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phanatic1989
Reviews
The Jungle Book (2016)
Reall Not What I Was Hoping For
I was imagining this would be a movie on par with Disney's Maleficent. Something visually stunning, with good writing, acting, and maybe a little bit of cheese and humor. The Jungle Book, however, was a major disappointment. Yes, it was indeed visually amazing. CGI has come a long way, and the facial expressions of the animals (especially King Kong Christopher Walken) were outstanding. The voice acting by the all-star cast was top notch as well. That is where the good parts end.
This movie would be ideal for children ages 12 and under, or a parents taking their kids to see the movie. For anybody older than that, this movie has little to offer (other than what is mentioned above). I understand the child playing Mogli is young, I get it, but his acting at times is painful. I mean 90s Goosebump episodes painful. The writing, equally so (i.e. goofy recitation about the law of the jungle repeated multiple times throughout the movie). Tedious action/chase scenes with serious thematic music sprinkled throughout, followed by equally tedious conversations with the ever annoying Mogli. It's like they couldn't find the balance between goofy kids movie and remastered epic. So what they end up with is simply a goofy mess. And it's okay if it's a goofy movie, I freakin loved The Mummy and am entertained every Halloween by the ever silly cheesefest, Van Helsing. But this....just felt like a goofy movie that tried to take itself too seriously.
This is a Red Boxer for a babysitter or a parent...or anybody who really really likes seeing super cool CGI animals.
Snow White and the Huntsman (2012)
Beautifully Epic!
I went into this movie with not expecting anything more than the average pretty good summer movie. My hopes were exceeded a thousand times over. This is a brilliant retelling of the classic story, with a nod at the darker somber sides of the original fairy tales. That being said THIS IS NOT YOUR USUAL Cliché FAIRY TALE CHICK FLICK. There is hardly any romance in it whatsoever, which makes it all the better of a movie.
Now for the things that I liked. The casting was excellent. While I am one of the many that can't stand what I've seen from the Twilight movies, my hat is off to Kristen Stewart. Despite what other stubborn critics are saying, I think she did well and is on her way to breaking out of her "Bella mold". Charlize Theron was PERFECT, period. And I'm not usually one to rant about art, but this movie was utterly beautiful. It took the usual fantasy motifs such as fairies, trolls, dark forests, evil monarchs, and portrayed them in ways that were utterly unique and different than what has been seen in the genre before. And finally the costuming alone was amazing. The action sequences were just long and brutal enough to be enjoyable, not used as filler like in most movies.
Summary: If you're looking for an exciting and different (though somewhat gloomy) fairy tale this is the movie for you. And yes having two very hot male actors in it ain't bad either ;)
Grave Encounters (2011)
Absolutely Loved This Movie!
OK to save us all some time I will start with why you wouldn't like this movie. You would NOT like this movie if you are the kind of person who is looking for something "new." Most of the reviews from people who did not like this movie complained about it using stuff from other movies. May I remind everybody that the horror genre has been around for quite awhile and nearly every new movie has something an older movie has used at some point. The fact that it may seem cliché to some does not make it any less scary. A person doesn't get off a roller coaster and say "wow that was lame! It went just as fast and crazy as that other roller coaster!" The point is while the movie may use "common scare tactics", I still found it very suspenseful. If you are looking for a horror movie with believable acting, a freak show style exhibit of horrors, and a "OMG here it comes" feel, then I definitely recommend this movie. But if you are the kind of viewer who would rather criticize than sit back and be entertained, I suggest you stay home and see if you can come up with a genuinely "new" horror story.
Shutter Island (2010)
Pretty good, but a little disappointing
I'll start with the good first. Overall this movie was very clever. The storyline and plot were intriguing and it definitely plays with your mind. The beginning was very moving, the acting phenomenal, and the end left little room for loopholes as it brought full circle everything that happened throughout the movie. HOWEVER, the middle of the movie, the largest part, was a bit slow. The excessive use of dream sequences was particularly tedious. Perhaps I was disappointed because the movie was advertised as a horror film, when it really is more of a drama. I wouldn't even say it's a thriller, as most scenes are not really "scary" but more disturbing. Finally, what most likely will determine how you feel about this movie is whether you figure out the end about 20 minutes into the movie. I'm not one of those egotistical morons who go to movies so they can try and figure out the end before everybody else, but I had a pretty good notion of where this movie was going early on. So as a word of caution if you are used to reading stories from old horror masters like H.P Lovecraft or are an Alfred Hitchcock enthusiast this movie is going to be pretty obvious to you. All in all I would recommend this movie, but I did not find it as amazing as everybody else.
Inglourious Basterds (2009)
Grossly Hypocritical
I went to see the movie because my boyfriend was raving about how much he wanted to see it, and how his friends had already been and loved it. So I came in with a neutral attitude, not really expecting the worst. Unfortunately, that is what I got. I could write a 15 page paper on why this is easily THE WORST movie I have ever seen. But for your benefit I will point out the pros and the endless supply of cons. To begin, the acting was very good, especially Christopher Waltz and Melanie Laurent. There were also a few lines that deserved a laugh, and a couple suspenseful scenes. Sadly, good acting, a little humor and suspense is where the good points end. The whole beginning story could have been great. A Jewish girl's family is butchered, she goes into hiding, later encounters the man responsible for her pain and then hatches a great plan for revenge. Sounds very good. But the movie wouldn't be quite as "satisfying" for the Americans and Jews craving Nazi blood. I have no problem with WWII movies or killing Nazis; I saw Defiance and like it very much. However, it's the way and attitude with which our would-be heroes kill. I'll give you a prime example of the kind of hypocrisy this movie oozes. Our hoodlum gang ambushes a German unit and kills/scalps all of them except a sergeant and two other soldiers (no problem so far). They ask the sergeant to divulge information on another German unit. When he "respectfully refuses" to betray the lives of his fellow soldiers they bash his head in a with a baseball bat, cheering, and swearing as if they were at a football game. They took that Nazi's head off yaaayy! Now let's look at the hypocrisy in that scene. Here's a hypothetical situation: a group of American soldiers are ambushed and taken captive by the enemy. The same scenario follows and the American commanding officer would rather die than betray his fellow soldier. The enemy bashes his head in with much celebration. This would infuriate an audience if this scene were in a movie. That American soldier was a hero for placing his men above himself, and those barbarians brutally murdered him! Well
what about the Nazi sergeant? Well he's a Nazi and deserves to die the cruelest death possible, right? Coincidentally, the Nazi's felt the same towards the Jews. See the hypocrisy? By celebrating the butcher of the Nazis we are placing ourselves on the same sadistic level.
Major hypocrisy #2: The Nazis make a propaganda movie about a German sniper who kills nearly 300 American soldiers. Near the end of the movie, the film is revealed. Hitler and his cohorts giggle with delight as they watch an American soldier get shot out of a window and fall into a fountain. The Nazis cheer as soldier after soldier falls to the snipers skill. This is supposed to enrage the American viewers of this scene. Those evil Nazis are laughing over the deaths of our brave men! Well the irony is, isn't that what we were doing (or supposed to be doing) the entire time we're watching Inglorious Basterds? Laughing over the pain of others simply because they were "the bad guys." How would we feel if Native Americans somehow made a hit film in which they reek bloody vengeance on the American settlers? Or what if blacks made a movie glorifying the Nat Turner Rebellion? OK enough about the hypocritical flaws.
I'll summarize other reasons for the 1 star rating. 1) There were view admirable characters throughout the movie. Brad Pitt even tortures a woman by sticking his finger in her gunshot wound because he suspects she betrayed him. He's the good guy? 2) Scenes dragged on way longer than they needed to. 3) Brad Pitt's southern, supposedly Tennessee accent is HORRIBLE and thoroughly annoying throughout the entire move. I'll quit now since I'm at 700 words.
Unfortunately it seems that the general population doesn't think anymore, they just want blood. And that is why this movie received such a high ranking. I recommend this movie for the ignorant or if you are Jewish and simply wanting to see a nice "fantasy justice." Personally, when I finally got out of the movie theater I felt like I had been scalped (or wish that I had so I wouldn't have suffered over 2 hours of mental rape).