4/10
Not loved by me.
30 May 2011
Warning: Spoilers
The Loved Ones is set in Australia & starts as the attractive Lola (Robin McLeavy) ask's high school hunk Brent (Xavier Samuel) if he will accompany her to the upcoming school Prom, he politely declines saying he already has a date. On the afternoon of the Prom Brent has one of his suicidal mood swings & climbs halfway up a mountain in order to fall & kill himself but he chickens out & makes it to the top where Lola's father (John Brumpton) is waiting for him, he drugs Brent & kidnaps him taking him home to Lola & the macabre, twisted Prom at their house. Brent is tortured as Lola gets what she wants, will Brent be found & rescued in time or will Lola have her way with him?

This Australian production was written & directed by Sean Byrne & from some of the comments & reviews on the web you would have thought The Loved Ones was the best horror film of the past ten year's, well I can tell you that it's not & although it isn't too bad I suppose I am struggling to see where all the love for it comes from. The Loved Ones felt to me like a jumbled mix of ideas & scenes from other films, there's kidnapping, a bit of torture, a mad family living in the outback & a desperate attempt by the leading man to stay alive & escape the insanity. The Loved Ones is actually quite predictable in the sense that it never tries to do anything particularly surprising, I am quite surprised at how straight forward & basic The Loved Ones was. There's a pointless subplot about Brent's mate going to the Prom but the two story lines never cross & it feels like padding, at only 80 odd minutes long at least it's short & it moves along at a decent pace but I was never drawn into it, I was never captivated or surprised or shocked & while The Loved Ones is a watchable horror thriller I would struggle to call it anything better. The Loved Ones felt to me like a film with no point, what was the point of the subplot with Brent's friend? What was the point of what Lola was doing? Seriously, why was she doing it? Why had she done it before? It just made no sense to me at all & I couldn't relate to it on any realistic level at all. Like I said, as a decent enough horror thriller The Loved Ones is watchable enough but I doubt I would ever want to see it again & I would really struggle to recommend it other than as a time-waster. Apparently described by director Byrne as Carrie (1976) meets The Evil Dead (1981) which is fair enough although The Loved Ones is nowhere near as good as either of the two aforementioned films as far as I am concerned.

The Loved Ones is shot in such a way that there is actually very little on screen gore or graphic violence shown, there's a bit where someone gets a drill in their forehead without the camera ever actually showing it, someone is seen cut, there are brief shots of nails being hammered into a foot, someone is stabbed in the neck & there's a fair amount of blood splatter but overall very little is shown. There's a rather random twist reveal about an hour in as it appears Lola & her father keep a basement full of cannibalistic teenage boys who have had their brains boiled. As you do, obviously. Very well made with none of that horrible shaky hand-held camera-work crap or machine gun editing that I hate so much The Loved Ones is actually a very nice film to look at if not exactly the genre busting classic that I was led to believe.

I also keep seeing it said that The Loved Ones was low budget, well how do they know? I am not saying it wasn't but there are already plenty of great low budget films out there & I suspect that The Loved Ones had a bigger budget than many horror films. Filmed in Melbourne in Australia. The acting is very good, I can't say I liked anyone or rooted for anyone or became involved with any of the character's but everyone put in fine performances.

The Loved Ones was a disappointment to me, with such a big build up I expected more. For me The Loved Ones is just a mixture of ideas, themes & moments from other films. It's fairly predictable with no great depth & shy's away from showing any graphic violence or gore. It's watchable if there's nothing on telly or your desperate but far from the classic many other's keep saying it is.
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