USS Seaviper (2012) User Reviews

One to miss at all costs.

[niall-piercy · 1/10 · 3 June 2012]

I created an account to provide a review of this film as it is so awful. I paid to see it as it was rated 7.3/10 on IMDb. I don't know how this film achieved this score unless all the other reviewers were part of the film itself!

The acting is terrible. The direction is terrible. The script is terrible.

If a group of 11 year old children decided to make a film, had a camera, wrote a script, then got some money for some special effects (around say $23), then this would be the result.

This is the worst film I have ever seen. It may in fact be the worst film that has ever been made in all of human history.

Talk about a sinking sub. This movie is Bad

[clockwise2000 · 1/10 · 25 June 2012]

I have watched this movie, and agreed with all the posts on here that tell you this movie is rubbish. The posts that have rated it a ten ( ARE YOU SERIOUS ) or must have family in the movie or worked on it because there is no way in the world that anyone would rate this a ten, unless you have never see a movie or Television before .

The acting and script is just SO bad, and in the end you ask yourself....really what in the hell was this movie all about. If this was the last movie on earth I would not watch it again, I really wished I had not seen it the first time. There are parts of this movie that are just so badly stupid, and I have to ask myself the question HOW in the hell did they get the money to make this trash.

However in 700 years from now this may become a cult film of bad films. If anyone that worked on the film just a tip I would not put this one on the CV.

Save your time, you only live once and you don't want to waste your 1hr . 42mins of your life watching this pile of rubbish. So sad to see this movie stink and sink. It could have been a really good movie if they had actors that could acted, and a editor that did not leave such a big hole between lines.

A BIG SINKING MESS...WARNING WARING go watch a rerun of Mash you will be better off. I would love to give this a minus 150

The worst film ever.

[strawbuckie · 1/10 · 14 July 2012]

I really learned a lesson by buying this film on DVD; never, ever buy a film that has no recommendations or star ratings in the cover. This film has nothing going for it. From the outset everything is wrong; the lighting, the acting, the script, the direction..everything! The lighting has just one level. The script is wooden. The actors reminded me of the 70's series "The Love Boat", it's truly dreadful. I agree with earlier reviews which suggest that the 10 star reviews must have been left by reviewers associated with the film. USS Seaviper is barely deserving of one star. If this film were a restaurant it would be closed down by the health dept.. it really stinks. I absolutely adore films about subs, however this one should sink without trace. I'll go back to K19 and Crimson Tide.

Categorically the WORST submarine movie EVER made!

[twidgetbubblehead · 1/10 · 2 June 2013]

This movie is so far below awful, it defies description. I thought that U-571 was the worst, but, compared to this, U-571 rates a very strong 10.

Let's start with the German side of the picture, shall we? The movie starts somewhere in the vicinity of Kiel, in Shleswig-Holstein. The German being spoken and written is Bavarian German. The two dialects are about as far apart as the Deep South and Bostonian English. They can't be further apart if they tried and, usually, cannot be understood by each other. That pretty much ends the German involvement in the film.

The C-47 has a bomb sight (?!). The pilot and co-pilot are flying without benefit of headsets. The co-pilot has a bullet hole in his forehead while he struggles with an inept Japanese soldier trying to bayonet him in the throat. The Japanese soldier survives being shot. The pilot knows how to repair radios. Does the stupidity of this movie ever end?

The remainder of the film centers around a small handful of American sailors. We see officers, both flag rank and commanding officers, wearing neatly groomed beards, something never done during WWII. We see one officer playing poker with the Chief and other enlisted and losing his shirt in the process. Uh, officers fraternizing with enlisted? And this officer is referred to as only "Officer" Cutter. What kind? What rank? For that matter, no one else wears any insignia of rank other than the admiral and Executive Officer Roitman. And he's wearing the insignia of an ENSIGN, the lowest officer rank. The Chief (why aren't there other Chiefs on board?) regularly pops off at officers and even slugs one. He's also under foot during Battle Stations Torpedo instead of being Diving Officer, as would normally be the case. The Captain goes ashore AND STAYS THERE! The rubber "raft" has a rigid hull.

The periscope goes up and down much too slowly. This is not a good thing. The feather attracts attention. The "destroyers" look much more like corvettes. The exterior shots of the hull show rivets, not a welded hull. Torpedoes come out of the same tube or the wrong tube. The Pharmacist's Mate, a pill pusher, performs an amputation -- shall we go on? The crowning touch to this farce of a movie is when the boat is at 350'. The fans are off, rigged for quiet, and the crew is up and about carrying on as if nothing wrong was happening. They should have been in their racks, stripped to the waist and drenched in sweat.

One more thing -- US submarines of that era were named after denizens of the deep, not some made-up mythical creature.

If I were still on the boats, I would consign this piece of dreck to the TDU and drop it to the ocean floor.

Really??

[HEIDIBOO · 1/10 · 21 September 2012]

I've never written a review on here before but this movie is so bad I felt the need. Bad script, bad acting, bad effects and not even a real attempt to be even slightly accurate. I mean, any war movie would at least make some remote effort to ensure the uniforms have rank on them. The WWII "Destroyer" is a launch circa 1970's. Where would POW's on Sumatra get cigarettes from? The English accent is appalling, sounding more like an Australian. A Sub Captain would never leave the boat. Its clear no real research was conducted to make this even appear to be authentic. I watched all of 10 mins before I couldn't stand it anymore. You can certainly tell this is low low low low budget. Shame really because the storyline made out it could have been good. I really cant give it more than a one star.

Poor excuse for a film

[jimmyhatfield60 · 1/10 · 9 June 2012]

I had high hopes going into this film, it is highly rated on IMDb and looked to be on an interesting subject. However I got hung up on all the little errors that are on every frame. Hands down the biggest complaint I would have is with the costumes. When the 'admiral' and 'captain' are speaking to each other, notice how clean their clothes are...like they have never been worn before 10 min ago when filming began. Also pay attention to the large numbers of medals the Admiral is wearing to denote his rank and any citations he may have been awarded in his career. When the characters are playing cards, it is obvious none of them know how to play, they use continuation bets.

Much of the effects seem to be added as an after thought, when the sub is preparing to dive some idiot throws a bucket of water down the hatch as it is closed, to signify the approaching ocean. Cut to the next scene and the sub is still 10 feet above the water preparing to dive, nice and dry. Also the actors should have been given an hour or two to practice moving on the ship hurriedly, like their lives depended on getting to that hatch before the ocean came into the sub! These actors would die so fast in war.

Seeing Is Believing

[simon-koranter · 1/10 · 12 June 2012]

This is what a movie would look like if it was done by a group of small children on a budget of say $24.99. The script is ridiculous, acting horrible, direction obviously got lost somewhere along the line and failed to show up at the shoot.

This is supposed to be an important story of WW2, but even after forcing myself to reach the end of this disgrace, I still have no idea what the big story is about. The only thing I found amusing is the (supposedly) British officer. He keeps breathing heavily (maybe a relative of the heavy breather in Student Bodies?), showing his pearly whites and nose hair, while his British accent is something he could've picked up in a cheap novelty shop.

Stay away from this one. Or better yet, check it out and see for yourselves. Watching such trollop makes you appreciate quality cinema more. And that has to count for something, right?

I've seen better film on teeth

[icken-oodle-noup · 2/10 · 20 July 2012]

What do you get when you mix a beta cam recorder, a Sony "My First Editor", and a crew of inept and talentless hacks? A film that is far superior to this horrid attempt at a movie. The cameraman should be barred from handling anything that can capture an image. The first ratings were, without a doubt, posted by the same inferior morons who created this heap. DO NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, SEE THIS FILM. Compared to this, Gigli deserves an Oscar. I would rather sit through a midnight showing of Batman in Colorado than watch this piece of shite again. I'm giving it two stars out of sympathy, and the lack of negative stars on IMDb.

The only place this movie deserves to be is at the bottom of the ocean!

[TheLittleSongbird · 1/10 · 4 June 2013]

Usually I am encouraging with my comments and ratings, but Sea Viper really is that bad a movie. I cannot find a single redeeming feature about it, which I've had said of very few movies I've seen this year. Visually, Sea Viper is very amateurish, everything is all over the place that gives an impression that the director and the editor had absolutely no idea how to do so, and sometimes what we see on screen is close to incoherent. And I do agree that the uniforms and such looked far too clean, and that the lighting was too one-note. The sound quality is murky and the soundtrack is monotonous to the extent that it and the sound combined are a constant drone drowning almost everything out. Not enough however to drown out the utter banality that is the dialogue, and you can tell that the actors were struggling delivering it. The acting is awful, they look bored out of their skulls(their line delivery completely betrays that notion), they're wooden and they look as if they have as much life as marionettes(and that in itself is an insult to marionettes). Their characters are severely underwritten stereotypes, with absolutely no chemistry between them. The story, last but not least, is practically a non-event, what there is of one is plodding, has no tension or suspense of the kind and it doesn't make a remote bit of sense. There are even scenes that seem lifted out of films like Crimson Tide, and the probability of Sea Viper being anywhere near as intelligently written or suspenseful as that is at a big fat zero and even down in the minuses. To conclude, a dreadful movie that really does sink to the lowest common denominator and the only place it should be is as far as it can go at the bottom of the ocean never to be seen again. 0/10 Bethany Cox

Big flop

[bk287909 · 1/10 · 11 June 2012]

No real scenario. Very bad acting. Low cost special effects.

Same Japanese destroyer exploding scene used three times with different angles.

Unskilled doctor trying to look after a rescued guy during 15 minutes.

It is a total mess.

How did they manage to distribute such a piece of bad taste.

If you want to see some good movies with subs and real action, try these ones : Red October, U-571, the Widow , the Boat, Run Silent - Run Deep. There are also great old movies in black and white.

In brief, to avoid.

Utterly unwatchable

[djvaast · 6 March 2022]

I thought I would have this movie playing in the background while editing photos as something to make noise so I wasn't expecting much. But it was even worse than that. Beware and avoid at all costs. Acting terrible. Script written by illiterates. Music ham-fisted. Really really terrible. Go fold laundry or watch paint dry for your entertainment instead of this movie.

eye of the beholder

[jalcon1 · 10/10 · 19 June 2012]

Beauty is in the eye of the beholder,a famous quote said"You can please some of the people some of the time,but you can't please all of the people all of the time" case and point,you must see this film for yourself,then and only then you can make your own judgment,on the A+ production value,that it offers,the acting was superb,given the fact that you have a cast of unknowns,but nevertheless,achieved an understanding of the unity that made the submariners a very unique group of warriors,coupled with a strong story line,and visionary directing as well as cinematography,this movie when it gets released,is a must see.

Interesting Indie Film

[misc11236 · 6/10 · 21 May 2013]

WARNING: I have a family member in the cast, my son David plays "Grease" Cohen.

That said, I grew up on World War 2 submarine movies and USS Seaviper has an interesting twist on Germany and Japan's interest on developing nuclear weapons.

The important thing to keep in mind is that this is an indie movie and doesn't star Clark Gable, Burt Lancaster, Glenn Ford, or Cary Grant as the captain . . . nor were millions of dollars spent on the production. It is in that context that I gave the movie 6 stars.

As for the nasty reviews, they need to be taken with a grain of salt, as they seem to be a deliberate attack on the director, Ralph Villani. For example, there was one reviewer who talked about paying to see the movie - never happened as it was not released in theaters. As for the more cogent critical reviews, some of them are on target - this is not a Hollywood film. However, it has earned awards and positive reviews at various indie film festivals.

I am not here to critique the film or praise my son's performance (although I did enjoy it), but rather to suggest you make up your own mind.

Read a book instead

[schaffer1969-339-908056 · 1/10 · 6 July 2012]

So this is second time around to write a review for this movie as my last one got removed for some unknown reason.

I'm an avid fan of most war movies especially WWII so I looked forward to watching this movie one evening. The IMDb review had given it 7.1 out of 10 so I thought this must be good. It is now reflects a lowly 2.1, which in my opinion is still too high, and probably due to the handful of 10/10 reviews that some people are making. Maybe they are related to the cast or crew or just like punishing themselves.

However, as soon as the first scene came on it became apparent that all was not quite right. It's one of those feelings that you get when you know something is not quite right but you can't put your finger on it straight away. The acting just did not feel correct. The production and direction was straight out of the dummy's guide on how to make a movie. The script was stilted in many places and the actors looked like they had just stepped out of the shower, donned their neatly ironed shirts and trimmed their beards.

The further in it went the special effects and sets just seemed cheap. The characters were like cardboard cut-outs, one dimensional and very stiff. The Germans are portrayed as stereotypical evil Nazis with no humanity and the Americans are the good guys who can do no wrong.

This ranks as one of the worst movies I have seen in a long time. It was so bad that I had to give up watching during the movie. Life is way too short to waste it watching any of this movie. Read a book instead.

Swim away from this one as fast as you can!

[diamonddave713 · 1/10 · 20 June 2012]

I spent the time to reactivate my IMDb account just to write this review because the 7.3 rating is a joke, A very bad joke on us. The trailer looked like this would be worth watching but wow was I wrong! The other reviewers are spot on with their ratings of 1 or 2 stars. The acting, script and direction is absolutely the worst worst worst i've ever seen! I love a good or even half decent submarine movie but this one stunk to badly to watch, The script and acting is so horrible it was beyond belief. I shut it off about 30 minutes or so in to it. No way on earth is this movie better than a 2/10 But don't believe me, Look at the other reviews and be forewarned. Apparently my review was flagged for abuse for saying how bad the acting was in the movie, Isn't reporting bad acting part of a movie review if indeed their was bad acting? I'll leave it at that.

Did Not Deliver the Goods

[hgasnier · 3/10 · 29 May 2012]

This movie just did not deliver. The acting started off poor and I thought it must get better as the movie plodded along. No it didn't. Some of the CGI worked where others didn't and we kept getting the same old cutaway shot thrown in for good measure. 'Das Boot' it is not. As previously mentioned, I had a problem with some cutaways. The card game was poorly done and the watch in question looked like it came from a dollar store, not the antique it was supposed to be. The lighting was all over the place throughout the movie and sound was bad in places. The supposed German home port looked like it was filmed in a back yard and I can only presume that German soldiers, and Americans at the end of the film, were re enacters who supplied their own vehicles and uniforms. The movie was supposed to be about the Uranium on the German sub but very little was made of this and how they managed to take it from the Germans. Michael Jaques English accent just grated. Just because you throw in a few 'cockney' words,it did not make him English and it did not do his part any favours. He should have been left with his native accent. Why do directors have to have a part in their own movie? Well ask Villani that one. For me that's when I knew I was in for a rough ride. Inexperience from most of the cast, shone like a beacon. In the shack, the radio operator seemed to be having some kind of joke all by himself, his smirking performance in a theatre of war made me rewind to see if I had missed something. I could go on, and what I have said might be a bit harsh, but just because you can can get a bunch of people to stump up cash and hire in a Red to make a movie, people have to watch it and care and quite frankly I didn't.

Horrible Mess

[William_Henry_Pratt · 1/10 · 18 April 2013]

I originally thought this film was made by a bunch of 18 year old's at their parents beach home during the summer. It turns out the director is in his sixties! It looks like he got all of his 'extra' friends and made a 'film' if I can call it that. The acting is so amateurish they should have stayed extras and take an acting class or two. All the actors hair are blown dry, in the forties! The ridiculously banal script is by someone who did absolutely no research about the period or subject matter and looks like she never even met a human being. Characters talk endlessly about nothing to each other or telegraph the narrative in the worst way. The first rule of movie making is not to move narrative through dialogue. I don't think the writer ever studied any of the elements of writing and she plagiarizes a lot of other sources. This mess looks like something you'd see on YouTube. The D.P. knows absolutely nothing about lighting…ah I could go on but ultimately just because someone goes out and buys a Canon 5D doesn't mean you have to go out and make a motion picture. Everyone involved with this catastrophe should find another line of work.

Crap.

Disappointment first class

[TomvanWoerkom · 3/10 · 12 June 2012]

I thought there was finally an new upcoming submarine movie after a while when I saw him on IMDb, but afterwards when I watched it, it was seriously one big disappointment. I couldn't follow the story at all. The story was not clear and I have no idea why there was a fight between the Chief and Cutter (At least not the cause). Bad acting as well and I've seen some great movies who achieved a nice movie with an much lower budget. I wouldn't recommend you guys to watch it. It's not worth to pay for it. Waste of money. I seriously hope there is someone who's still able to overclass 'Das Boot'. Das Boot is seriously an masterpiece. Director disappointed me

America wins the war (again)

[eddie-barbour-449-491032 · 1/10 · 14 August 2012]

having watched this movie, but thankfully someone else paid What can I say one of the worst movies it has ever been my misfortune to see. Stereotypical Germans ,clean cut all American boys and a British officer played by god knows who with a accent supplied by the Hollywood accent shop who had obviously run out of British accents but managed to sell him this one instead.I notice that one of the other reviews suggested the picture had a budget of I think $23. A gross overestimate i would say but hey maybe that includes a tip for the pizza delivery boy who brought lunch to the set. As to the scores out of ten given on this site it could be as someone suggested that they were given by people who worked or acted in the film or could it be that they have watched a different movie and just got mixed up when awarding scores

Complete and utter tripe.

[charles-934-891149 · 1/10 · 12 April 2014]

There really should be a 0 out of 10 for films like this. I am presuming that this was a real life "The Producers" and made awful for tax reasons. The difference being that they really have made a flop.

The worst, most hollow and wooden acting (if that is what one can call it) I have seen in years. A high school play has better acting. The special effects are risible and in all honesty, it would have been better to not even attempt any as clearly making a model submarine look realistic is far beyond the capabilities of whoever attempted it.

Sometimes a film can be so bad that it has a certain attraction. But this film had no redeeming features and I couldn't endure all of it, and like others have said, those that have rated it highly must be associated in someway with the film.

Don't waste your time

[uf-401-259214 · 1/10 · 19 June 2012]

This would have to be the worst movie I have ever seen. You are better off spending 102 minutes looking at the movie poster, you would get more enjoyment out of it. This movie has bad everything, actors, script, direction you name it. I would not give this movie a B grade rating. it's worse. So save your time and money and do not bother watching this movie. But if you want to see a movie that is worse than a b grade movie, this is the one to watch.

Now how this movie got some awards I have no idea, apart from the only reason and that would be, awards had to be given to some films and this one was simply the best of all the other rubbish...So I would hated to had seen the one that did not win....

Ps. I could only vote as far as a 1. pity there is no minus vote numbers. And one other thing one of the movie posters shows underwater mines. Well guess what you do not see one underwater mine in the whole movie. There are depth chargers and that's it. There are two other posts that rate this movie high Im sure they are the film makers. This movie is a total joke and do not waste you time at all.

Good American Navy Story

[sab9032 · 10/10 · 23 June 2012]

It is good to see a heart warming story about the United States Navy in WWII. The actors did a very good job portraying life on a submarine during World War II. The actors playing the officers had great conflicts that reflected very writing. The POWs were a very well placed side plot. Also the actors who played the POWs still a stellar acting job. Most films today have so much special effects and no story, this film has a great story and three distinct plots. I do not understand the negative reviews posted, maybe they just don't have the heart for a good story about the inner life that people live in war time. If you like a good war drama see this film.

It's only garbage

[josda2 · 1/10 · 4 November 2013]

The worst war movie I've seen, it is clear that the director has no idea how to make a war movie!, The performances are terrible, the list of errors are so extensive that denotes the null research on basic things as difference between a destroyer and a corvette, periscope image of a tanker ship is fail ; C47 with bombing view??,The ships that attack are not shown,

the dialogs are poor, immersion procedures are incorrect,The costumes of the film is incorrect; the sailors behave like Italian mobsters It's so disastrous and poor that I can't finish her. Just friends or fake users can give 10 stars to this movie! Qualify with 1 because I can't give 0 stars Don't waste your time viewing this piece of garbage

Beat

[ryan-410-26658 · 2/10 · 30 June 2012]

Yea it's so beat the medical officer can't do his job the man is crying like a baby real sailors don't cry when their scared the movie really is a joke it just cuts from scene to scene with no transition.. It's a bad movie. The bad reviews are dead on its horrible they do not act like sailors they act like baby's wow thank god our country is not protected by fools like that lol one review said how clean they always are i agree it's a joke deisal subs are dirty sweaty places they look like models. The actors are horrible You. Can. Tell its a budget movie big time don't waste your time downloading the torrent its crap crap crap

Did They do Any Research At All?

[rjsguitar · 1/10 · 1 April 2022]

This movie was an example of how to ruin a good idea with poor attention to the details of the story. This is supposed to be a WWII submarine flick. No sub captain would have been on the surface in daylight anywhere near a Japanese island. The way the periscope went up and down during a submerged attack would have gotten a sub killed.

Going ashore on an enemy island in daylight? No. Unguarded POWs? No. This movie approaches Plan 9 from Outer Space for it's lack of continuity.

Using a C47 for Recon? Are you serious?

"President Roosevelt directly gave me an order" No, he didn't, the admiral did. Did the director and producer actually watch this film when they finished it? To the bilge with you!