MTZink Reviews

Shot Caller (2017)

Nikolaj Coster-Waldau Deserves An Oscar - If Oscars Were Worthwhile Today

[8/10 · 1 May 2024]

Hollowwood celebrates all the wrong things, that's for sure. Here my expectations were completely turned around. No, space aliens didn't interrupt any prison yards and nobody displayed any superpowers ... except in the superb treat of story, writing and performance.

"Con tries to go straight, insert yada, yada, yada." No need to rinse and repeat that trope but Nikolaj Coster-Waldau has been great in other things so PERHAPS a good choice to run in the background? Not if you invest in a fraction of this story which unfolds without pace bogging down. You'll get the reassuring sense you're in for a good show right away. Well done everybody.

Road House (2024)

Absurdly Enjoyable - Humans With Titanium Bones & Faces

[8/10 · 23 March 2024]

Hey. Jake Gyllenhaal's cheerful grins and attitude throughout. What's not to like? Rated on overall enjoyment and entertainment, definitely not realism or the slightest connection (besides title) to the 1980s classic that was a completely different movie altogether. And while the old one was great in its ways, this new version holds together as long as you know what you're getting.

Along those lines: Speaking from an ex-EMT and many years in Trauma Centers and Emergency Rooms, it doesn't matter how tough or buff you may be when it comes to face punches. Ultimately it's just a thin layer of very vascular skin and tissue over very hard bones (skull) OR very weak ones (just about every other facial bone except may the chin). Human faces, bodies and structures just CAN NOT sustain such blunt force (nor knuckles in many cases). Ribs will break ... to say nothing of the (mostly important) soft organs inside or ... oh, fuggidaboutit.

Alone (V) (2020)

29 Minutes And 17 Seconds

[3/10 · 15 March 2024]

Other than wondering what why the hell the main character even bothered with a U-Haul trailer when she had a half-filled extended car with roof racks, it rolled out pretty well until the inevitable moronic decisions begin racking up. By 29 minutes and 17 seconds it was time to admit this was going nowhere and time to check the reviews.

I was right. It was going no where fast; nothing fresh or entertaining beyond slack-jawed, drooling fools that enjoy the same old, same old stupidity of lame thriller attempts.

Holy hell, I had the same trailer on a recent move and had more than that on the roof rack. Also:

1. Why don't single women on trips carry, oh I don't know, ANY kind of defensive weapon like, just a suggestion again, A GUN? If that guy pulled half the INITIAL creepy sh$t to any farm gal up here in Powder River County, Montana, he'd be cold on the ground. Each time. Speaking of, she could have cold-cocked him with a full soda can when climbing in her car. Or maybe going OUT your side?

2. Perhaps report it to the police with a full description instead of waiting for the 3rd hostile act? There are these things called vehicle models and license plates.

3. Where the hell does this take place? Down at the end of Otter Creek here that nonetheless still has white lines on the road and even the occasional other car? Half of it looked like it was shot on park or camping lanes. What happened to the rest of the world?

Oh boy, dumped in the serial killer room. Oh, that's right. She escapes and the stichk is about wilderness. Except not any "wilderness" or even a dense city park I see from other comments. My remote farm's east border is that of Custer National Forest. A long creek valley, hilly grass prairie up to steep, forested and incredibly complex canyonlands. I ... or even my 8-year old nephew ... could easily ditch a brigade on foot. The mere chances of meeting or catching up with someone would be impossible if the runner had any brain cells engaged ... hell, enough visitors and hunters get lost/separated as it is with full plans, radios and GPS! Glad I stopped it.

Get with it, filmmakers. Constant roll-out of shlock; does ANYBODY there have any talent left? Seems not at all. Go outsource. Getting old.

Horrible Bosses 2 (2014)

Sad Fallback To Cheap Genital "Humor"

[5/10 · 14 February 2024]

Holy hell, are we a society of twelve year-olds?

Yes, I may be older but hardly a prude and just fine with some sparse vulgarity ... yes again, when done right. That usually means subtlety. But here, once another weary dick joke (or worse; the ladies are hardly exempt. In fact, Jennifer Aniston pretty much degrades herself beyond the gag ... and sadly must emphasize No Pun Intended. Sigh.) becomes the focus, they overwhelm with far too much time and far too much stupidity.

Unless, as noted, you're twelve years old.

20 minutes to go watching it and had to break for a little check of reviews thus far. And while some recognize the overall vapid content here, not one that I've seen has noted the unnecessary vulgarity. But hardly read them all. It's worth mentioning here because instead of an assembly line of low humor in some flicks, they take each such gag and (dammit) milk it dry and beat it over our heads, LONG past funny and far into weary, Yeah, I Get It. Shock value with Aniston saying those things. Or her and the boys stretching what should be a fast line into extended skits.

But other than that ... cut out all the vulgarity and enjoying it just fine; laughing out loud and mostly impressed. Nothing wrong with vapid comedy. Cheap vulgarity is lazy. May add to the run time but also the viewer's SKIP time.

Stillwater (2021)

Still Waters Run Deep

[7/10 · 18 January 2024]

Exactly describes Matt Damon's character.

And the main reason I'm writing this review because I'm stunned not to see this quote in the review titles.

I'll let others parse out the specifics again but overall this is a SLOW BURN DRAMA with very little "action" or high-idle story lines. Matt Damon is a national treasure; a superior actor to the point I could probably go into the tiny Montana town nearest the farm where everybody generally KNOWS or HAS SEEN everybody before ... spend an hour with the Hardware Earl fixing a tractor tire, only to have me realize an hour later that that was NOT Earl but Matt Damon playing Earl.

Not for the dumb, vapid or impatient. In fact, it's taking me 3 days to go through it unless I sit down and pay 100% attention. For ME, an older single male without children, I found the daughter -- the very pivot of supposed sympathy and motivation -- to be unlikeable. SKIP SKIP The interpersonal dramas with the French family and Maya (good tho she was): SKIP, SKIP. These are the best parts noted for others with the patience, mood or heart. (Not me)

I think about a quarter of the movie is still waiting; unlikely to go back as I really don't care BUT again, due to my demographic.

A Dark Place (2018)

Engaging From Start to Finish

[9/10 · 16 January 2024]

Very satisfying.

I rate movies (lately) on their engagement. Are they entertaining me? Am I drifting off after the first ten minutes, opening YouTube in another window and checking email?

Nope. While I did view it in several chunks per usual as Life demanded attention elsewhere but no letting in run in the background. When I restarted it I sat down, eyes and ears on. Far as I'm concerned, Andrew Scott should have rated an Oscar nomination for his performance. (For whatever those are worth these days).

I'll let the other reviewers parse the details out. For me, it was a refreshing, ENGAGING change. Sole reason not to give it a perfect 10 is a personal wish for a more ... perhaps more complex ... wrap-up.

Don't Worry Darling (I) (2022)

Best to Go In Blind

[7/10 · 8 September 2023]

Thanks to all the failures out there, any new movie is usually considered more than first impression. Check reviews. Check plot. Check ratings. And while this has saved me from a lot, I would suggest, IF POSSIBLE, to go in blind on this one. With as little foreknowledge and expectations brought by the above.

For me, I had never heard of it. The cast was enough to give it a chance along with the regretted viewing of the short Netflix clip that comes along with it. My 95% certain, 100% mistake was suspecting it was some remake or variation on The Stepford Wives. Nope. It drew me in and held my attention throughout. That is worth a 7 right there.

Summary? I enjoyed it. Love the protagonist; too old/lazy to look up but she did a fine job with the others. The only non-spoiler criticism is that there was not enough. And what IS here just seems a light touch on what Could Have Been. Then again, some decry the too complex or are disappointed in being handed everything vs imagining for yourself. Worth the time but in another world, could have been much, much more.

The Pope's Exorcist (2023)

If I Only Had A Dime For Every Angst-Ridden Teen

[7/10 · 18 August 2023]

Ohboy. Nearly ended it right at the start, as soon as I saw the obligatory family group with the obligatory smartass, eye-rolling, angst-ridden teen. CHECK. Younger sibling with headphones in back: CHECK. Mom not slapping smirk off teen. NOPE.

Russell Crowe was enough draw and pulled off a very strange character (curious how much he was personally trolling or just having fun with it) as well as his priest helper. Thus about 10 minutes in, I find myself at the same point we all have: shrug. Aw, nothing better on so may as well let it roll while I cook dinner. No real rewind moments besides gawking at the superior sets. Shrug.

Except for jumpscare cats or the kid NOT having asthma or some other insufferable medical condition, it was a bland assembly-line of the usual offerings with the only curiosity or originality being in the sequence served. Then the inevitable WTF CGI-stuffed flash climax. Sigh. Some noted an absurd "power up" sound around that point but I swear I heard a burst of an engine firing up like on Flight of the Phoenix. Or my imagination. Hard to tell here. Just a standard fare with very good production values.

Polar (I) (2019)

Erased All Doubt In First Five Minutes

[10/10 · 14 April 2023]

Another retiring hit man description. Sigh.

I passed this by dozens of times, never quite in the mood for what I assumed was a pat plot with pat action and another standard fare on an oft-repeated general story. But somewhere along the line, Mads M had become one of the few actors whose inclusion, much less the main character, made it worth (at least) a chance.

Opening looked good ... for about 40 seconds until I see Johnny Knoxville. While okay for his brand of rinse/repeat portrayals, I almost backed out from the start ... until the story began and was silently celebrating. So grateful Knoxville's part was not a major one. Instantly got my respect.

From then on it was an entertaining ride, consistently offering better takes on each assumed "trope" and keeping me pinned to the end. Except for some of the more brutal scenes I just didn't care to wallow in but Got The Point.

Without spoiling it, this was also the first time something was depicted around a certain type of pet that disturbed me in any other movie without exception, actually generating a laugh.

The only raised eyebrows came with minor details that usually pass by unnoticed today, such as how certain flamboyant bad guys/gals in leather outfits and war paint like a Marvel villian could even get from Point A to Point B in even this Clown World today without getting noticed... when I would think keeping a low profile would be endemic to their whole existence.

There is, of course, no such Montana town as depicted, at least as far as I've seen, being in residence for decades from Glacier Park to now a remote ranch in Powder River County. However, the town was authentic as well as the cabins depicted. I could believe it. Others (not here on IMDB I've seen) have commented to the valid effect of how such wonderful places could be for rent and not run as a million-dollar vacation home (on location, not size) but they ARE out there... such as this 1880s cabin I miraculously found with an entire ranch attached for the unbelieveable price of $300/month. 8 months in and finally realize it's NOT a ruse or having the expectation of one night looking out to see a crowd of hooded figures with torches. Tons of work involved just to maintain the grounds and at least here, only 1 nearby town with food prices higher than an airport gift shop. Talking $4.89 for a can of chili (beef cheap and others okay but overall YIKES). Requires a monthly, 100-mile trip to the nearest IGA for reasonable grocery prices. This is due to a long roundabout way to get here vs. The other town (Broadus) that has a paved highway down from the major interstate further north.

But that's digression; they portrayed that part accurately. Mads only stregthened my admiration and this film is well worth the watch. Oh yeah ... even in such a movie like this, it's good to see realism as a foundation with people lacking John Wick-style superhero powers, luck or coincidences. Bravo.

On a Wing and a Prayer (2023)

Tropefest Galore & Notes From a REAL Allergy

[3/10 · 8 April 2023]

Dang it. Only an hour in, supposed to be getting sucked into the drama and instead have to break to check IMDB to confirm my suspicions. More failed writing, inconsistencies obvious to a 5 year old and a growing number of weary tropes and cliches. Why, oh why? The comments thus far speak to most.

1. Annoying children jammed in for no reason. Kids that simply do not exist in the real world. Adds nothing to the story and only distracts.

2. One second they're seeing the ground coming up, maybe 5,000 feet or so... next second they're a thousand feet above the cloud deck.

3. Casting: "Well, real guy was white, so we need him to be a black dude instead." The little girl with the black friend. Check. All concerned like adults where if any real kid thought they were to hear a crash, they'd be saying "Cool!" and eagerly recording it for content on their YouTube channel.

4. Idiot calling on a cell phone from the tower to call, of course, the one guy that can save them; all dramatic as it's against fed rules instead of, oh, I don't know... stepping out for a minute? Or maybe explaining to the sup first?

5. Is there some MPAA rule requiring some dumb kid to have terminal peanut allergies? Of course they never have the adrenaline near. I myself AM deathly allergic to peanuts but at least for me, I can sense it a mile away like a whiff of gasoline. Still had close calls if not paying attention, such as 10 years ago when I gobbled down some chocolate cake loaded with it. You start feeling it pretty quick but NOBODY shows it like it is. Here the kid just acts like she lost consciousness, slumps in her seat without any hint or sign of airway compromise or the intense soft tissue swelling.

Anaphalytic shock swells you up like a balloon, including your airway which is the big threat. Tissue can swell up, block your airway then you die. THAT'S how it kills you. It ain't like venom that will kill you on itself but the effects. Last time above? I WORKED full time at the local ER ... close enough (10 minutes) to race there (280Z) and stumble in as airway swelled. I'm a bit distinctive, too... tall, skinny like Ichabod Crane with face to match yet my own shfit workmates did not recognize me and kept asking for my name.

Note: most say epinephrine (epi pens) but is essentially the same as adrenaline; my term bias only. Never used one but ex EMT as well and may be wrong but jamming it into a leg would not be my choice. Hoping to hit the femoral? Who knows?

Will let the rest of the comments tackle the rest and leave with a final note to all out there on acute anaphylatic reactions: If an epi pen is not around, most asthma inhalers (if not all) contain adrenaline and will work in a pinch. More common and recognizable. Carry on.

Happily, once adrenaline is on board, it's like an instant switch. Resolves fast.

Clarkson's Farm (2021– )

Heartwarmingly Engaging Real Life Fun

[10/10 · 14 February 2023]

Bravo.

(What? 600 characters required? In this case, anything else would be redundant) OK, fine.

Fascinating beyond measure. One of those series in which you breathe a sigh of joyful relief at noting a next episode is waiting, try to moderate but end up binging to the end.

My uncle had a big farm and always a wonder; a life-long dream in another world. Then last summer, I lost my Rockies rental and lucked out on a rare affordable out-of-town rental but turned out to be 450 miles SE to Powder River County in an extremely remote area ... with an 1880s farm attached. Have green light to do what I want; 150 years of ... well, everything is still here (if a timeline of American farm machinery was just abadoned-in-place). Have little experience, less resources, extreme hazards (UK maritime winters? I wish. And no rattlesnakes, bears, mountain lions or coyotes to be seen there! Plus Western vastness incl 400 head of Angus and Longhorns) but having the time of my life along with jumpscares and fear. Walking out to CGI beauty each day is worth it all.

Yet one day on Clarkson's Farm still stirs the envy. And the joy. Tune it in and go with your own heart; will take only a minute or two to decide.

The Rig (2023– )

Did Its Entertainment Job. Unrolled like classic SF novel to me

[8/10 · 13 January 2023]

That's how it felt to me, at least.

But I'm old. A rare high rating too... at least from first glances, not wishing to let trends contaminate my fresh impressions.

I was entertained from the beginning, relieved to see no plodding first hour of setting up primary characters and situations. Felt similar to a good paperback. The few absurdities in character (as in one guy who probably would end up in a makeshift brig sitting on his termination/legal charges) were worth it just to see the results. This character also had a damn good "arc" as they say, along with all the primaries. Most of which turned out to be ... different than expectations or first impressions as they developed.

Boiled down? You know the dozens of things you wade through for entertainment. So when something that makes you go back it's a nice change. Did it's job.

The negatives: 1. Oooh, Scottish. Cool as always but thanks for the closed captions at times.

2. CGI from Looks Durn Good To Me to A Bit Funny.

3. Just one character who doesn't seem too impressed about near-death experiences, still drawing breath in the first place and things damn high on the Wow. You Don't See THAT Every Day list.

4. Huh? Well, maybe that's because I've never been on a drill rig but then again, WTF?

-- Finally, already surprised at a lower rating than expected, I suppose I'll get outta here with a final hey... if you want what I saw as excellent writing and a story to match, go for it. It won't take long to see positive first impressions are consistent. Skip thru you choice of subplot.

The Shaft (2001)

Stingers For Dummies

[5/10 · 1 December 2022]

The bulk of the comments on this one can be carried by those before me.

(Unrelated question: ever notice how most reviews roll out the plot as if we didn't just see it? Or maybe that's just me as I tend to get into the comments AFTER a movie to see if I agree. Usually do but a curious thing how so many people rehash the entire plot. Perhaps something to do with this stupid 600 character limit. Yo, IMDB. Sometimes brevity is the most powerful. Now that I met the limit...)

The whole terrorism angle at the end was ridiculous. What gave them THAT idea? Excuse for a little spectacle, I guess. However the whole stinger missile scene was laughable. Stingers pack about a pound of high explosive in a titanium sheath designed to penetrate aircraft.

Targeting range of up to 15,000 feet. Add in the propellent, the ejector launch and rocket itself, firing off a Stinger in an enclosed shaft at a target about four feet away would have vaporized the dude and anyone near the open door.

The Lost Continent (1968)

Fundamentally Freaked Me Out As Kid

[10/10 · 11 November 2022]

Okay, to be fair, this is a random "Yeah! What the heck WAS that movie?" thought (insert debate on 7 year-olds watching such movies; likely a drive-in. Plus it was 1968 Los Angeles ... a different world).

Ah, internet. "horror movie stuck in Sargasso sea tentacle monster plant things" for search terms and BOOM. Faster than I could verbally ask my brothers (assuming I dared risk triggering THEIR childhood trauma).

So review based on the following 55 years of geniune delicious shudder if anything reminded me of this obscure flick that nonetheless made such a powerful mark. (600 characters yet?) ... yep. Likely to fall into the temptation of seeing it as an adult and, like another fundamental, DeMille-level, nightmare-triggering masterpiece (to a kid) like The Green Slime, discover it miiiight not have the same impact. Yet I recall enough that it WAS a good ride in the end!

Earthstorm: Volcano (2022) Season 1, Episode 2

Ok, I Admit Only 90 Seconds In But WOW

[10/10 · 7 November 2022]

This is the second episode which followed Tornadoes. Which from the very start told me this was NOT going to be like another yawner or the background white noise I was half-expecting. Simply because I've seen so many of these.

Now I have to explain this dent in the coffee table from my jaw. I also had no intention fo reviewing this now. 90 seconds in? No recall of ever pausing a show so fast to see if the vast internet would give an epilogue to the wide-eyed events even before the dang intro! IMBD folk are mostly trustworthy, on my same page and WOULD have noted it if I wasn't graced with the first review.

One of the top weather shows ever. Yeah, a lot is clearly a guess but based on experience. Buckle those seatbelts.

The Dustwalker (2019)

Half Good Try, 1/4 Utter Fails, 1/4 Pointless Lack of Explanations

[2/10 · 1 November 2022]

You've been there before.

"Oh, looks good ... on the surface. We'll see." Surprised I let it run on after that quick realization the quality would NOT deliver past the ... sigh ... typical half-as'd lazy, lame jobs of late. But then again, this was laundry night so had other things to do.

Little investment past background noise and a rising amusement to see how they'd wrap it up. It had become one of those regretted choices that still give some value in commiserating with reviews that show you're hardly alone. And here, the FIRST time I'm turning to reviews in the hope one explains WTF just happened. The ending made zero sense; and this coming from a published SF/horror writer with a cursed overactive imagination. Bumpkus in any attempt to conjure up one from what was shown. Can only assume the crew simply gave up at some random point, jammed in that absurd final scene and called it good.

Higher Power (2018)

You Be The Judge. Oh, I'm No Robot

[2/10 · 26 May 2022]

Rats. Going down fast; bare 2 stars by now (16 min in, I quit) This looked like it had potential but got suspicious 10 minutes in. Better check IMBD reviews. Gauge worth vs. Waste of precious life left on Earth.

Hmmm. How to decide against an odd mix of SUPER reviews and BAD?

1. Pick and read 1 (or 2) highest AND lowest reviews.

2. Go back to flick for 90 more seconds. What's your gut telling you?

That's all. Besides noting all the rave reviews have odd grammar, unrealistic absence of contractions ("I am" vs "I'm") and sound like the text of your latest camcorder manual.

The Guardians of Justice (Will Save You!) (2022– )

Disjointed, Confusing & Indiscipherable

[2/10 · 13 March 2022]

At least my opinion. Nearly triggered a seizure without any history of same. New characters pile through like a revolving door in a completely indecipherable storyline.

Bailed after 2nd episode with alacrity yet that was enough for a lingering hangover feeling from the exposure. Also: attempting to create new superheros (powers or names) in this saturated genre takes extreme thought and creativity vs these lazy ones.

The Boys Presents: Diabolical (2022)

Shooting Selves in the Foot

[1/10 · 12 March 2022]

The actual SERIES of The Boys is tremendous.

This juvenile pile of steaming garbage does nothing but harm the franchise. All over dumb, cheap bathroom humor ala the best that Seth can manage these days then add a ton of excessive violence.

Oh. And soak all in F-bombs, the standard fallback to weak minds, weak character and even weaker creative skills. A disservice to all discerning fans except for the lowbrow droolers. NONE worth the insult to your tastes.

Rabbids Invasion: Rabbids Invasion: Mission to Mars (2019) Season 5, Episode 0

Unexpectedly Hilarious

[8/10 · 1 March 2022]

Currently I can only get online long enough to download some movies for later. No long considerations ... that looks okay ... maybe THAT.

Old dude; know NOTHING about Rabbids but seeing Ubisoft at opening suggested it based on a video game. Uh-oh. This looks dumb. Had big doubts for first few minutes but then got hooked and damn, ended up laughing out loud more than blockbuster comedies. And MOST was subtle, adult-aimed excellent writing that kids may not notice.

Just how Rabbids squeak-ball bounce kills.

Well done and worth it (no woke crap either beyond a couple caracicatures).

Space Jam: A New Legacy (2021)

The New Poster Boy For Hubris and Disgust

[17 July 2021]

First movie review for a movie I won't see and will do everything to avoid.

Why? LaBronda. Congratulations, you've also become a classic example of hubris. Most Hated Player in NBA now. As such, I don't care WHAT it is. Only need to see your mug attached to know it's true value. Zero.

The Tomorrow War (2021)

Solid Entertainment - Whatta Change, Eh?

[8/10 · 3 July 2021]

Other reviewers will parse it out the details. For me, however, I watched this after back-to-back viewing of the last 2 Godzilla flicks; not typical to gorge on 3 "blockbuster"-types so quickly but... allowed a good comparison.

All big SFs; this one superior in story, characterization and overall execution.

THANK ALL THE GODS for now wearisome social-anything; people fighting for their planet. Any diversity was natural.

Story exceeded time/scope in a single movie. Thus would have been 9 or 10 without, sigh, the standard "Waitaminute" plot holes or WTFs or Gotta Be In A Movie These Days. Youse know what they are. But overall, better than 90% of the movies recently.

Radium Girls (2018)

An Otherwise Good Tire Seriously Underinflated

[3/10 · 19 June 2021]

Good cast with nothing to deliver. Simply ineffective storytelling or character engagement with more wearisome modern social tropes. Waste of time.

Game Night (I) (2018)

Solid Entertainment

[8/10 · 8 June 2021]

Cynical of this genre when not done well but very well done here; good show.

Sole minor anklebiters that pulled me out were common: "ordinary" people exceeding realistic risk, protagonist stupidity/clumsiness and the annoying absence of bystanders, neighbors, traffic, other citizens, police, fire, air traffic control or any other life form in an otherwise crowded city to facilitate more than one scene that WOULD be noticed. Simple lazy writing points that marr an otherwise perfect polish. Cast superb.

Monty Python: The Meaning of Live (2014 TV Movie)

A Celebration of the Unique Gift to Humanity of Monty Python

[10/10 · 7 June 2021]

Huge impact since catching as a (bemused) youth in 1970s.

Well-done. Salute, gentlemen. Anything else would be redundant.