30 Rock (TV Series)
Into the Crevasse (2009)
Alec Baldwin: Jack Donaghy
Photos
Quotes
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Devon Banks : You know, revenge is a dish best served cold, Jack. Like sashimi, or pizza.
Jack Donaghy : You prefer cold pizza?
Devon Banks : The morning after? It's the best.
Jack Donaghy : Better than hot pizza? That's insane.
Devon Banks : You don't tell me what kind of pizza to like!
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Liz Lemon : I wanted to give you a copy of my book. They used your blurb.
Jack Donaghy : [reads from the back cover] "Lemon numbers among my employees."
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Devon Banks : [questioning Jack at government committee] Is it true, Mr. Donaghy, that your executives routinely used company helicopters to dry their home tennis courts?
Jack Donaghy : Yes and no. Yes, that did happen. No, it didn't not happen.
Devon Banks : And that G.E. kept a party clown on retainer with a six-figure salary?
Jack Donaghy : When Silly Willy's fee was amortized over all birthdays company-wide...
Devon Banks : I'm being told the company money is being gambled at racetracks.
Jack Donaghy : Yes, but I have a system.
Devon Banks : In 2007, a G.E. officer used corporate funds to throw a "Cabaret" themed Halloween party on Fire Island.
Jack Donaghy : As I recall, that was you.
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Jack Donaghy : You'd ruin an entire company just to get to me? Think of the employees, the pensions, the kittens we use to test the strength of our microwaves.
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Jack Donaghy : Lemon, let me tell you a little story. It was 1994, and I was ice climbing when I fell into a crevasse and hurt my leg. There was only one way out, so fighting every natural instinct I have, I did the thing I hated the most. I climbed down into the darkness. And when I came back to camp, I went to the person who cut my line and said, "Connie Chung, you saved my life."
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Jack Donaghy : The automotive company was ran by white morons who were out of touch with America. We're G.E., dammit. We're making a giant, shoddy microwave.
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Liz Lemon : What a week, huh?
Jack Donaghy : Lemon, it's Wednesday.