sex scenes are MOS, with or without boring Muzak tracks and just dull and repetitive. At no point does Amy impress as outstanding in some department, in contrast to thousands of X-rated starlets who have come and gone over the past 40 or so years. How many times have you watched a porn movie (later a video) and been impressed with some unsung young thing given a shot, maybe just a one-shot, at a sort of screen immortality. To me it was always more fun to do just that, rather than sit through the 20th or 30th carbon copy appearance of some overrated superstar like Seka or Serena.

So Enright has us watch Amy hump Tommy Gunn, Dale DaBone and Marcus London (who she damns with faint praise in complimenting him on his performance even though "he doesn't have a big dick"). Her lesbian match-up with Lisa Ann is perfunctory, mechanical sex in which L.A. is as proficient as ever, but it's merely one of a thousand or so Lisa Ann scenes. Lame quality control has her spelled Lisa Anne in the opening credits.
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