Some of the worse films i've seen!

by doglover000000 | created - 01 Jan 2013 | updated - 01 Jan 2013 | Public

My reviews of some unenjoyable films!

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1. Jennifer's Body (2009)

R | 102 min | Comedy, Horror

47 Metascore

A newly-possessed high-school cheerleader turns into a succubus who specializes in killing her male classmates. Can her best friend put an end to the horror?

Director: Karyn Kusama | Stars: Megan Fox, Amanda Seyfried, Adam Brody, Johnny Simmons

Votes: 151,392 | Gross: $16.20M

If your eyes are connected to you brain, then your'll give this one a miss!

25/8/2012

2. Dead Ringers (1988)

R | 116 min | Drama, Horror, Thriller

86 Metascore

Twin gynecologists take full advantage of the fact that nobody can tell them apart, until their relationship begins to deteriorate over a woman.

Director: David Cronenberg | Stars: Jeremy Irons, Geneviève Bujold, Heidi von Palleske, Barbara Gordon

Votes: 53,613 | Gross: $9.13M

Maybe i'm just too dense to understand the subplot or the psychological aspect of the film, but the slow pace and the tame "horror" left a bitter taste.

2/9/2012

3. Ice Age: Continental Drift (2012)

PG | 88 min | Animation, Adventure, Comedy

49 Metascore

Manny, Diego, and Sid embark upon another adventure after their continent is set adrift. Using an iceberg as a ship, they encounter sea creatures and battle pirates as they explore a new world.

Directors: Steve Martino, Michael Thurmeier | Stars: Ray Romano, Denis Leary, John Leguizamo, Aziz Ansari

Votes: 225,039 | Gross: $161.32M

An exhausted fourth installment of the Ice Age franchise. With good bits sparse and far apart, its just a typical childrens animation that hasn't lived up to the very first one!

22/12/2012

4. Men in Black³ (2012)

PG-13 | 106 min | Action, Adventure, Comedy

58 Metascore

Agent J travels in time to M.I.B.'s early days in 1969 to stop an alien from assassinating his friend Agent K and changing history.

Director: Barry Sonnenfeld | Stars: Will Smith, Tommy Lee Jones, Josh Brolin, Jemaine Clement

Votes: 387,234 | Gross: $179.02M

The comedy is sparse, the plot recycled and the sentimentality at the end was pointless. The chemistry between Smith and Brolin is fresh and works well but not entertaining or inventive enough to carry the film to the end!

23/11/2012

5. Seven Psychopaths (2012)

R | 110 min | Comedy, Crime

66 Metascore

A struggling screenwriter inadvertently becomes entangled in the Los Angeles criminal underworld after his oddball friends kidnap a gangster's beloved Shih Tzu.

Director: Martin McDonagh | Stars: Colin Farrell, Woody Harrelson, Sam Rockwell, Christopher Walken

Votes: 274,020 | Gross: $15.02M

Tarantino rip off. Self indulgent and non sequitur! Good cast but disappointing finally.

7/12/2012

6. Paranormal Activity 4 (2012)

R | 88 min | Horror, Mystery

40 Metascore

It has been five years since the disappearance of Katie and Hunter, and a suburban family witness strange events in their neighborhood when a woman and a mysterious child move in.

Directors: Henry Joost, Ariel Schulman | Stars: Stephen Dunham, Katie Featherston, Matt Shively, Brendon Eggertsen

Votes: 70,290 | Gross: $53.92M

Its a weak fourth installment with not much developing from the previous films. However, with an unexpected scene towards the end, its worth the watch if your a fan of the others.

18/10/2012

7. Taken 2 (2012)

PG-13 | 92 min | Action, Crime, Thriller

45 Metascore

In Istanbul, retired CIA operative Bryan Mills and his wife are taken hostage by the father of a kidnapper Mills killed while rescuing his daughter.

Director: Olivier Megaton | Stars: Liam Neeson, Famke Janssen, Maggie Grace, Leland Orser

Votes: 322,764 | Gross: $139.85M

Compared to its predecessor, it doesn't match up. An unnecessary sequel that was slightly saved by Liam Neeson.

11/10/2012

8. All the Boys Love Mandy Lane (2006)

R | 90 min | Horror, Mystery, Thriller

44 Metascore

A group of high-schoolers invite Mandy Lane, an innocent, desirable girl, to a weekend party on a secluded ranch. While the festivities rage on, the number of revelers begins to drop mysteriously.

Director: Jonathan Levine | Stars: Amber Heard, Anson Mount, Whitney Able, Michael Welch

Votes: 34,778

Wow! Who thought by putting a bunch of obnoxious, arrogant teens together would create a sympathetic audience. Clearly Levine is a little confused?! A boring slasher that doesn't stray far from your typical horror!

29/9/2012

9. The Sweeney (2012)

R | 112 min | Action, Crime, Drama

48 Metascore

A hardened detective in the Flying Squad of London's Metropolitan police. Based on the '70s UK TV show.

Director: Nick Love | Stars: Ray Winstone, Plan B, Hayley Atwell, Steven Mackintosh

Votes: 20,423 | Gross: $0.03M

An out of date remake of a TV series classic. The cast carries the film well but with every turn predicted its hardly worth the watch!

24/9/2012

10. Dredd (2012)

R | 95 min | Action, Crime, Sci-Fi

60 Metascore

In a violent, futuristic city where the police have the authority to act as judge, jury and executioner, a cop teams with a trainee to take down a gang that deals the reality-altering drug, SLO-MO.

Director: Pete Travis | Stars: Karl Urban, Olivia Thirlby, Lena Headey, Rachel Wood

Votes: 294,562 | Gross: $13.41M

Yet another CGI dependant thriller that throws out more bullets then facial expressions. A mindless pop-corn adaptation.

15/9/2012

11. The Dictator (2012)

R | 83 min | Comedy

58 Metascore

The heroic story of a dictator who risked his life to ensure that democracy would never come to the country he so lovingly oppressed.

Director: Larry Charles | Stars: Sacha Baron Cohen, Anna Faris, John C. Reilly, Ben Kingsley

Votes: 335,091 | Gross: $59.65M

Slow moving comedy that the easily offended should miss.

22/05/2012

12. Survival of the Dead (2009)

R | 90 min | Comedy, Drama, Horror

43 Metascore

On an island off the coast of North America, local residents simultaneously fight a zombie epidemic while hoping for a cure to return their un-dead relatives back to their human state.

Director: George A. Romero | Stars: Alan Van Sprang, Kenneth Welsh, Kathleen Munroe, Joshua Peace

Votes: 22,536 | Gross: $0.10M

Another zombie movie that hobbles through on its generic script and unnessary gore.

16/6/2012

13. Haywire (2011)

R | 93 min | Action, Drama, Thriller

67 Metascore

A black ops super soldier seeks payback after she is betrayed and set up during a mission.

Director: Steven Soderbergh | Stars: Gina Carano, Ewan McGregor, Michael Fassbender, Michael Angarano

Votes: 89,787 | Gross: $18.94M

A film that failed at the first hurdle to engage me. I tedious thriller with an awful lead!

20/05/2012

14. The Resident (2011)

R | 91 min | Crime, Drama, Horror

When a young doctor suspects she may not be alone in her new Brooklyn loft, she learns that her landlord has formed a frightening obsession with her.

Director: Antti J. Jokinen | Stars: Hilary Swank, Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Lee Pace, Christopher Lee

Votes: 29,632

Predictable thriller with two recognisable leads. Nothing original or suspenseful. A boring horror!

15. Hostel: Part III (2011 Video)

R | 88 min | Horror

Four men attending a bachelor party in Las Vegas fall prey to the Elite Hunting Club, who are hosting a gruesome game show of torture.

Director: Scott Spiegel | Stars: Kip Pardue, Brian Hallisay, John Hensley, Sarah Habel

Votes: 35,551

Any originality or cleverness that the first one brought to the genre is completely lost in this third installment like many other horror franchises.

10/6/2012

16. We Need to Talk About Kevin (2011)

R | 112 min | Drama, Mystery, Thriller

68 Metascore

Kevin's mother struggles to love her strange child despite the increasingly dangerous things he says and does as he grows up. But Kevin is just getting started, and his final act will be beyond anything anyone imagined.

Director: Lynne Ramsay | Stars: Tilda Swinton, John C. Reilly, Ezra Miller, Jasper Newell

Votes: 167,840 | Gross: $1.74M

Thought provoking and intense with an emotional and disturbing perfomance from both Swinton and Miller but slow pacing and patch work flashbacks bore me with arty farty editing.

10/6/2012

17. The Innkeepers (2011)

R | 101 min | Drama, Horror, Mystery

64 Metascore

During the final days at the Yankee Pedlar Inn, two employees determined to reveal the hotel's haunted past begin to experience disturbing events as old guests check in for a stay.

Director: Ti West | Stars: Sara Paxton, Pat Healy, Kelly McGillis, Alison Bartlett

Votes: 37,260 | Gross: $0.08M

A slow build up that fails to ignite at the end.

16/6/2012

18. Dream House (2011)

PG-13 | 92 min | Drama, Mystery, Thriller

35 Metascore

Soon after moving into their seemingly idyllic new home, a family learns of a brutal crime committed against former residents of the dwelling.

Director: Jim Sheridan | Stars: Daniel Craig, Rachel Weisz, Naomi Watts, Elias Koteas

Votes: 69,152 | Gross: $21.28M

A limp take on Shutter Island with less mystery and suspense. Predictable and disappointing even with the cast!

21/7/2012

19. Venus (I) (2006)

R | 95 min | Comedy, Drama, Romance

82 Metascore

Life for a pair of veteran actors gets turned upside down after they meet a brash teenager.

Director: Roger Michell | Stars: Peter O'Toole, Jodie Whittaker, Leslie Phillips, Beatrice Savoretti

Votes: 13,416 | Gross: $3.34M

A touching drama if a little odd. Thought provoking and sad yet mediocre and unoriginal.

16/9/2012

20. The Possession (I) (2012)

PG-13 | 92 min | Horror, Mystery, Thriller

45 Metascore

A young girl buys an antique box at a yard sale, unaware that inside the collectible lives a malicious ancient spirit. The girl's father teams with his ex-wife to find a way to end the curse upon their child.

Director: Ole Bornedal | Stars: Natasha Calis, Jeffrey Dean Morgan, Kyra Sedgwick, Madison Davenport

Votes: 63,240 | Gross: $49.13M

With hints of Paranormal Activity and The Exorcism inspiring this film, it started of promising but quickly diminishes into a bland, over recycled, generic horror! Shockingly though, the performances weren't half bad!

3/9/2012

21. The Bourne Legacy (2012)

PG-13 | 135 min | Action, Adventure, Thriller

61 Metascore

An expansion of the universe from Robert Ludlum's novels, centered on a new hero whose stakes have been triggered by the events of the previous three films.

Director: Tony Gilroy | Stars: Jeremy Renner, Rachel Weisz, Edward Norton, Scott Glenn

Votes: 315,668 | Gross: $113.20M

A standard action thriller that wasn't necessary.

29/8/2012

22. The Disappeared (I) (2008)

96 min | Drama, Horror, Thriller

Following the disappearance of his younger brother Tom, Matthew Ryan tries to put his life and sanity back together. However the past keeps coming back to haunt him.

Director: Johnny Kevorkian | Stars: Harry Treadaway, Greg Wise, Alex Jennings, Tom Felton

Votes: 2,103

An anodyne, predictable drama that will quickly "Disappear" from my mind!

25/8/2012

23. Pearl Harbor (2001)

PG-13 | 183 min | Action, Drama, Romance

44 Metascore

A tale of war and romance mixed in with history. The story follows two lifelong friends and a beautiful nurse who are caught up in the horror of an infamous Sunday morning in 1941.

Director: Michael Bay | Stars: Ben Affleck, Kate Beckinsale, Josh Hartnett, William Lee Scott

Votes: 351,973 | Gross: $198.54M

A romanticized war drama with only the last 40 minutes being entertaining and visually compelling.

25/8/2012

24. The People Under the Stairs (1991)

R | 102 min | Comedy, Horror, Mystery

57 Metascore

Two adults and a juvenile break into a house occupied by a brother and sister and their stolen children. There, they must fight for their lives.

Director: Wes Craven | Stars: Brandon Quintin Adams, Everett McGill, Wendy Robie, A.J. Langer

Votes: 39,685 | Gross: $24.20M

A weak thriller with an underlined social message. A juvenile horror from Wes Craven.

22/8/2012

25. The Raven (I) (2012)

R | 110 min | Crime, Mystery, Thriller

44 Metascore

When a madman begins committing horrific murders inspired by Edgar Allan Poe's works, a young Baltimore detective joins forces with Poe to stop him from making his stories a reality.

Director: James McTeigue | Stars: John Cusack, Alice Eve, Luke Evans, Brendan Gleeson

Votes: 88,300 | Gross: $16.01M

A Sherlock Holmes type thriller but less fulfilling. With only John Cusack carrying the film along, the relentless story in which a fan imitates the work of an author becomes boring and routined.

12/8/2012

26. 44 Inch Chest (2009)

R | 95 min | Crime, Drama

47 Metascore

A jealous husband and his friends plot the kidnapping of his wife's lover with the intention of restoring his wounded ego.

Director: Malcolm Venville | Stars: Ray Winstone, Ian McShane, John Hurt, Tom Wilkinson

Votes: 7,133

It felt like i was being punished more then the "French Lover"! A title that suggests something entirely different to whats been produced. A mix of Richie and Tarantino but not as clever or explosive!

8/8/2012

27. UHF (1989)

PG-13 | 97 min | Comedy, Sci-Fi

32 Metascore

An unemployed visionary becomes the manager of a local television station. The station becomes a success, with all sorts of hilarious sight gags and wacky humor.

Director: Jay Levey | Stars: 'Weird Al' Yankovic, Victoria Jackson, Kevin McCarthy, Michael Richards

Votes: 31,540 | Gross: $6.16M

The songs are enough to keep you entertained but for a full length movie it just doesn't work! A couple humourous parts but too much of "Weird Al".

01/07/2012

28. The Glass House (2001)

PG-13 | 106 min | Crime, Drama, Mystery

34 Metascore

An orphaned teenager is taken in by a Malibu couple but discovers they aren't the caring friends they seemed to be.

Director: Daniel Sackheim | Stars: Diane Lane, Leelee Sobieski, Stellan Skarsgård, Bruce Dern

Votes: 39,853 | Gross: $18.00M

With the synopsis giving any suspense away, the film is left with a story that's easily predicted and ruined from the start.

19/6/2012

29. Ghost Ship (2002)

R | 91 min | Horror, Mystery, Thriller

28 Metascore

A salvage crew discovers a long-lost 1962 passenger ship floating lifeless in a remote region of the Bering Sea, and soon notices that its long-dead inhabitants may still be on board.

Director: Steve Beck | Stars: Julianna Margulies, Gabriel Byrne, Ron Eldard, Desmond Harrington

Votes: 109,062 | Gross: $30.11M

It clutches at the strong beginning and then sinks with the ship!

10/6/2012

30. The New Daughter (2009)

PG-13 | 108 min | Crime, Horror, Thriller

A single father moves his two children to rural South Carolina, only to watch his daughter exhibit increasingly strange behavior.

Director: Luiso Berdejo | Stars: Kevin Costner, Ivana Baquero, Samantha Mathis, Gattlin Griffith

Votes: 16,133

A promising story that starts of like any other cliche horror and ends with no revelations. An unoriginal, recycled, suspenseless movie with a pretenious kid and a boring father.

19/05/2012

31. Seeking Justice (2011)

R | 105 min | Action, Crime, Drama

38 Metascore

After his wife is assaulted, a husband enlists the services of a vigilante group to help him settle the score. Then he discovers they want a 'favor' from him in return.

Director: Roger Donaldson | Stars: Nicolas Cage, January Jones, Guy Pearce, Harold Perrineau

Votes: 48,004 | Gross: $0.04M

Not exactly a bad premise for a film. I mean, how far would you go for Justice? But the acting isn't brilliant! And the lack mystery and suspense just leaves a mindless action film. Another Xander Berkeley film to cross off the list.

11/05/2012

32. Creep (I) (2004)

R | 85 min | Horror, Mystery, Thriller

Trapped in a London subway station, a woman who's being pursued by a potential attacker heads into the unknown labyrinth of tunnels beneath the city's streets.

Director: Christopher Smith | Stars: Franka Potente, Sean Harris, Vas Blackwood, Ken Campbell

Votes: 31,762

Re Watched 29/4/2012

An undeveloped, rentless horror that provides nothing in the way of originality or even a solid script!

33. The Human Centipede 2 (Full Sequence) (2011)

Not Rated | 91 min | Horror

17 Metascore

Inspired by the fictional Dr. Heiter, disturbed loner Martin dreams of creating a 12-person centipede and sets out to realize his sick fantasy.

Director: Tom Six | Stars: Laurence R. Harvey, Ashlynn Yennie, Maddi Black, Kandace Caine

Votes: 42,983 | Gross: $0.12M

One of the most, disturbingly gross films that doesn't actually go anywhere until 40 minutes into the film! A pretty dyer film that makes me wonder what things are going through Tom Six mind!

27/4/2012

34. Hanna (2011)

PG-13 | 111 min | Action, Adventure, Drama

65 Metascore

A sixteen-year-old girl who was raised by her father to be the perfect assassin is dispatched on a mission across Europe, tracked by a ruthless intelligence agent and her operatives.

Director: Joe Wright | Stars: Saoirse Ronan, Cate Blanchett, Eric Bana, Vicky Krieps

Votes: 206,915 | Gross: $40.26M

"Modern day Leon" was one of the reviews that propelled me to rent this movie! However, i'm thoroughly disappointed. A boring, unmemorable, and unsatisfying film which leaves a few holes unanswered!

21/04/2012

35. Battleship (2012)

PG-13 | 131 min | Action, Adventure, Sci-Fi

41 Metascore

A fleet of ships is forced to do battle with an armada of unknown origins in order to discover and thwart their destructive goals.

Director: Peter Berg | Stars: Alexander Skarsgård, Brooklyn Decker, Liam Neeson, Rihanna

Votes: 257,432 | Gross: $65.42M

I only went to see this film for Skarsgard and Neeson and as they were hardly in it, i was left with an unlikeable lead followed by a pointless Rihanna and an overused, predictable script! The premise of the film isn't entirely bad (working along the lines of a popular boardgame) but over a 2 hr film with nowhere they could actually go left for boring viewing!

18/04/2012

36. The Devil Inside (2012)

R | 83 min | Horror

18 Metascore

In Italy, a woman becomes involved in a series of unauthorized exorcisms during her mission to discover what happened to her mother, who allegedly murdered three people during her own exorcism.

Director: William Brent Bell | Stars: Fernanda Andrade, Simon Quarterman, Evan Helmuth, Ionut Grama

Votes: 37,519 | Gross: $53.26M

Another dumb ass film to add to the ongoing paranormal, devil possessed genre! A generic, predictable, exorcist movie that pulls the same punches as all the others! I wouldn't waste your time!

37. The Hunger Games (2012)

PG-13 | 142 min | Action, Adventure, Sci-Fi

68 Metascore

Katniss Everdeen voluntarily takes her younger sister's place in the Hunger Games: a televised competition in which two teenagers from each of the twelve Districts of Panem are chosen at random to fight to the death.

Director: Gary Ross | Stars: Jennifer Lawrence, Josh Hutcherson, Liam Hemsworth, Stanley Tucci

Votes: 1,004,174 | Gross: $408.01M

A well recieved film that i didn't understand the hype that surrounds it! Hopefully the follow up films are better, however, with a slow beginning and undeveloped backgrounds on the characters leaves me a little confused (Especially as i'm yet to read the books). A great cast with extraordinary scenes but nothing that engages me.

38. Don't Be Afraid of the Dark (2010)

R | 99 min | Fantasy, Horror, Thriller

56 Metascore

A young girl sent to live with her father and his new girlfriend believes that she has released creatures from a sealed ash pit in the basement of her new home.

Director: Troy Nixey | Stars: Katie Holmes, Guy Pearce, Bailee Madison, Bruce Gleeson

Votes: 50,595 | Gross: $24.04M

A rather dull horror that apart from the beginning, held nothing to scare or cringe at! A pretty decent cast if not a little whiney from Bailee Madison but nothing to get excited about.

19/02/2012

39. Vanishing on 7th Street (2010)

R | 92 min | Horror, Mystery, Thriller

50 Metascore

The population of Detroit has almost completely disappeared, but a few remain. As daylight disappears they realize that the Dark is coming for them.

Director: Brad Anderson | Stars: Hayden Christensen, Thandiwe Newton, John Leguizamo, Jacob Latimore

Votes: 27,324 | Gross: $0.02M

Theres something intriqueing about this movie but with few questions answered, your'll be left bewildered! A post-apocalyptic horror that left me thinking that perhaps it was "Adam and Eve" at the end?

4/02/2012

40. Baby's Day Out (1994)

PG | 99 min | Adventure, Comedy, Crime

After three kidnappers lose the baby they have kidnapped, both the cops and kidnappers go looking for the baby.

Director: Patrick Read Johnson | Stars: Lara Flynn Boyle, Joe Mantegna, Joe Pantoliano, Brian Haley

Votes: 55,691 | Gross: $16.67M

A predictable 90s slapstick comedy that can keep under 5s entertained but bore the rest!

41. Homicide (1991)

R | 102 min | Crime, Mystery, Thriller

84 Metascore

A Jewish homicide detective investigates a seemingly minor murder and falls in with a Zionist group as a result.

Director: David Mamet | Stars: Joe Mantegna, William H. Macy, Vincent Guastaferro, J.J. Johnston

Votes: 8,175 | Gross: $2.97M

A boring, self loathing film that obviously didn't hit the mainstream world of movies. Joe Mantegna was great but the script seemed to rushed.

42. Contagion (2011)

PG-13 | 106 min | Drama, Thriller

70 Metascore

Healthcare professionals, government officials and everyday people find themselves in the midst of a pandemic as the CDC works to find a cure.

Director: Steven Soderbergh | Stars: Matt Damon, Kate Winslet, Jude Law, Gwyneth Paltrow

Votes: 316,081 | Gross: $75.66M

A realistic concept that can plague the minds of all that see however, without even needing to watch the film, you already know how the film will pan out! An all star cast but a slow paced thriller.

29/10/2011



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